I wanted to tell you that
I am still here
I wanted to tell you thatÂ
it’s been a long time but
I am still alive.
I wanted to tell you that
It was rough,Â
I loved and I lost many times
But now I know what love should mean
Now I know how to be what I need
I wanted to tell you that
Recovery comes and goes in splinters,
It recedes after tidal waves,
that it hardens, overheats and shatters
I wanted to tell you that
I am writing from California
I always wanted to move. I finally made itÂ
and I used my experiences to comfort others
I wanted to tell you
One day you will wake up and feel better
I wanted to tell you
You aren’t wrong for leaving
I left behind everything
I wanted to tell you
I learned more than I ever knew I could
I still read poetry but I don’t smoke
And I stopped drinking so much
I wanted to tell you
I never gave up,
I’m doing better
I wanted to tell you
I don’t know why I ever had to endure feeling so hollow
Somehow now I know the signs of trouble
I leave sooner and forgive easier
I don’t know how it’s possible
But I wanted to tell youÂ
I’m barely recognizable
My priorities are stronger. I am stronger
I wanted to tell you
It’s not been easy, it’s been harder
But I’m doing much better
I feel hope for my future
I think life is best when we all stick together
not just when it’s easy, but when it’s terrible too
I will never forget you
And I’m okay. I mean it this time
I just wanted to tell you.















