spoiler alert

❝   oh ,  one question.  where  am  i ,  who  are  you ,  &  what’s  going  on ?   ❞ ❝   cool .  cool .   i  have  some  questions .   ❞ ❝   are  you  sure  you  want  to  hear ?   ❞ ❝   cool ,  bring  it  in ,  man !   ❞ ❝   you’ll  stand  by  my  side  no  matter  what ,  right ?   ❞ ❝   promise  me .  say  it :  “ i  promise  i  will  never  betray  you  for  any  reason ”   ❞ ❝   somebody  forked  up .   ❞ ❝   i  mean ,  you  do  get  how  that’s  worse ,  right ?   ❞ ❝   maybe  it’s  not …  ACTUALLY  all  that  bad .   ❞ ❝   i’m  just  asking  you  to  fudge  a  little  bit !   ❞ ❝   i  have  a  stomachache .   ❞ ❝   that’s  ‘ fun ’ .   ❞ ❝   okay ,  that’s  really  specific  &  makes  me  think  that  you  definitely  did  do  that .   ❞ ❝   what  a  condescending  bench .   ❞ ❝   let’s  just  face  it ,  [ name ] ,  you  don’t  belong  here !   ❞ ❝   this  is  a  putrid ,  disgusting  bowl  of  ethical  soup .   ❞ ❝   that  was  my  first  time  as  a  fashion  “ don’t ”  &  i  was  NOT  here  for  it .   ❞ ❝   you’re  the  most  self - obsessed  person  i’ve  ever  met .   ❞ ❝   time  to  pick  a  designated  driver .   ❞ ❝   before  you  say  anything …  that’s  it ,  i  just  don’t  want  you  to  say  anything .   ❞ ❝   we’re  gonna  bang  it  out .   ❞ ❝   okay ,  i  won’t  let  you  down …  starting  now .   ❞ ❝   remind  me  what  i’m  getting  out  of  this  again ?   ❞ ❝   oh ,  so  NOW  i’m  supposed  to  be  nice  &  make  friends ?   ❞ ❝   i’m  telling  you ,  [ name’s ]  out  to  get  me .   ❞ ❝   i’ve  got  something  you  could  slip  into .   ❞ ❝   of  course ,   the  opposite  might  be  true .   ❞ ❝   huh !  what  do  you  think  that  means ?   ❞ ❝   throwing  sand  is  an  excellent  way  to  put  out  a  vodka  fire .   ❞ ❝   good  people  make  me  insecure .   ❞ ❝   i  would  LOVE  not  to  listen  to  you .   ❞ ❝   that’s  a  very ,  very  bad  idea .  do  NOT  be  yourself .   ❞ ❝   i  said  a  lot  of  other  nice  things ,  toughen  up ,  nerd .   ❞ ❝   it’s  nothing ,  it’s  a  tiny  little  inconvenience .   ❞ ❝   dude ,  you’re  hiding  something !  what’s  wrong ?   ❞ ❝   what’s  wrong ,  what’s wrong ,  what’s wrong ,  what’s  wrong ?   ❞ ❝   what  have  you  done  to  me ,  you  monster ?   ❞ ❝   you  are …  unbelievable .   ❞ ❝   get  your  story  straight ,  bro .   ❞

feel free to change any pronouns, etc. || may contain some nsfw!

“You’re the only one I can rely on to stay strong right now.”

“We got fire and shelter– that’s a start.”

“I never thought I’d be so pleased to see your face.”

“Knew a feller– got bit by a dog; died an hour later.”

“Thanks for coming for me.”

“Y’know, we’re gonna need to come up with a better story for that scar.”

“So, freezing, bleeding, starving, damn near getting eaten to death, ain’t good enough for you?”

“You always said revenge is a luxury we can’t afford.”

“You know I got your back.”

“Is that any way to greet an old friend?”

“You’re always one with the jokes, aren’t you?”

“I just don’t want anymore people to die.”

“Sounds like he has more than enough to share.”

“Get to work, but stay out of trouble.”

“I’ve seen shit with more common sense than you!”

“You’re my favorite parasite. No…ringworm’s my favorite parasite– you’re my second favorite parasite. I lied… Ringworm, then rats with the plague, then you.”

“I’ve got an unfortunate face.”

“You won the fight already– surely that’s enough?”

“I could do with a break from this place.”

“I fear you don’t know how to help anyone excepting yourself.”

“Only the feeblest of men take jobs in the government.”

“Please send him my worst regards.”

“[Name] wouldn’t know sadness if it died in is bed.”

“It’s about time that you started to earn you keep.”

“Why do you have to speak so much? It’s…incessant.”

“Looks like I’ve turned into the goddamn errand boy.”

“You ain’t as tough and dense as all that.”

“That’s not how you are.”

“Well, maybe you don’t know me as well as you think you do.”

“How did someone even come up with them words?”

“I ain’t chopping vegetables for a living.”

“I’m sorry, [Name], was there insufficient feathers in your pillow?”

“I ain’t afraid of dying.”

“I ain’t here to rob you, though that seems easy enough.”

“Think of it as payback for [Name].”

“I ain’t in the revenge business, [Name].”

“I swear he talked the whole way and never actually said a damn thing.”

“He somehow manages to be both lucky and unlucky at the same time.”

“You should’ve taken the money.”

“You know me; I like to make friends in low places.”

“You mess up– it’s just one of them things; I mess up– I’m the prize idiot.”

“You are a man of profoundly limited intelligence.”

“Well, of course, it’s probably a trap…but what’ve we got to lose finding out?”

“Okay, just keep calm until I give you a reason not to.”

“Oh, my dear and trusted friend, with you watching over, I would walk into hell itself.”

“I dream too big; I care too much– that’s my problem.”

“All you do is complain when things don’t work out– except when it’s your goddamn fault.”

“If you ain’t gonna be civilized about this…”

“I don’t expect you to understand this, but I have never been more proud of you than I am right now.”

“This place ain’t no such thing as civilized– It’s man so in love with greed he has forgotten himself and found only appetites.”

“He makes my skin crawl… Some swarthy cocksucker… You know what I mean, friend?”

“If you’re a girl without means in this world, life is very scary…”

“She didn’t love enough, I guess… Or I wouldn’t change.”

“In these books, life seems so simple, but, in reality, I… I can’t make head nor tail of it.”

“Oh, I see that kindly face of yours and I know, for the right inducements, a gentleman such as yourself could be mighty kind.”

“Oh now, you keep saying that, but you don’t mean nothing by it.”

“She is driven by forces I scarcely understand…”

“That’s what love has done to her, I guess.”

“We each got….fifteen dollars. Oh, and a quarter… Don’t forget the quarter.”

“If there’s a problem, for me.”

“I thought you wasn’t getting involved.”

“We are gonna be harvesting mangoes in Tahiti.”

“You better be right about this one…”

“Have some goddamn faith.”

“I am bending over backwards to make a future for us!”

“There simply isn’t a reality in which we do nothing, and get everything.”

“I think he’ll be okay– if he don’t get a fever.”

“Well, he definitely lacks a certain charm.”

“Don’t you ever leave love aside, [Name], it’s all we got.”

“I possess things you will never understand.”

“Every plan is a good plan if we execute it properly.”

“I’m just trying to stay real about all this.”

“That is one of the most beautiful acts I ever saw.”

“An insect bit you or something? ‘Cause you gone, friend.”

“I will do whatever it takes for us to survive.”

“I still ain’t sure what you’re saying, [Name].”

“This feller is really beginning to try my patience.”

“Nobody knows who you are– not even your goddamn father.”

:We’ll find each other eventually. We always do.”

“My fair heart jumps for joy when I set eyes on you, [Name].”

“You can see why he has such a high opinion of himself.”

“I’ll wipe that goddamn smirk clean off your face.”

“You could’ve cleaned yourself up a bit.”

“I didn’t realize I was here to impress anyone.”

“Strangeness, I can handle– It’s the normal business of life I can’t seem to get a grip on.”

“You’re an idiot, but you’ll always be my friend.”

“Well, of course I’m your friend, but…you ain’t always fair with me.”

“If I was fair with you and a good person, I’d have had you hanged a long time ago.”

“So, shut up, and act like a gentleman… or at least try to for once in your brainless life.”

“It’s sort of beautiful, in a gaudy, and tasteless way…”

“Quite ridiculous, but somehow very amusing.”

“You can see why folks don’t wanna come around here– Ain’t exactly a welcoming place.”

“I don’t owe you nothing!”

“I loved you, you goddamn bastard!”

"She knew the rules, [Name]– What the hell is wrong with you?”

“You think I wanted to shoot her?!”

“I don’t know anymore… I’m not sure if I even care.”

“Well, the best thing is rest and getting somewhere warm and dry, and taking it easy.”

“We can’t change what’s done; we can only move on.”

“He didn’t have a choice, He was good and he did good.”

“I understand if you don’t wanna help me, but… but… I think of you often.”

“He’s quite the character; I think you’ll like him.”

“Y’know… I’m impressed. You’ve really stepped things up, ain’t you?”

“Hey, we didn’t know if you was even coming back.”

“You have a real habit of stating the obvious, [Name].”

“What the hell is wrong with you? I only left you an hour ago. You can’t stay out of trouble for one goddamn hour?”

“You got that poor bastard killed for his troubles– I kind of liked him!”

“Insist all you like; ain’t happening!”

“Well, I ain’t the crying sort, but, I’m real grateful!”

“This better not be no stupid revenge mission, [Name].”

“It’s just a simple social call.”

“So, what are we gonna say to him, that needs to be said?”

“This ain’t making a lot of sense, [Name].”

“Business doesn’t give two figs about feelings, sir. Not two figs.”

“Your impudence will be our undoing, sir.”

“Don’t play dumb and superior at the same time, [Name].”

“Feels like the whole world’s closing in on us.”

“Do you know who you’re talking to?”

“I think it’s a real bad idea.”

“See, I’m starting to think that you’ve gone soft, [Name].”

“So I was thinking, you go play dead, and I’ll take care of ‘em.”

“You play dead and I’ll cover you.”

“Nice shooting back there!”

“I could use a drink after that.”

“Listen… I know we ain’t always seen eye to eye, and…you find me irritating and a threat…and I like to annoy you…but right now I need better from you, [Name].”

“I ain’t the bad guy you think I am, [Name].”

“There’s a big picture here, [Name].”

“I feel like you should take your woman and child and get lost.”

“it’s that or…well, I don’t see no way outta this.”

“When the time comes, you gotta run and don’t look back.”

“That just ain’t how I wanna die.”

“You rally think that’ll draw attention away from us?”

“Y’know, all that ever mattered to me was loyalty. It was all I knew– It was all I ever believed in.”

“I’m seeing things a lot more clearly now.”

“I wish things were different… But it weren’t us who changed.”

“You don’t seem yourself somehow…”

“Surely this can be done without killing anyone?”

“We shoot fellers as need shooting, we save fellers as need saving, feed them as need feeding.”

“It’s been quite a while since we helped anyone, but ourselves, and even you know that.”

“I have a plan, you just have to trust me.”

“This is exactly the distraction we need.”

“Hey. Hey– you know I wasn’t gonna let it come to that.”

“I guess I don’t know what I know no more.”

“May God, in his infinite wisdom, have mercy upon your soul.”

“My whole life, I have tried to fight change.”

“Y’know, you and me… We’re more ghosts than people.”

“I miss him every day… every moment.”

“They turned me into a monster.”

“You’re the best man I’ve known.”

“I think I need to be alone for a bit.”

“Sometimes the correct path, the bravest path…is the least obvious, and also the gentlest.”

“My whole life I have tried to bring peace.”

We can talk if you want to, but don’t feel like you have to.”

“I should not have let you do this for me.”

“I hope you can find peace within yourself.”

“He’s a man who, not so long ago, I would have found weak and pathetic. Now I see as wise and thoughtful, and sensible.”

“We must act with due caution.”

“A failed man is often the most dangerous.”

“Hey, show some goddamn respect!”

“You’ll know when I ain’t showing respect.”

“I had a plan… I still have a plan!”

“I am tired of this constant dissent, long tired of it.”

“I’m gonna try and save him.”

“You’re quite the hero, ain’t you?”

“Come on… Don’t doubt me no more.”

“You saved my life more than once… To give mine for yours…it’s as it should be.”

“Everything is coming together exactly as I planned.”

“I’m afraid I have to insist.”

“Of course, pal… Whatever you think is best.”

“He insists upon it… Insists…”

“Don’t talk to me you son of a bitch.”

“Do it my way, honey. It’s for the best.”

“I’m gonna get you outta this bullshit if it’s the last goddamn thing I do.”

“It would mean a lot to me… Please…”

“You don’t know how much I’ve longed to do this.”

“All there is– winning…and losing…”

“In the end, despite my best efforts to the contrary, it turns out I’ve won.”

“I gave you all I had… I did.”

“I tried in the end… I did.”

“I ain’t too proud to do nothing.”

“I love you. Don’t you forget that– not ever now.”

“You stop acting like a goddamn storybook hero, will you?”

“I guess I was dreaming a little. At least give me that.”

“I did what I had to do to protect you.”

“I thought you was dead.”

“You know, speaking in monosyllables don’t make you seem interesting, it makes you seem stupid.”

“I never thought she was a smart woman, but this makes me think maybe I was wrong.”

“No, you’re stuck with me; seems I’m stuck with you.”

“Let’s just hope things don’t turn out like last time.”

“Now, you used to be decent company, but now, you’re worse than a snake with a toothache.”

“Get some self-respect you miserable sack of shit.”

“I just need a bit of peace and quiet from your incessant yapping.”

“That’s kind– unlikely to be taken up, but kind.”

“You always did have that fine way with words.”

“Do you wish I was more like you?”

“There’s a lot of ugly in this world, but there sure as hell is a lot of beauty.”

“Ain’t you just the leading authority on everything?”

“Sometimes, you just don’t know how things are gonna turn out.”

“I think I’m gonna ask her to, uh, marry me.”

“I never took you for a romantic.”

“It’s been ages since we spent any time together.”

“I hate to break it to you, but you ain’t that much to look at.”

“Why you being so courteous?”

“You’re acting kinda…funny.”

“You know, you’re not very nice to me.”

“Oh, I’m nicer than you deserve.”

“What’re you doing with that arm?”

“I thought you might be cold.”

“You’re acting real strange…”

“Will you marry me?”

“Shut up, you silly man, and kiss me!”

“You’re bleeding pretty bad.”