You're My Kinda Guy

“SPLIT UP! IT’S OUR ONLY SHOT AT THIS!”

Those were the last words that Drake had heard before Vixen had taken off into the desert. He knew this was their hiding place.

But she wasn’t here.

Drake’s heart stopped as he dismounted the black stallion. Knelt in the dirt before the wooden shed and wondered what he was going to do. He couldn’t accept this fate. He couldn’t accept this.

In the shock and grief that coursed through him, Drake didn’t hear the padding hoofbeats of the centaur until it was too late.

Drake spun around, confronted with the brown and white body of a Clydesdale, huge hooves that could pound his face into a million bloody shards. The man’s face was as broad and square as the rest of his body, and the five pointed golden star on his chest made Drake freeze. He still lifted his revolver even though it was a futile gesture, and the centaur already had his out.

“Hey, hey now!” The man’s voice boomed. “Don’t you be doin’ somethin’ so stupid, boy.”

Drake started to shake, pulling the hammer back. There was no guarantee he could even kill the sheriff, and if he was here… Everyone else would be too.

But he could join his sister in hell.

Something shone in the centaur’s eyes, and to Drake’s bemusement, he padded a step closer. “… You. You’re… you’re the boy!”

Drake hesitated, his hellish resolve starting to falter. “What are you talking about—”

“The boy! And the girl! Your sister!” Klaus’ hoof dug into the ground. “Four years ago, it was my first big case… We heard shootin’ on a ranch outside of town, and me ‘n the other fillies ran for it! We thought it was a murder but…” Klaus came closer until Drake’s gun was an inch from his horse’s chest. “.. But the only thing we found was a shithole of a human man yellin’ at his kids. You n’ your sis… Barely grown up then, weren’t you?”

The shaking that coursed through Drake was something else entirely. The grip on his gun loosened, and Klaus’s fingers pushed the revolver out of his hand.

“You’ve been runnin’ all this time,” Klaus said, “Haven’t you?”

Drake felt his grip go slack. Rough hands lifted him by the shoulders, stood him up and brushed him off. “Mighty hell,” the centaur rumbled again. “That’s what all this bank robbin’ and thievin’ is about, isn’t it?”

Drake nodded, and felt his voice crack when he spoke. “I… I don’t know where Vixen is. We ran and split up, a-and—”

Klaus snorted, and it took him hardly any effort to lift the twig of a thief onto his back. “I saw your sister,” Klaus said. “And if we hurry, we can catch up to her an’ the boys ‘fore they lock her up.”

The centaur didn’t give the human time to respond before his hooves tore into the desert and he began to run.

Miles / Tony - Fallout AU

A small sneeze woke them both.The redheaded Khan groggily pushed himself up onto his elbows as he tried to twitch his nose in an attempt to ease the itch. Sand always worked it’s way into unwanted places and having dusty snot wasn’t exactly uncommon. Miles wiped his nose with the back of his hand and glanced over to his partner as the man rubbed his eyes. A ratty unzipped sleeping bag covered them both enough to be called “modest”, but it wasn’t a mystery that they were naked. Scars littered their bodies, along with crude tattoos and several track marks that were a few days old. Tony grumbled and coughed once to clear his throat. Neither of them had gotten much sleep and it was still fairly early. The sky was smudged with hues of purple as the sun just began to peek over the horizon. “Hey Boo…” The pointy man flopped his weight onto Miles as his arms intentionally gave out. Normally the ginger would have wrapped his arms around the other Khan and held him close, but instead he was a touch distracted. “…Are you digging in your ass?”“We are NOT fuckin’ out here again! Sand! Sand everywhere! Shit, I don’t care if my brother walks in on us again! Ugh—!” A loud snort escaped Tony as he flopped back into the sand that had been warmed from their bodies. “I dunno, Miles. Keep the sand there and maybe I’ll find a pearl next time. I bet that’d get some decent caps.” His laughter ceased as soon as a handful of sand hit him in the face.

Klaus / Locke - Fallout AU

“Sure thing darlin’” Another mockingly used pet name came from him as he started to walk toward the inside of the Inn.  He grabbed Locke’s hand as he did so, dragging the intoxicated brit in the proper direction.  However he stopped at something that wasn’t the front desk.  

“Wait, wait, we need some’a the robes.” Klaus murmured and stumbled into the gift shop.  Not but a minute or two later he came out and shoved a yukata into Locke’s hands.  It was covered in a fruit pattern, including pineapples.  Klaus’ own was green and covered in adorable numels, what the inn was named after.  He hastily and sloppily put it on over his clothes, tying it how he thought it should be done.

Somehow Locke’s face managed to redden further, “A show!? No!” He wasn’t going to perform for any audience! He just wanted this to be done with already, by the time the two even got a chance to get going again his frustration will have disappeared! He crossed his arms as he was sat down and glowered weakly up at the cop. “Well?” The heir visibly perked up when Klaus came up with something.

"Haha, never underestimate my quick mind, gent." Klaus laughed out, an obvious joke as he tapped at his drunken head.  He waited one Locke's decision, his fingers digging into the other's hips and ass.  Ah!  A yes!  Klaus smirked something smug, or at least the best he could.

He was glad at least that he didn’t wipe Klaus out with his impromptu decision to pack spirits, even gladder that he apparently didn’t hangover a potential client. Straightening up a little, he slipped into his salesman routine as the Arcanine capered up and nuzzled his hand. 

"Well we got little versions of all the ladies you see here," Jason said, nodding over to the four in the courtyard. "Least those are the flavors we got on tap but we’re more than capable of orderin out. Got plenty of friends in the business and can pretty easily get our hands on pretty much anything y’all want. Lady runnin around these parts with a Larvitar we scrounged up for her brother as a kinda present."

Then came the salesman side, though he did have some good wares to show.  Klaus tapped his chin as Jason went on.  He looked at the pokemon on show, the goat was tempting, he had to admit.  There was so many pokemon to pick from however.  He was an animal person, he couldn't resist the chance to get a well bred baby.

Still, he could have done better than a dirty hick, right? A dirty hick with big hands and just as strong hands and squishy muscles. His eyes were bright up close. Locke wanted to slam his knife into one of the sockets and twist. Locke noticed, in a bit of a haze, that the cop did stop when he pushed on him. It was a small gesture he found himself appreciating and giving the man brownie points over, even if he had no intent on stopping. After he explained what he wanted he squeaked as his feet were no longer touching the ground. His legs instinctively wrapped around Klaus’ body while his fingers remained dug into his chest.

He snickered a bit at Locke, "I think yer dinner was all a'that alcohol"  Klaus looked at the other expectantly and slumped a tad at the news.  He wasn't keen on a potential boner killer like that.  

"Hm.. my room?" Klaus pondered, there was some ladies, the brothers, and those two cartoon loving guys.  Didn't they both hit on him?  Klaus couldn't remember.  "Uh, I don' think they're all night owls an' I don' want some of em expecting some sort'a... show.."

In an attempt to take a breath Locke found something other than air forced into his mouth which in turn pulled another gagging sound from him. Klaus was everything the heir thought a cop wasn’t in that moment, making out with the person he wanted to arrest and sure breaking a few of his own moral codes. Or maybe Klaus was just a bad cop sort of guy, not that Locke had ever gotten that vibe from him. Liquor was a powerful thing, he settled on. 

Somewhere in his mind an alarm was going off but he was intoxicated by more than the booze in his system.  Even as Locke dug his teeth into the southerner's tongue.  He winced and panted as he was forced to hold still a few moments before the Cabrera pulled back.  

Klaus raised a brow at Locke, was he too sober for this stupid decision now?  The cop didn't have a chance to think make any sort of sloppy come back before he sucked in a breath at the nails raking down his chest.  It took him a second to process what Locke said before a mess of a smirk spread across his face.  Without wasting a minute, his hands dug into Locke again with a mocking chuckle. This time he hoisted the skinny brit up and wrapped his legs around the cop's strong frame.

The man’s eyes squeezed shut and an airy mewl was shared through the kiss. Fuck, that hurt! His hands were more like bear paws and he swore if the hick clung on any tighter he’d break the bones. A relieved breath left Locke as he filled his lungs, right he needed to breathe between things. He snapped a glare at the cop and curled his lip back to reveal those same sharp teeth. 

Klaus laughed sloppily as Locke said they weren't big, "They are so!  Don't worry, sugar, I like 'em"  He spoke jokingly and gave a waggle of his brows before his mouth was back on Locke's to keep him from arguing against that fact.  The cop sucked in a sharp breath of air through his nose as Locke's nails found his skin and scratched along the freckles.

As Locke turned to make a sloppy get away and sob into yet another pineapple he found himself blocked off by a strong arm and whipped around fast to face the other man’s thick body. The drunken Cabrera anticipated a punch that was sure to knock out a tooth or two. Instead a squeak escaped him as the man above him forcibly smashed his lips against his. Locke’s brows rose high on his head as he tried to process what was happening. Mistake! Regret! Abort!

Unfortunately that's what Klaus decided he should do.  Of course one motion led into another, like it was what he'd wanted to do from the moment he spotted him.  Like he wasn't the heir to a horrid criminal family.  He mashed his lips against Locke and it was amazing for a moment, until the other's inhumanly sharp teeth snapped his lip and made him stop.

Wait, shit, that was a bad choice wasn't it?  Klaus mind almost had a moment to sober up and realize what a bad choice he'd made.  However that was lost as Locke only hissed out that was the leader and violently returned the kiss.  The cop froze for but a minute before he pressed back against Locke.  Hell no, Klaus was submissive to nobody, especially not Locke of all people.  He pushed the brit into the railing as his hands wandered to his hips and dug in hard enough to bruise.  Shit he had big hips, how did Klaus never notice before?