um anyway so here are some âdamian bein a babyâ headcanons that literally no one asked for but imma just put it out there anyway because 1) dami deserves it, 2) i deserve it, n 3) i have nothing better to do (except homework but fuck that)
@dc - here are my demands:
give me damian with wiggly teeth n gap-toothed smiles
give me damian baring his teeth at a villain to Intimidate⢠them but it kinda falls short bc heâs missing his whole-ass front tooth
give me damian constantly wiggling his tooth day in n day out so much that it hurts but in that weird, addicting kind of way that you just canât stop doing it
wiggly teeth annoy the fuck out of damian n theyâre really distracting to him but he doesnât let anyone pull it out bc the league used to do that really harshly, like even if the tooth was just a little bit wiggly n it hurt him :(Â
just yanking wiggly teeth out is fucking terrifying to me jfc
give me bruce angsting over the fact that he missed his babyâs entire childhood only to realize through a really nonchalant remark at the dinner table that dami still has a good amount of baby teeth left n it just hits him like a fucking freight train that his baby is still a baby
suffice to say the batfam takes tooth fairy shenanigans wayyyy too far
give me damian + the fam fighting a bunch of criminals in a dark alleyway and damian spends the entire time distracted, wiggling a loose tooth n a goon gets a lucky shot in
the guy punches him across the face hard. it goes by really fast so all dami can really remember is stumbling and falling and the next thing he knows heâs spitting out blood and his tiny baby tooth. his tiny. BABY. tooth.
everyone just stares at it for a good five seconds before the batfam goes fucking feral on that poor dudeâs ass
damian amidst the chaos thinking âhuh that was efficientâ n purposefully seeking out random bad guys to fight so they can knock his wiggly teeth out baby thatâs not healthy jadsdnjkasd
give me damian bein small enough to hide behind his dad & older siblings
like yeah the bratâs as confrontational and in-your-face as you can get, but conversations can get overwhelming n sometimes he just doesnât want to interact w people
so he just,,, ducks behind the nearest batfam member and waits for the other person to stop talking so they can leavvvvveee
heâll periodically peek out from behind whoever heâs hiding behind to glare at the other person
itâs a wonder how brief and concise conversations can be when thereâs a tiny angry little gremlin glaring at you
family members with capes are most preferred bc theyâre more easy to hide behind - so that means tim, steph, cass n bruce
but damian hides behind jason a lot too bc heâs so small n jasonâs so much bigger than him, it makes him the ideal hiding spot
âuhhh jay?â âyeah?â ânot to freak you out or anything but i just noticed thereâs a big lump in the back of your jacket.â âno there isnât.â âum??? yeah there is? itâs right ther-â âwhat fucking lump. thereâs no fucking lump. shut upâ
jason would rather die again than admit it but he likes it when dami hides behind him, itâs like a silent show of trust n it makes his Big Brother Instincts⢠ (that he totally has) go completely insaneÂ
he even considers getting a cape just cuz it would make it easier for damian to hide but ultimately decides against it bc a cape and a leather jacket?? would look kinda stupid
plus damian doesnât seem to mind the capelessness so.
the first & second time damian instinctively hides behind jonâs cape to avoid a conversation, poor superbaby is very very confused
the third, fourth n fifth time he turns bright pink
by the sixth time he ends up just absentmindedly staring at the other person w a bright red face and a half-lovestruck expression n that other person just. slinks away.
sorry i had to add in that little bit of jondami y'all know i have no self-control
give me big brother tim. GIVE ME BIG BROTHER TIM JFC
tim is designated Big Brother With A Cape⢠and fuck everyone who thinks damian wouldnât exploit that
im talking these two cuddling on rooftops in the middle of patrol or a stakeout bc damian gets cold really easily
like damian would just be sitting in timâs lap and tim would wrap his feather-cape around them
they look like one ginormous bird-lump-thing
for some reason they naturally gravitate to cuddling on ledges and yeah dick does not get Good Vibes⢠from that, but he knows theyâre capable n he trusts them to take care of themselvesÂ
is it ooc to make them love each other? maybe. but fuck canon so.
give me one of the other batfam members finding tim and dami nestled together like this on a ledge and theyâre just like
âwhat the hell are you do-â âweâre roosting. fuck offâ
âscoot over im joiningâ ânope. this is strictly a robins only activity.â ââŚwtf i was robin too?â âno i mean current robins onlyâ âbut youâre?? not robin either??â âim red robin dumbass itâs in the nameâ
âim changing my nameâ âyou canât just fucking do that.â âtoo late im Robin-Hood now.â (it goes on n on ânight-robinâ âbat-robinâ âsignal-robinâ âspoiler-robinâ etc. etc.)
tim lets them join even tho theyâre all cheating cheaters who cheat
damian was just knocked tf out in timâs lap the entire time so he doesnât have to listen to all this bullshit :)
in the interest of having this not be the longest post in tumblr, iâll just end it there. if anyoneâs interested hit me up n iâll gladly scream about other hcs with yâall all day everyday