Stardust to Dust

"dad" I say, my eyes barely open "it's Colonel Sanders" while pointing down the hallway. He looks, and at the end of the hallway, there's a portrait of an old man, the donor who paid for the wing of the hospital I'm recovering in.

My dad explains as much to me, and goes "I mean the guy *kinda* looks like him, but why would Colonel Sanders pay for a hospital wing Mississauga Ontario? I think those drugs might me messing with you"

Then the nurse comes out of the room. I go "hey, who is that picture of?"

She looks at the portrait. She looks at me. She looks at my dad. She looks at the painting. She looks at me again.

"you don't recognize the Colonel??"

Finally finished painting this water nymph

Well, darn. You'a caught us banning a disproportionate number of'a trans women, people of'a color, trans people in'a general, and other such'a things. These suspensions took ten thousand'a years to reverse, and some of them we didn't even reverse because we'a fucking hate you.

We'a sorry it took so long to address this! We'a really hoping our pathetic april fools gimmick'a distract everyone else to'a forget about the situation! And for most of you, it'a worked! We'a can't discuss our trust and safety issues publicly because the paper on our board just'a say "get rid of all the people we consider freaky" and if we announce that we'a gonna lose our privilaged "Tumblr’s userbase has the highest proportion of LGBTQIA+ folks on social media" claim!

One thing we want to emphasize is that we are stupid, stupid, stupid'a people. Our CEO, Matt Mullenweg, is a pathetic moron who'a try sucking up to'a Elon Musk on'a X despite the tire fire over there. You'a know he searches up his own name and harasses Tumblr blogs whenever they'a say bad things about him, right? We moderate this website with extreme bias and will cry like'a babies when called out on it.

We understand that the communications sent to affected'a users, and our broader silence to'a the community, didn't meet the standard people expect from us. Or rather, it has become the standard and the userbase'a livid with us. We'a plan on announcing changes to how we do this and not actually following through with them, because we'a do not care.

Going forward, we're committed to ruling with impunity: lying wholesale when confronted with our'a faults, and never sharing any information outside of'a vagueposting.

Tumblr belongs to everyone. Except'a minorities, people of color, trans people, and anyone who'a advocates for them.

To the people whose accounts were affected, and to the members of our trans community who felt targeted: eat'a shit.

Really sad news, everyone.

Rupert Giles, you phenomenal character. Anthony Head, you incredible actor, who brought such subtlety to this role. At times dark, at times comedic, always hot.