their failure to allow mary a sense of individuality in this series is honestly insane. her husband raised their boys to think of her as an idol, immortalise her in a holy mary ideology, etc. and when she returns she learns pieces of this over a course of a few years … just to cry into this man’s shoulder when he’s brought back for a day?
mary was treated so unfairly as a result of john’s grief — when she didn’t fit this mold he made from her death, the boys even began to turn on her. of course she doesn’t know or understand why, and she has to live her life or a version of her life she doesn’t even want figuring this out from complete strangers — mostly ones that manipulate and borderline abuse her [the men of letters; ketch; bevell].
the LEAST mary deserved was a single swing on john. the LEAST she deserved was to fight for her own individuality and for her sons’ childhoods — all of which john robbed them of.