warp drive

Bye Yuna it was so nice to meet you thank you for making me pasta and welcoming me into your family if you don’t mind Please text your lovely son Shane before you come over because I Will be ravaging his muscular body in ways that make us both very happy and sweaty until the second you arrive ok bye xo

I’m so glad to hear that, I don’t think I’d be able to deal with birds punishing me by sending me to things that are not bees

friday the 13th leading into valentine's weekend is so crayzmazingly pussy popping I feel gothically horny just thinking about it

I've always thought it's too bad that disco is the only kind of dance that comes with an artifact. It's compelling that disco has a Ball. I want to know what secrets will be revealed if I gaze into it. There should be a hip-hop Cube. A ballroom Amulet. A swing Diadem.

if magic was real I'd get really into wizardry long enough to learn like 3 spells then move on and 4 years later id be like oh yeah I remember how to summon flame. probably. and then id do all the hand motions out of order and explode

[After shoveling the driveway for hours] Snow should be illegal [remembers I'm against the carceral state] We should restructure society so that snow doesn't happen [remembers we are actually doing that and it's very bad and also why this snowfall was so bad] Uh-oh