Chase's spicy corner

For me, this has never been an issue, but I do know that if someone is being negatively impacted socially/mentally due to their kinks, the best thing for them is to step back from that kink. From my experience, this doesn't happen very often. Most people who have fantasies about noncon, bestiality, incest, etc., don't want to do those things irl. This is important to keep in mind. Just as how violent video games don't inherently make someone more violent, but solely playing violent video games all the time can have negative affects in some people - and they need to know when it's time to step back and evaluate how they are feeling (i.e., if they start applying 'video game logic' (kink fantasy logic) to real life).

Of course, when it comes to RPF, the line between fiction and reality does blur. But what I've found with most RPF enjoyers is that they want to be very much kept away from any interaction with the actual people they are fantasising about. Obviously there will always be the 'stalker' fans who take it too far - this is when fantasy starts to affect reality - but pretty much everyone I interact with is like 'yeah if I ever saw this person irl I would run in the opposite direction'. LOL.

Secondly, it is so, so important to remember that fiction is not reality. A character getting hurt is not the same as a real person getting hurt. To me, morally, what matters most in determining whether something is good or bad, is whether someone is getting hurt. A fantasy written on a blog, or drawn in a sketchbook, doesn't hurt anyone. What I've said above should be kept in mind, but overall, fantasies that aren't enacted in real life, do not hurt people.

As a graphic murder in a slasher film does not hurt the actor nor designate the writer as a secret murderer, but may 'inspire' someone to go kill in real life, I do not see my fantasies - and posting them to the internet - as directly harmful even if they 'inspire' someone to do harm. That person was probably already going to do harm. Hopefully no one is using my work to self-harm, and no one is using it as a guide for real life relationships or dynamics. I, like the horror movie writer, do not condone many of the things I write about being enacted in real life (... I am a horror movie writer also).

Thirdly, when it comes to how these kinks translate to real sex, it is important to note that the majority of kinksters want to roleplay certain scenarios with another consenting adult... they don't want to actually hurt anyone. I too am asexual, so I don't get involved in real kink scenes, but from what I understand, RACK is incredibly important. That starts for risk-aware consensual kink.

If someone has a noncon kink, for example, that would translate to consensual non-consent (roleplayed noncon) in real life. If someone had a bestiality kink, they might get their partner to roleplay as an animal. If someone had an incest kink, their partner might roleplay as a family member. Etc. These acts of roleplay do not hurt any real people - no one is really assaulted, no animals are harmed, no one is fucking their brother, and so on. People don't really choose what turns them on, but 'taboo' kinks are popular oftentimes because they are taboo. I won't get into the psychology of that here, but there's a reason 'stepbro' porn is one of the most popular genres!

It is important, in my opinion, to encourage people to explore their kinks in a safe, consenting, and judgement-free environment, so they don't feel disgusting for having statistically normal kinks. A lot of people have noncon kinks, actually.

One might argue that roleplaying noncon, incest, etc., is harmful to real victims, as it fetishises their trauma. Well, firstly I would argue that an actor playing a murder victim isn't disrespecting real murder victims. But also, a lot of people in these scenes are also victims, who are using their kinks as a way to process their trauma.

Now, if you (not you, anon, you as in the general you) are experiencing desires / fantasising about harming real people - children, animals, dead bodies, etc., - beyond the realm of roleplay, then that would be classed as a 'paraphilic disorder', rather than a 'kink' (though they can overlap) and this is something that can be aided by a medical professional (psychiatrist/therapist). A lot of the time, part of the therapy to help combat these desires/cause no harm to oneself and others is finding a suitable replacement to direct these desires onto - often in the form of roleplaying those desires or an aspect of them with a consenting adult, or creating art to express those desires.

Kink can help people who have gone through trauma. It has been recommended, even, to explore certain scenarios in a safe and controlled setting as a way to help deal with past trauma. 'Taboo' kink really helps a lot of people!

The fact that I am asexual probably does help a lot with my OCD around sexual desires. I can reason easily to myself - without all of the above - 'of course I don't want to do all that in real life, I don't even have normal sex'. This doesn't stop me from having sexual intrusive thoughts, but it does help a lot with dealing with them.

In general tho, anon, I really think that the main focus for you should be unlearning shame. Perhaps you have been made to feel shame in the past - personally or impersonally - for enjoying certain things in fiction, or you have a strong moral compass and you are worried about what your fantasies say about you. Well, I can tell you that usually, taboo fantasies don't really say anything about you, other than the fact that you enjoy 'forbidden' topics. Unless your erotica consumption is genuinely harming your perception of reality - i.e., causing you to think about harming real people/animals/etc. - then you are most likely all good.

It can be hard to stop feeling shameful and guilty about certain fantasies. I still get the feelings sometimes! But just remember:

'Thought crimes' aren't real - not a message of legality (though posting about weird sex is perfectly legal so long as no real person is being exploited) but rather morality. The thoughts in your head or fantasies you post about do not actively cause harm and have no intention of causing harm.

Fiction is not reality. Whatever you enjoy in fiction doesn't directly translate to real life. If you want to try out a kink, there are consenting adults all over the place who will help you!

It is perfectly okay and healthy to keep yourself in check, analyse your own kink content consumption, and stop yourself if you have worries about it harming your mental health. But you shouldn't be a strict self-critic and you should allow yourself to have fun!

Sometimes, even I get too tired and squicked-out to answer certain kink asks on here. But I just take a break, come back to it another time, when I feel less weird. This happens with some of the mildest, least-kinky asks too. One cannot be horny 24/7... lmao.

I'm glad to hear you enjoy my writings. I hope you found this response helpful, if you got this far! Hopefully you consider what I have said and learn to feel less shame around enjoying this stuff.