Alright HELLO

darnitcas

This is actually beautiful

teaching a shrimp how to read scripture through the tank. he hates it

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury- be honest, are you mad? Like are you guys mad at me?

do y'all also have mutuals whom you’re actually a fan of? like everytime u see them on your dash u just,,,,, “u go mutual that’s my mutual!!!!! i love u mutual!!!! i can’t even believe we’re mutuals i don’t deserve u!!!! keep being u mutual!!!”

my new years resolution is to get sillay

new years is gonna be the first wednesday of the 2020′s, my dudes

butt cheaks 4 sale.... never clapped..

Did you guys know Elon Musk sent that STUPID car into space without sterilizing it, and if it hadn’t gone off it’s intended path, and it had reached mars as he intended, it could have permanently ruined the search for life on Mars by contaminating the red planet with Musk‘s cooties. This may sound silly to you but I assure this is very real and serious. He could have ruined the entire field of astrobiology all for his stupid advertisement. Let’s kill him

Capitalist innovation ☺️

who’s the most traitorous bastard in your body? mine is probably my deltoid muscle 

do you think we get to learn everything when we die or are the colors that exist between colors gonna be shrimp-only knowledge forever

going to brine myself with sugar and salt, then hotbox my car with some nice alder wood chips to smoke myself like a salmon.... see you on the other side brother....