Uxorious Wife

• Calling her beautiful

• Pulling her close

• Holding her waist

• Kissing her slowly

• Caressing her face

• Grabbing her chin

• Holding her thighs

• Praising her

• Kissing her neck

• Biting her lips

Now we’re here.

People without mental illness and who haven’t experienced trauma have no idea how hard it is to talk about, let alone heal, from it. And when I say it’s hard to talk about, I mean that in multiple senses of the word:

Traumatic experiences and/or mental illness are hard to describe/explain.

You may lack of the vocabulary/jargon for describing abstract thoughts and feelings.

There are conflicting descriptions that are all still true.

You’ve ever talked about it before. You don’t want to rehash it all again.

You don’t know where to begin.

You’re daunted by the scope of everything you’ll need to comb through, and you’re not sure if it’s worth unpacking.

You haven’t found a doctor who believes/understands/supports you properly.

You’re not on the right med(s), so discussing your trauma or mental illness can range from difficult to impossible.

You have no support system to fall back on.

You feel drained after every conversation.

You lack the money or insurance required to get the care you need.

It’s retraumatizing to talk about it.

You experience PTSD symptoms.

Your mouth/body will physically not allow you to speak of it. (Think selective mutism.)

There is a great physical and emotional toll that recovery takes on your mind/body.

Your brain will “erase” or “lock up” memories so that you literally cannot recall entire chunks of your life.

You live in a community—home, neighborhood, city, country, whatever—that places a stigma on mental health care.

You might’ve had bad experiences while receiving mental health care in the past.

You believe you’ve been misdiagnosed and aren’t getting the proper care you need.

You’re not sure if what you’ve experienced “counts” as trauma or mental illness, so you never bring it up.

You fear judgement, loneliness, isolation, guilt, shame, fear, etc. will result from you being care.

You feel as though it is “too late” for you to recover.

You experience bigotry of any kind, and are seeking care from people who understand your lived experience.

There’s a song that’s been proven to reduce anxiety by 65%. It’s called Weightless by Macaroni Union, and it was specifically designed to slow your heart rate, reduce blood pressure, and lower cortisol levels. It’s so effective that it’s dangerous to drive while listening to it because it can make you drowsy. Source Source 2 Source 3

It was one of the first Tumblr posts I favorited.

Sound therapists and Manchester band Marconi Union compiled the song. Scientists played it to 40 women and found it to be more effective at helping them relax than songs by Enya, Mozart and Coldplay. Weightless works by using specific rhythms, tones, frequencies and intervals to relax the listener. A continuous rhythm of 60 BPM causes the brainwaves and heart rate to synchronise with the rhythm: a process known as ‘entrainment’. Low underlying bass tones relax the listener and a low whooshing sound with a trance-like quality takes the listener into an even deeper state of calm. Dr David Lewis, one of the UK’s leading stress specialists said: “‘Weightless’ induced the greatest relaxation – higher than any of the other music tested. Brain imaging studies have shown that music works at a very deep level within the brain, stimulating not only those regions responsible for processing sound but also ones associated with emotions.” The study - commissioned by bubble bath and shower gel firm Radox Spa - found the song was even more relaxing than a massage, walk or cup of tea. So relaxing is the tune, apparently, that people are being Rex advised against listening to it while driving. The top 10 most relaxing tunes were: 1. Marconi Union - Weightless 2. Airstream - Electra 3. DJ Shah - Mellomaniac (Chill Out Mix) 4. Enya - Watermark 5. Coldplay - Strawberry Swing 6. Barcelona - Please Don’t Go 7. All Saints - Pure Shores 8. AdelevSomeone Like You 9. Mozart - Canzonetta Sull’aria 10. Cafe Del Mar - We Can Fly

One of the comments suggests pairing it with Rainymood.

I put on some good headphones and listened to the whole thing in one sitting. I was like “yeah that’s pretty damn chill, alright, but idk if I’d say it’s ‘the most relaxing song in existence’.”