Gay alternative drunk liberal.

>ask a vendor if their crafts are real or slop

>she doesnt understand

>pull out illustrated diagram explaing what is real and what is slop

>she laughs and says “its good crafts maam"

>look at the stall

and those two moms eventually broke up while still sharing custody of her

and eventually both moms found new partners who also helped with parenting so she technically had 4 moms at one point

and i've known this for a while and it has meant nothing to me, but recently she dyed/bleached her hair a platinum blonde and ever since then i've been greeting her in the morning with a cordial "heyyy what's goin on?"

Waitress taking my order: Such arrogance! Not only do you presume to boast under the guise of being humble, but your order employs the most decadent of linguistic excesses - the tautology!

My date, who until recently thought "tautology" referred to the study of tensile strengths and upon learning her mistake compensated by reading through its Wikipedia article: That would be more correctly identified as a "pleonasm".

The editor I hired to curate my posts who styles himself as a sort of scheming court advisor: My liege, this one is getting away from us. The punchline loses much of its impact when the rest of the joke is derailed by this increasingly self-indulgent meta humour. Were it up to me, your Grace, which of course it is not, I would cut the others and leave myself as the only supporting character. You need noone else, Your Majesty...

who wants more rebel padmé au (me, the answer is me i want it)

1. this is not true

BOB's YOUR UNCLE!

Texts From Superheroes