Sylvia

“Zenitsu-den” is described as absurdity with events that don’t even fall in chronological order; but its swordplay and descriptions of demons are masterfully vivid and its developments may sometimes keep you on the edge of your seat. On the other hand, many sections are clearly lacking in explanation, and the author doesn’t even keep track of all the details or side character names. Speaking of the side characters, it’s said that the characters whom he depicts as the ugliest (men who are close to Nezuko who he resents for this) are actually handsome in real life, whereas the author depicts himself as a slim but tough man, but is said to be a chubby sweet tooth in real life who has trouble growing facial hair. His wife Nezuko is described down to the very number of her eyelashes. We know from Tanjiro’s comments in the Fanbook #2 comic that Zenitsu took seven pages each to describe himself and Nezuko (including adding somewhere that he, Zenitsu, is 2.7 meters tall), whereas other characters were lucky to get maybe two lines of messy introduction. While the author claims everything in the story in true, it’s almost entirely flights of fancy, and it takes a lot of dedication to read the whole thing and make any sense of it.

(Side note: It’s not clear if “Zenitsu-den” was ever published or if the only copy of each of the 79 volumes remains Agatsuma family property. What we do know that Zenitsu made his own illustrations, and the realistic paintings which his wife modeled for were things that people repeatedly offered him money for. He was known to have screamed “WHO WOULD SELL THEIR OWN WIFE” as his pants ripped apart at the butt because he was so worked up. Really unnecessary detail, but this is the Taisho Secret our favorite alligator chose to share.)

As for when Zenitsu began writing, it was sometime after settling into the Kamado household. The impetus was Tanjiro giving him a stern warning to stop doing shameless things like pretending he’s in pain so that Nezuko will rub his legs for him (and therefore stop paying attention to Inosuke). Tanjiro seems to interpret this as Zenitsu diving into his own fantasies after having been scolded. Even if Zenitsu might had been a bit upset with Tanjiro at first, Tanjiro is nonetheless the person whom he is most eager to show his writings to. In presumably a short time, he’s written a lot.

If we assume Zenitsu never edits and just wrote everything in the order of the arcs, then based on the content Tanjiro encountered with demon!Inosuke and Princess!Nezuko (and thief Sanemi somewhere or other, which I must assume is due to Zenitsu cheesed off about Sanemi sneaking into their home and leaving presents), then we can assume he already wrote the following arcs, though I’m more included to believe he inserted later writings into earlier parts of the story order.

The Birth of Zenitsu Arc The Demon Slaying Arc ~Fated Encounters~ The Heavenly Maiden Arc ~I Am Willing To Die For You~ The Tastiness of Nezuko-chan’s Cooking Arc Warring States Nezuko-hime Arc The Life of the Man Who Loved The Spirit of the Plum Tree Arc Zenitsu the Ninja Arc ~Love Like A Flash of Lightning~ Battling the Boar ~The Leaves of Darkness Flutter~

That’s… a lot. Like, over a third of the arcs. Not that we know how long these arcs are, but if Demon!Inosuke is the boar they face in that arc, then Tanjiro was put through a lot of reading. That story didn't even have "Arc" in the title. Then again, it’s just as likely that this Boar was simply the leader of the terrible boars whom trouble tanuki!Nezuko. Anyway, the arc dedicated to Nezuko’s cooking seems truly inspired. To go back to that “Spirit of the Plum Tree,” this reminds of a certain god of scholarship who is also a vengeful lightning god. It’s said that when Sugawara-no-Michizane was banished from the Heian capital, the spirit of the plum tree which he loved from his garden flew to his side in exile. I get the feeling that a lot of Zenitsu’s writings are self-inserts for himself and Nezuko in other stories he liked; Sengoku/Warring States and Ninja stories would had been popular fiction Zenitsu had grown up around, and there’s no end to folk tales of Tennyo/heavenly maidens. Also, the spirit of the plum tree is the example of how beautiful his illustrations are when his wife served as the model.

What with those first two arcs having relatively grounded topics, I have to wonder if Zenitsu started with realism in mind and then got flying off the handle. After all, fighting demons was a pretty big deal in his real life and his descriptions of demons were said to be remarkable, so I’d like to think that volume in particular was more grounded in true events than others (I suspect Yoshiteru was (re)reading this volume, or he had finally made it to the end of Volume 79 when Touko kicked him in the back). And, since there is a lot of sad content in that arc, it’s like he buried that second arc in all the more fanciful, triumphant arcs that came after it. Then again, if these writings are Zenitsu’s coping mechanism for a life that never usually went well for him, then it’s just as likely the circumstances of his birth were of godlike nature as opposed to the sad, short story of an abandoned baby with no name. Anyway, Zenitsu kept writing: Beautiful Swordswoman Nezuko Arc The Golden Dragon Wandering Alone Arc ~Go And Rescue Nezuko!~ Botamochi from Zenitsu Arc If we assume the content is similar to how Zenitsu twists real life people and events to make himself look better… I really wish I knew the context for that Botamochi one. Botamochi is another word for Ohagi. Somehow, this chapter is inspired by Sanemi. Is this where he takes in the thief persona, sneaking in and taking Zenitsu’s sweet snacks instead of leaving them? Or, if it implies someone presented ohagi, is this a story about Giyuu and Zenitsu hijacked it??

As for that Golden Dragon, is this a reflection of all those solo missions he went on, separated from Nezuko? Or was there any period of separation in real life? It’s always been a headcanon of mine that Zenitsu moved out of the Kamado house first to set up a nice place for his wife to live before they were married, so maybe in a period like that, however short? Or did he write that whole arc while she was on a visit to the Butterfly Mansion?

Also, is Zenitsu giving us the reverse AU we all dreamed of for Nezuko? I love and adore that he gives her a chance to be badass in these stories too. Speaking of being badass, Zenitsu seems to have some idea what he was like when he was asleep, as perhaps reflected in the next arc. Maybe this one was truer than he knew:

Rumble of the Knock-Out Secret Swordsmanship of Zenitsu Arc ~The Legendary Man’s Eyes Shine With Light~ And while he’s thinking back to other experiences in his demon slaying years… The Potato Feudal Lord Arc Wasshoi!! Rengoku-san, is that you!?!? And does the following have any Pillar influence too? Little Mouse-Boy Zenitsu Arc …nahhh. Speaking of Pillars, though, Tanjiro pointed out in the earlier arcs that Zenitsu was already the Thunder Pillar, though he didn’t particularly do anything cool to earn that title. We have no idea how old Zenitsu is by the time he’s writing these middle arcs, or what amusements he sought while having to navigate life as an adult, as presumably as the head of a family. He might had wanted to go back to being babied a little. The Dragon Palace Arc ~Eternal Nezuko~ Reference to Urashima Tarou and his time spent with Otohime at the underwater palace.

Sitting In A Happy Circle and Boiling Tea in Our Bellybuttons Arc I chose to literally translate this idiom for "doing something ridiculous." Since the Thunder God is known to steal bellybuttons, I wanted to keep the reference there. The Future Holds Zenitsu Arc Are you embracing adulthood, Zenitsu-kun?? Alternate translation ignoring the implied idiom in favor of being more literal, “Zenitsu Just Up Ahead Arc.” Pianist Zenitsu Arc ~Nezuko Like Raindrops Dripping from the Eaves~ Please tell me he was a pianist in real life. Please pretty please. Also, it's purely headcanon, but I want to think Yushiro found himself reading this one day and enjoying it before it occurs to him who wrote it and who these characters are and he feels disgusted by Zenitsu out-simping him.

The Gods’ Shrine Maiden Nezuko Arc She really gets to try everything, doesn’t she.

Zenitsu Makes A Fortune in A Single Stroke, Wahaha! Arc Wishful thinking? A spin on the truth of his youth?

Life or Death Struggle! Zenitsu the God Arc Is this where he writes about the battle with Kaigaku? Or is this just a setting in which to bring back Miko!Nezuko?

Big Romance☆Glittery Zenitsu Arc It has no canon basis, but I like to headcanon that around the 1970’s, Zenitsu takes Nezuko to Paris as a sweeping romantic gesture and takes photos of her the whole time. It is now my headcanon that Zenitsu wrote about himself glittering in Paris, being the best romantic partner ever. We’re winding down to the final arcs, though, Zenitsu’s got to be getting old by the time he wrote this one…

Master Zenitsu Arc ~The Appearance of a Great Teacher~ We know from Fanbook #2 that the modern day kids know Breath Technique, as they were preserved by performing them once a year at a shrine. This means Zenitsu satisfactorily taught Thunder Breathing to a successor. As many of his writings turn real life situations around from making him look bad to making him look good, I have to wonder if he was covering up his shame at being unable to pass on all the techniques Kuwajima taught him, or if he reached a point where he felt truly satisfied with having made a good teacher of the Thunder technique.

And speaking of getting up in years… I Will Be In Love With You A Thousand Years Arc ~Again, Even If We Are Reborn~ This is the part when I cried out. You guys. NEZUKO DIED FIRST. Like, I already had that guess, if we interpret Touko and Yoshiteru as their reincarnations. I’m glad that was never expressly stated even if it was heavily implied, because there’s nothing nice about former lovers being reborn as siblings, especially bickering ones. But, with Yoshiteru being so close in age to Touko, this implies that Zenitsu might had stuck around long enough to meet baby Touko before passing on to join her, whatever form that might take. Great-Grandpa Zenitsu wasn’t done writing yet, though. After Nezuko passed on, it seems he finally found it was time to write the last arc, of unknown length… The Life of Happiness Arc ~With Everything Based On The Truth~

………………………………..ausdtiatdiyagsdfyuATsdyguydfautsdfxduASDsfahtdFUASygDJHASDGyaGDSilU

You guys

I can’t

It’s just