i write shitty fanfiction

There wasn’t much that Lohen couldn’t handle in his daily work. Take a letter to the Honorary Knight? Sure. Train the rookies in hand-to-hand combat? Bring it on. Face down the Wild Hunt in Nod-Krai? They’d better hope they didn’t land in his sights.

Talk to the cute librarian girl that had been running through his mind for the past week like its free real estate?

Pft. Talk about easy. No problemo. Certainly not a difficult task at all.

“Hello, Vice Captain,” you said, your eyes trained on his without a shred of hesitation. “Can I help you find something?”

“Find something?” he replied, blinking. Then, with a start, “Oh, you mean, like…like a book, right?”

You blinked. “Er, yes. This is a library, so…”

He heard the lilting of Lisa’s laughter behind him, but when he whipped around to glare at her, she casually strode out of earshot. Her heels clicked into the upper floor, punctuating Lohen’s excruciatingly long, stifling silence.

His plan had been simple: walk into the library and just talk to you. He figured the rest would come naturally, like how his instincts took hold of him in the middle of a fight, telling him how to move, and when to do it. Lohen was not a coward, and he wasn’t scared of you, so talking to you should have been easy. Light work. As simple as breathing.

Still, he was fumbling.

“A book,” he said, one corner of his mouth curling up in an awkward smile. “I mean, I don’t…I don’t really read, so…I dunno.”

Fuck, fuck, fuck—why was that the best he could manage? Why did he sound like such a bumbling idiot?

Your expression turned grave. Clutching your book to your chest, you said, “Please don’t tell me you’re here to pull a prank on me. Or to poison me. Or whatever else it is that you torment the others with.”

“What?” he asked, wincing. “No, I’m not here for that. Trust me—if I wanted to poison you, you’d be vomiting your guts out in medical by now!”

He laughed, but you didn’t. Perhaps he had stuck his foot in his mouth with that one, because you withdrew even further into yourself, your jaw unhinged. Your eyes were flicking between him and the staircase, like you were trying to find a route for escape.

While he kinda didn’t mind that, it definitely wasn’t his intention. Snapping his cackling maw shut, he felt his throat squeeze.

“A book,” he sputtered. “I’m here for a book.”

“O…kay…” you replied slowly. “Um…what kind of book…?”

(Think, Lohen, think. You haven’t read anything since your parents forced those fairytale books on you when you were a kid. If you go saying something like ‘The Belle and the Behemoth’, she’ll laugh at you. That wouldn’t be cool at all, so think, goddammit, think. Something cool!)

“Sex,” he blurted. “A book about sex. ‘Cause I’m, like…the sex master. Yeah.”

You looked embarrassed. “I’m…afraid we don't have any books like that here, Vice Captain…”

“Oh.” He crossed his arms over his chest, pensive. What else was he a self-proclaimed master of? “Murder?”

“Are you referring to murder mystery novels?”

“Huh? No, like, a book on murder. As in, how to do it. Preferably detailing various methods.”

You winced. “We don’t have books like that either…”

“What?” he replied, one eye twitching. “How boring. What the hell do you guys even have, then?”

“Um, normal books?” You flipped the book in your grasp around, showing him the title. “For example, this is a fictional novel titled Fate’s Glimmer. It's the long-awaited series of an Inazuman author who’s been quite popular in Mondstat as of late. It’s new, so I ordered it to be expressly delivered from Yae Publishing House, and I—. Um.”

You hesitated, your eyes falling to your desk. Repeatedly, you tapped your thumbs together over your bridged hands.

“Sorry, I’m oversharing. And we honestly have more nonfiction than fiction, so…I probably should have started with that.”

Halfway through your ramble, Lohen’s heart had started to act up. It was pounding like it did when he was on the battlefield, cutting down foe after foe with each swing of his lance—not like he was attempting to communicate with a pretty girl in the Mondstat Library. Why did he feel such strain? Furthermore, why did that strain come with such joy?

He turned away from you, a light touch of warmth settling across his face. He lifted a finger, pointing at the book in your hands. “Do you…have any other copies of that one?”

“Of…of Fate’s Glimmer? You…want to read it?”

He chanced a glance back your way, but he really shouldn’t have. You were beaming from ear-to-ear, your teeth poking through your radiant smile, and with your big, shimmering eyes, you said, “I actually ordered two copies! Just in case anyone else wanted to read it at the same time as me! It’s really good, I swear!”

He was having palpitations. Stammering through his sentence, he replied, “U-um, I, uh, yeah! Yeah, I…definitely wanna read that. Fate’s Shimmer…or whatever it is.”

“Glimmer,” you corrected him, still smiling. “Here, I’ll check out a copy for you right now. Do you have your Knights’ ID on you?”

“Uh, yeah. Here.”

The way your fingers brushed his sent a chill down his spine. Odd, considering that he was rarely susceptible to the cold.

“Here you are, Vice Captain,” you said, holding out a thick book between both hands. “You’ll have to swing by from time to time and let me know what you think of it.”

Swing by from time to time? Wait, did that mean you wanted to see him again? Wait—that meant you were totally into him, weren’t you?

“Heh.” Lohen cracked a grin. “Guess I’ll come by again later, then. Since you asked, and all.”

“That would be wonderful! I’m so curious to hear your thoughts on Act One…there’s such a massive cliffhanger at the end of it! Ah, but I won’t spoil anything.” You smiled, your long lashes fluttering over your bright eyes. Ever so cutely, you said, “Come back soon, won’t you, Vice Captain?”

Lohen was deceased where he stood.

Another routine patrol in Windrise had somehow led him straight into you—and the pack of hilichurls encroaching upon you.

You yelped as you scrambled backwards across the grassy field, your novel splitting open beside you. There was fear in those eyes of yours, which took in the horde before you like they were harbingers of doom. The vision on your hip glinted in the sunlight, but for some reason, you were far too petrified to make use of your only weapon. Ordinarily, a sight like yours would have annoyed Lohen more than anything—what a weak woman—but something about the situation felt just right.

With a chuckle, he crossed the field, brandishing his lance before him. One stroke annihilated the hilichurl in front of you. The second struck the two flanking the first. And on the last stroke, hilichurl blood sprayed into the void, both archers befelled by a single strike. Such easy, light work, yet you weren’t even capable of it. Surely you’d look upon him with admiration, as the valiant knight who came to your rescue.

“Good thing I got here before things took a turn for the worse!” he chirped, pushing his hair back with a rake of his hand. “Not that I would have minded getting the chance to see you beg and plead for your life.”

You gawked at him, your eyes wide. He blinked, his chuckles dying in the wind.

“What?” he asked. “It’s not an insult. I mean…you’d probably look good doing it.”

His face burned, but your silence persisted. You had the same look in your eyes that you had worn when the hilichurls ambushed you, but this time, it was directed at him. Lohen watched as you scrambled further backwards, your dress skirts dragging along the grass beneath you.

 “I-I’m not a strong person, you know?!” you squeaked. “Even if you try threatening me…I doubt I could give you the kind of fight you’d enjoy!”

“Wh—? I’m not threatening you! I’m giving you a compliment!”

“Please!” you wailed, your hands pressed to your head, tucking your face towards your knees. “I just wanted to read in peace!”

“What are you getting all freaked out for?” Lohen scoffed. “The hilichurls are dead! Now you can read Fate’s Shimmer all you want.”

“Glimmer!”

“Er, yeah. That.” He lifted his hand to the back of his neck, rubbing awkwardly. “Jeez…would it calm you down if I told you I read the first couple of chapters?”

Immediately, your head sprung up from your hiked knees. Your eyes were wide, and in only a second, it was as though you had no recollection of the panicked state you were in before. You scooped your book out of the grass, smiling from ear to ear, and patted the space beside you.

He looked from your hand to your face repeatedly. Jubilant, you said, “Sit down, then! I want to hear what you think about it so far.”

“Wh…huh?” He pressed his pointer finger to his chest. “You want me…to sit with you?” His eyes flicked upwards. “Under this…giant tree? With…with all the crystalflies floating around and everything?”

“Why, it’s the best place to sit in all of Mondstat. It’s perfect for reading—and for discussions about what we’ve read.”

The way you smiled was wrapping his throat tighter than the choker around his neck. He pulled at it a bit, and blamed the heat bathing his cheeks on the blazing sun overhead. Perhaps in response to his desperation, he was blessed by an incoming bout of pure anemo.

Dandelion spores washed through the air. They danced along the wind, and as they floated around your face, surrounding you like a feathery halo, you grinned with your teeth and laughed.

His heart was doing that irrational pounding again. Like he hadn’t just fought some low-level churls. Like he was in Nod-Krai, fighting with Varka and the others, half-conscious and two wrong steps away from death.

A spore flew into Lohen’s nose.

“Achoo!”

His shoulders jerked with his sneeze. He sniffled, rubbing his finger under his dripping nose, and you ever so sweetly said, “Bless you.”

He was suffocating and suffering cardiovascular collapse at the same time. Ironically, it felt kinda good.

“Come on,” you said, your hand still extended beside you. “Sit with me, won’t you, Vice Captain?”

He swallowed.

“Just call me Lohen.”

He wasn’t expecting to come across you in Varka’s office of all places.

“—please?” you were saying when Lohen opened the door. “I really want to see the flora for myself! It would help me visualize it so much better!”

Varka was grimacing. When he and Lohen met eyes, the Grand Master perked up and lifted a hand in greeting.

“Hey, Lohen!” he exclaimed. “You actually came like I asked you to! Good job, sport!”

Lohen rolled his eyes, but he was more focused on you than Varka. You were wringing your hands together, your shoulders rife with tension. Just like always, you had that thick novel of yours at your hip.

“Sorry,” you said. “I know you’re busy, Varka. It’s a silly request anyway, so I’ll just go.”

“Wait,” Lohen said, turning to track you as you made for the door. “Library girl. What were you two talking about?”

He didn’t really care that you had made a request of Varka and not of him, but he still wanted to know. For some reason.

“Oh, I…” You looked back at Varka, then at Lohen. Shaking your head, you said, “Don’t worry about it, Vice Captain. It sounds like you two have a pre-arranged meeting, so…I won’t interrupt you.”

“The meeting can wait,” Lohen said, following you out the door (which prompted a loud “Hey!” from Varka). “And didn’t I tell you to just call me Lohen?”

“You…did,” you mumbled. “Sorry, I’m just not used to it. I never really call anyone by name.”

His brows furrowed. “But you just called the Grand Master ‘Varka’.”

“Um. Yes.”

You continued pacing towards the library, and blatantly on the pursuit, Lohen followed you. As you both crossed the headquarter’s main foyer, one behind the other, Lohen could feel the stares and hear the whispers.

“Should we help her…?” someone mumbled.

Ignoring them, Lohen asked, “Why are you running away from me?”

“I’m not,” you said, but the way your shoulders were up by your ears as your heels played staccato beats across the floor told a different story. “I’m just getting back to work.”

Lohen’s eyes narrowed. His gaze fell to your swinging arms, and when you tried to escape behind a bookcase, he grabbed your wrist.

You stopped suddenly, turning to look at him with wide eyes. His hand burned around your wrist, like you were possessed by the power of pyro. Quickly, he released you.

“...Sorry,” he said. “Seriously, though, what were you trying to say back there? Something about flora?”

“It’s silly,” you replied quickly. “It doesn’t matter. I don’t want to bug you with something like this, Vice Captain—.”

“Lohen.”

“...Lohen.”

It fell from your lips, soft. It tickled the rims of his ears. You glanced up at him, rubbing your arm.

“It’s really childish,” you said. “And it would be a waste of the Knights of Favonius’s resources. I only asked Varka because I knew he wouldn’t laugh at me.”

“I’m not gonna laugh at you.”

Hesitation was written clearly across your face. After a beat, you visibly swallowed.

“I…want to go to Dragonspine,” you explained to him. “I’ve gotten to Act Two of Fate’s Glimmer, and it takes place in a snowy region similar to it. There’s some descriptive bits of ecology that I can’t quite picture, so I was hoping that if I went and saw it…I would be a little more immersed.”

Your voice fell to a mumble by the end of your sentence. Lohen raised an eyebrow.

“You went to the Grand Master of the Knights of Favonius…because you wanted to see flowers in Dragonspine?”

You buried your face in your palms. “This is why I didn’t want to tell you, Vice Captain.”

“Stop calling me that,” he groaned. “And I’m not laughing at you, am I? I’m just trying to figure out where Varka fits into this.” He paused. “You…seeing him or something?”

“Huh?” You looked up from your hands with a wince. “No, no—what? Varka’s practically like a father to me. Or…maybe an older brother. I’ve known him for a long time, that's all.”

“Oh. I see.” Lohen crossed his arms. “So…flowers in Dragonspine. You couldn’t even fight to save your life back in Windrise. Don’t think much would change over some flowers.”

“That’s why I was asking Varka,” you mumbled. “But he’s really busy. So is Lisa. And I don’t know the other knights well enough to have the courage to ask…”

“I’ll go with you.”

Silence fell between you both. The longer you stared at him, the hotter Lohen’s face became.

“What, you don’t want me to?” he asked. “‘Cause I’m a busy guy and all, so—.”

“No, no!” You held your hands out, taking a step towards him. Your eyes held fast to his as you said, “I’m just…really happy that you would offer.”

Someone really needed to open a window in the library or something, because all of a sudden it was stifling. Awkwardly, Lohen laughed and threw his gaze to the books that encased you.

“I just think it would be interesting,” he chattered. “Seeing you running around in the snow. Getting chased by monsters, I mean. Probably even begging me to help you…haha…”

Slowly, he pressed his palm to his smoldering face. The image of you running from a cryo abyss mage with your book clutched to your chest, wailing for him to save you, was a bit more enticing than he had thought it would be.

“…I’m so determined to go that I’ll choose to ignore that. When are you free?”

“When do you want to go?” he said, to the books.

“How does tomorrow sound?”

“Lohen—tomorrow I want you to lead the training exercises for the rookies in the 7th Company—.”

“Tomorrow sounds great,” he said, waving the echo of Varka’s voice from his mind. “Yep. I’m totally free.”

“R-really?” You were smiling again, wrecking his heart again. “Then…let’s go! It’ll be great for you too, so that when you get to Act Two, you’ll know exactly what the flowers look like.”

Staring into your eyes, he mumbled, “Yeah…I bet they’re pretty.”

“Me too!”

Snapping out of his deluge, Lohen stood upright again. Taking stilted steps to face away from you, he rather stiffly said, “Meet me here at nine, then. Don’t be late, or I’ll set a trap for you at every step of the way in Dragonspine. And trust me—you wouldn’t like that!”

“I’ll be here,” you replied, your voice warm. “Thank you again, Vice—...Lohen.” You laughed. “Thanks, Lohen.”

With his ears burning hot, he gave you a curt nod.

You stood in a field of tiny blue flowers, and with your hands cupped around a cluster of luminescent bulbs, you said, “They’re beautiful.”

Lohen stared after your back, watching the sway of your hair in the frigid winds. You turned to face him with a smile hotter than crimson agate, warming straight through his core when you asked, “Don’t you think so, Lohen?”

“...Yeah,” he said, his eyes flicking away from yours. “Really beautiful.”

“I can see how this would have laid such a romantic scene for the main characters. As gelid as these winds are, and as withered as the trees appear to be…there are still intimate spots of beauty like this.” You grinned. “It’s fascinating, isn’t it?”

“Mhm. Something like that.”

You laughed, kneeling down to observe the flowers. The fact that such a simple, boring thing could bring so much joy to your face was oddly…humbling. He struggled to understand whether you acted this way because of your weakness, or if finding pleasure in the banal was instead your strength.

Wooo…

An increasingly cold wind swept by, and by the sound of its pitch, Lohen could sense danger on the horizon. Immediately on high alert, he brandished his lance, his eyes navigating the thickening snow for the source of the threat.

“Library girl,” he said. “Get up.”

“Huh? Is something wrong—?”

“Oh shit,” he said, his eyes widening. “Run, run, run!”

As he tackled into you, hooking his arm under yours to pull you along, you let out a surprised yelp. The thickening snow was approaching faster, and by the timbre of the wind accompanying it, he could tell that a wave of white-out was about to occur. This far into the mountains with you, he didn’t have the luxury to enjoy battling the stinging cold and burying himself out of avalanches with his bare hands. Not when you were involved.

He practically dragged you into a nearby cave, lurching into a dark and cavernous space that was just big enough for the two of you. You stumbled onto your hands and knees when he stopped, your back heaving up and down with air-starved breaths.

“You…! You run really fast…!”

He winced. “Er. Sorry?”

“It’s…it’s okay.” You rolled over into a sitting position, sighing. “Though I can’t lie…I nearly had a heart attack when you told me to run. It’s not like you to sound so scared about something.”

Scared? He hadn’t felt anything similar to fear in a long time. He just didn’t like the thought of losing you in the middle of a snowstorm, you with your vision, which was practically just an accessory for you. A pretty one that complimented your skin, but still.

With a grunt, Lohen lowered himself to the ground beside you. Outside the hollow of the cave, the snow piled faster than torrential rain. As he watched it fall, he propped his chin in his hand. Taking a glance at you, he said, “We’ll just have to lay low for a while. Once the blizzard passes, we’ll head for the foot of the mountain.”

You nodded. Content with that, Lohen turned his focus to the mouth of the cave once more.

And then it was quiet. Just you and him, sitting beside each other in the snug little cave, silent. As time stretched on, a gnawing feeling ate away at him like a munching caterpillar. He drummed his fingers against his knee, tried to focus on the petrous patterns of the walls. Anything to distract himself.

“...Phoo,” you breathed all of a sudden.

Lohen turned, and as soon as he took you in, his eyes widened. Your body was trembling as you wrapped your arms around your legs, your teeth chattering audibly against the hollow walls of the cave. He glanced at the snowstorm outside, then back at you, and acutely realized that you did not possess his nigh-invincible level of immunity to the cold.

Quietly, he slipped his coat off his shoulders, taking his cape alongside it. Quieter still, he dumped it into your lap. When you looked up at him, he tried not to return your gaze, lest the flames in his cheeks decide to smolder any hotter.

He heard the rustle of fabric. Out of the corner of his eye, he watched you lay his coat over top of yourself.

“Thank you,” you murmured.

He turned his head even further, smirking at the wall. “No big deal.”

“How are you so unfazed by this? It’s f-freezing.”

“Uh, cryo vision, remember?”

“W-well yes, but still.” You shuddered, letting a breath out with it. “I have a vision, but…it doesn’t make me any less sensitive to my element.”

“Probably ‘cause you never even use it,” Lohen drawled. Turned away from you like this, it was a bit easier to talk to you. “Got blessed by the Gods and you spend all your time reading novels. Isn’t that boring?”

“Hm…let me ask you the same question, then. You spend all your time playing tricks on your colleagues and eliminating the enemy, yes? Don’t you find it boring to not have…well…a real hobby?”

“Huh? Those are totally real hobbies, though.”

“I’m quite sure if we went around asking the other knights what their hobbies are,” you laughed, “they would not include poisonings and murder. Aside from that, what do you like to do, Lohen?”

He tapped his finger against his cheek repeatedly, frowning at the wall. If you took away his tasteful pranks and his insatiable bloodlust, then he was left with…

“Well,” he stammered. “Uh. I guess…I did read a bit of that book. So reading?”

“As happy as I am that you’ve made progress, I think it’s a bit early to label that as a hobby.”

His brows furrowed. “What do you even consider a hobby?”

“Something you do for fun. But, it’s also something you can do with others. Safely.”

“I always see you reading by yourself, though.”

You let out a close-lipped laugh. He heard you shuffling, then felt the warmth of your arm against his. Quickly, his head snapped to yours, and with your arms poking out through the gaps of his coat, thick novel bound to both hands, you asked, “Why don’t we read together, then?”

“Wait. Slow down.”

A laugh. “You can’t handle this?”

“Fuck no. Just slow down.”

Lohen’s brows were furrowed, his eyes struggling to absorb the text as fast as yours were. You laughed when you reversed the page, bringing him back to the sentence he was at before your rude interruption. He lifted his finger to the paper, mumbling the words under his breath as he searched for the right paragraph.

“...Ah,” he said. “That one.”

“Oh, that’s when the heroine meets the male lead. You like that part?”

“Well. Kinda.” Lohen shrugged. “He’s, like, a super cool war general, right? Stronger than a thousand troops.”

Your smile curled further upwards. “He is. I suppose he does sound like your kind of character.”

“...What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing,” you answered. “Just that, well. You’re an incredibly strong man yourself. In a way, you remind me of him.”

“...Oh, yeah? What kinda way?”

You blinked, and ever so quickly, snapped your head away from his. Stammering, you said, “N-nevermind.”

“Huh?” Lohen raised an eyebrow. “Wait…are you embarrassed?”

“No,” you said stiffly.

He smirked. “Looks like you’re embarrassed to me. You thinking something weird about me, library girl?”

“N-no,” you repeated, shaking your head. “And please stop calling me library girl.”

“But you never told me your name, library girl.”

“Ugh, I…” You brought a hand to your head, rubbing it furiously. “It’s because it’s embarrassing. Actually, you know what? Just keep calling me library girl.”

“Well, now I really wanna know.” He pressed closer to you, his shoulder touching yours. “What’s your name?”

“Library girl,” you mumbled.

“As far as I can tell, this snowstorm isn’t stopping any time soon. You really think you can get away with keeping your little secret until it stops?”

“I can try.”

“I doubt you’ll be very successful.”

Your eyes flicked to his. He froze where he sat, realizing just how close your faces had become. This close to you, he could count each and every one of those pretty eyelashes you had, take note of the exact millimeter measurements of your round pupils.

You looked conflicted about it, but after a brief pause, you acceded to his request.

“It’s not the name I go by,” you said in a mumble. “It just happens to be my Mondstatian one. My parents believed in Barbatos’s principle of giving children the freedom to name themselves…so I was hardly old enough to speak when I picked it.”

“Hm. Sounds like a bad idea.”

“It really was. Because I was so young, I decided I wanted to be called…”

You said it, but it was in such a low mutter that he had to crane his ear closer. Brows furrowed, he said, “Huh?”

“B…” You were sheepish. “Bun…ny.”

Lohen’s eyes widened.

“You’re fucking with me.”

“This is why I don’t tell anyone—.”

“You went and named yourself ‘Bunny’?” he asked, snorting. “You mean you have to sign that on your papers and everything every time you want to travel? Stamp all your official letters with it? That’s hilarious!”

“I know!” you complained, your brows furrowed. “You don’t have to remind me!”

“Sorry, that’s just…!” He leaned his head back, laughing. “It’s just so ridiculous! I can’t believe anyone would let their kid name themselves that!”

You let out a groan, plopping your face into your palms. Glaring at the mouth of the cave, you growled, “Why did I even tell you?”

Lohen’s laughs slowed down, and with a swipe of his finger under his eyes, he brought his amused tears away. Observing your frustrated expression with a smile, he scoffed through his nose.

“Oh, don’t be so embarrassed about it. Everyone I know loves bunnies! Especially me.”

You shot him a look, then shuffled a touch away from him. When he realized how honestly he had spoken, his cheeks flared with warmth.

“I didn’t mean it like that,” he said, the corner of his grin twitching. “Don’t look at me like I’m a weirdo.”

You shuffled even further. Obstinately, he shuffled right back next to you.

“I thought you were cold,” he said.

“I’m very much warm now, thank you.”

“Then can I have my coat back?”

“...No.”

You didn’t move away from him this time. That fact alone gave him goosebumps—and also went straight to his head.

“Aren’t I warm?” he murmured, ignoring the flames that erupted in his face because of it. “Huh, Bunny?”

You went ramrod stiff. He adored that.

“Bunny,” he drawled. “Silence isn’t exactly an answer, you know?”

“Wh-what is wrong with you?” you asked. “Is this…your way of messing with me?”

“Huh. Well, I guess it’s one of the only ways I can. You’d probably die of a heart attack if I tried anything else. You know, just like how bunnies fall over at any and everything.”

“I wish I never told you,” you said, your eyes pressed closed. “I really wish I never did.”

“Definitely going to use it to mess with you from now on.”

“I can see that.”

He snorted. “Guess some things are better kept a secret, huh?”

You paused. Turning those eyes of yours onto his, the ones that he’d study forever if you’d let him, you softly said, “No, it’s only fair. It’s easier to communicate when I know your name and you know mine.”

Easier to communicate, huh?

He had only just realized it, but he was cracking jokes and talking to you like normal now. Was this sense of closeness brought on by Dragonspine, which forced even the most seasoned of adventurers to form alliances to weather its storms? Was it a fleeting moment of warmth, a kindle of flame that would extinguish underneath the thick blanket of snow as soon as you parted ways? What was this feeling in his chest that plucked his heart strings, that made him feel nothing but a hollow ache when he thought of leaving you?

“...Are you scared?”

Your voice cut through the silence. You lifted a hand, hesitated, then slowly placed it over top of his.

“Wh…what,” he sputtered, his arm stiffening, “are you doing? I’m not fucking scared. I’m the Vice Captain of the 5th Company, remember? I’m practically stronger than a whole platoon.”

“This part of you reminds me of the character in the novel,” you murmured. Your hand rubbed the back of his, wringing a strangled noise from his throat. “When confronted with fear…challenged by an invisible threat that you can’t wrap your hands around…you try to flee. You’re not very honest with yourself, are you, Lohen?”

Your hand was on his. This was what he wanted, wasn’t it? For you to touch him and talk to him like you were his? Why did he feel so bittersweet about how it was proceeding?

He blurted his thoughts as they occurred. “I’m embarrassed as shit. I was hoping this would be…that I’d be cooler. But I think I’m gonna have a stroke if you keep touching me.”

“Aren’t I warm, though?” you crooned back, your mockery setting him ablaze. “Huh, Lohen?”

“Fuck,” he stammered, pressing his palm to his face. “You’re as much of a little shit as I am.”

You laughed. “That’s a good thing then, isn’t it? Maybe you and I aren’t so different after all.”

Your fingers curled through the gaps of his. His shoulders jumped, but you squeezed hard.

“Thanks for taking me to Dragonspine,” you said. “It was very kind of you.”

He had no words. All Lohen could manage was a stilted nod of his head.

“Want to read some more?” you asked. “You turn the pages this time?”

“...Sure,” he mumbled.

You brought the novel back, flipping it open and bracing it halfway on your leg, halfway on his. With your hands still joined, you used your left to manipulate the pages, and with Lohen’s right, he smoothed the bunny ear in the paper back into place.

The snow outside fell soft now, the blizzard having ended long ago. Still remaining side by side in the intimacy of that bountiful cave, you continued to enjoy each other’s company as though you had all the time in the world.

For the first time in a long time, Lohen didn’t mind taking things slow and easy. Not when it was something he could enjoy with you.

Lohen’s eyes are still fixed on you.

— I’ll take the camp in the south. Gather the forces to deal with what is being raised in the north. If Varka has problems in the southwest, I’ll get there in time to solve the problem.

Well, at least Lohen was listening to every word of the conversation.

☆ Absolutely: an eagle eye on you while you go on with your tasks during the day. He absorbs the details about you and still does what he needs to do naturally.

Discreet and efficient.

Fast and effective.

☆ Once, you crossed paths in one of the hallways. He was leaving a meeting with Varka, you were entering to deliver some papers.

Trying to make space for Lohen and two other knights to pass, you bumped into the nearby furniture and the decorative vase wobbled.

It was already halfway to the floor and you were already expecting the loud crash of shards when... Nothing.

With grace and agility, Lohen reaches the vase and returns it to its place as if his reflexes were a mere triviality.

He greeted you with an ironic comment without being cruel — not as he could be. What Lohen expects — with his attentive gaze — is your reaction: he wants to know if you get embarrassed or feel confronted, if he hits your pride or some insecurity.

He amuses himself even more if you try to hide any reaction, if you try to act indifferent or merely “professional.”

Lohen sees through your mask and is satisfied by being able to penetrate your social defenses.

☆ He questions himself deeply about why he is so interested in you if you are... Normal.

If he has to spend five more minutes observing you while you have done nothing interesting all day besides solving everyday situations, Lohen feels like he will doze off from boredom leaning against that very post.

He forces himself to leave, but it irritates him how much effort he needed to make — a part of Lohen seemed willing to suffer deep boredom in exchange for being able to continue contemplating you.

☆ Lohen may, until then, not have gone after you; he believes he has no reason to distract himself with you and these feelings while there is an entire world of enemies to hunt out there.

☆ Please, let a romantic interest appear in your life. Lohen will love having a “rival” to compete against.

It certainly would not be a competition to win you over — not directly, not intentionally.

Maybe he does not have much to do at first, especially if the guy is only an ordinary civilian; but things change in tone if that guy joins the Knights of Favonius: Lohen will certainly have a new target to experiment with.

☆ (The deepest part of him wishes that you would see and witness his true personality in action, at its peak — and not run away. However, this early on, he does not want to scare you)

Lohen will play with you and test you, and infiltrate your life without formally asking permission, but every step is calculated, both in how much he shows you and in how much he allows you to see.

☆ You will know that Lohen has a different or exclusive interest in you when you notice that he always opens doors for you when he has the chance.

But only for you.

Any other person who comes right after you, Lohen pretends not to have seen: he closes the door immediately — and, depending on who it is, he may still make an ironic comment about that person not paying attention or not having enough reflexes to deal with a door.

At that moment, the smile he gives you is gentle. And when he opens his eyes as he turns his back and leaves, the reddish glow in his irises is intense enough to cause a shiver of worry in your conscience — it is like the gaze of a beast circling its prey in the middle of the night, undecided whether such interest is hunting instinct from hunger or a threatened ego.

"Lohen! Why– why did you do that?" You exclaim, confused and exhalted.

His hand was still on your face, squshing your chin and cheeks.

"Oh, now now, since when are you so jumpy? Relax, relax... did you know kissing on both cheeks is a fontanian custom? Besides, i'm pretty sure we're close enough."

You could only grumble at his response.

Or another time. You're half-covered in mud, after a rough sparring session. Somehow, he convinces you to shower at the Favonius headquarters. Alone, with him, in light clothing while he scrubs the mud away.

To be fair, you were pretty tired.

His hands, covered in shampoo tug lightly at your hair.

"Hey– quit stuggling, mudhead."

You can only hum in response, and lightly grab his wrist. He tugs your hair harder, you let out a wince and finally stay still.

"Ah, finally. Wasn't that hard, mhm? Now, now... let me wash your arms.."

The shower was hot and pleasant. He tended to you countless times after, until it turned into a habit. Until he got to a step closer of getting you used to being his.

Courting phaseೃ⁀➷

Lohen's couting is... weird.

He's mostly like a loyal dog who wouldn't leave your side. I think that his preferred love language would be Acts of Service.

So he would always be present. At your side, tugging at your clothes, whispering in your ear; "what can i do for you?"

He also likes to kiss your hands, a lot. Too much.

It's morning, you're heading to the Favonius headquarters. You come in, ready to face the day ahead with a grin on your face... before you spot him in the distance.

You heart stops for a bit– you clear your throat and slowly aproach to Lohen.

Once you're close, you wave at him, "Hello Lohen, how do you find yourself today?" You're all warm and nice. But you let out a gasp when he grabs your hands with both of his; his gloves are cold, extremely so against your warm hands.

"Mhm... morning." He barely murmurs, as he bows down his head to kiss your knuckles. They're brief, small kisses, but too much of them. They're starting to make your hands tickle and your face go red. But he doesn't stop.

Instead, he lifts up both of your sleeves and leaves kisses on the inside of your wrists.

All of this lasts for about some good 30 seconds or so. And It's daily. Everytime he spots you, he goes in and kisses your hands; fervently so.

And, oh, remember that clothing you say you liked but couldn’t get because it was too expensive? It's at your door the next day. Along with a bouquet of flowers and a small note that says:

"Just a small gift; i could've delivered the Mitachurl's horn of which i killed yesterday, but i'd figure you'd like this more."

"From Lohen♡"

Dating hcs ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

Once you two starts dating, he announces it to the Heavenly Principles. If you want it to be private it's not going to be sorry lil bro.

He tells it to everyone. Jean, Diluc, Klee, Venti, Donna, Huffman–

"Hey... guess who's dating __? Me!"

"Oh, good for you, man."

"HaHA! Guess what? I'm dating __!"

"Wait weren't you already dating–?"

"Guess what!? I asked __ to be my partner! They said YES!"

"Uhm... okay, sir— are you gonna order anything?"

"Guess who's __'s boyfriend? THIS lucky bastard!"

The hilichurl can only tilt its head before being mercilessly assasinated

Also, he starts to bite you. A lot.

It's somewhat possesive, not necessarily sexual. He bites your cheek. And when he's behind you, he likes to bite down your shoulder or your head. If you're taller, he'll stand on his tippy toes.

It's kind of funny tho. It doesn't even hurt, it leves a mark for about a minute and then It's gone.

If you ask him about it; he'll say he doesn't even know why he does it.

And i've seen a lot of people hc'ing him to get cuteness overload, and that It's ABSOLUTELY CORRECT. I love that.

Your cheek are suddenly squished in between his hands as he talks sweetly to you.

"Awh, such a pretty, little thing... so squishy and adorable. For Barbatos, if Jean wasn't staring at us, i would completely eat you up."

It's not just your face either. Everypart of you that he can squish and touch; he will. You're just so adorable to him, he just wants to eat you up... cutely!

Lastly; petnames!

I think he would call you bunny, or really cutesy names in that part. Also call you, Lord/Lady, or just a cute little thing.

But the most precious one of them is calling you a beauty.

In his mind, you're perfect, and oh so pure. He knows he can tend to be cruel; somewhat of a beast even; to some people. Therefore, you get to be his treasure, his beauty.

≡;- ꒰ ° NSFW hcs ꒱

(i know you were all waiting for this, you freaks)

I think that the first time with Lohen was ABSOLUTELY terrifying. For you, obviously. Because it's... Lohen, he's weird.

He talked. He teased. He joked about playing you around with his knives, but the first time.. he did nothing of that.

Lohen may be a sadist, but he would wait until you gave him consent to be like... weird in bed, i guess.

I don't think he would have a high libido. You two don't have s!x often, but when you have, YOU HAVE. And It's never with a notice.

His favorite place to do it is always in the bedroom, it's very comfortable for both of you to enjoy without judgement. But when he really is needy, he'll just do it in the Favonius headquarters. His treatment; his office.

His stamina is high, very high so. He can go multiple rounds without breaking a sweat.

Having s!x with Lohen is really fast. Not because he comes quickly but because he DOESN'T FUCKING STOP. The only reason he stops for is because of your various whines and protests for a break.

I don't think he is necessarily a top. I think he's just a dominant switch.

Also, remember the bite thing i said before? Yeah, he does it, a lot. Mostly on your neck, thighs and chest.

After care ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ-

He doesn't do a great aftercare. After doing it multiple times, he draps you in a comfy blanket and lets you fall asleep next to him.

Nothing much out of the normal. But the aftercare comes the whole week after.

The week/a few days after, he is SO giddy with you. He doesn't talk to you with that sadistic smile he had, he greets you like that and is always with that giddy grin. Especially the first time.

He buys you a new set of clothes, buys you drinks, sneaks out at work just to see you. Even when he's fighting, he's not necessarily not enjoying you, but now his malicious laughter is replaced by small giggles.

When you first got recruited to the Knights of Favonius and got assigned to the fifth company, Varka made sure to introduce you and Lohen to each other. Your good first impression of him lasted for about 5 minutes.

You really wish you knew the reason, because it seemed like he immediately associated you to one of those stupid aiming targets all the way back to Dornman port after your first interaction—in simple words—He made annoying you his brand-new favorite hobby, right next to fighting.

And it certainly didn't take long for you to find out just how creative he is; walking around the woods (or anywhere really) made you feel like an animal being hunted, there was always a trap...from him, of course.

Funnily enough, you ended up falling for one of his traps while walking around and thinking of ways to avoid them this morning. So there you were; hanging upside down, tied to the most obvious trap to ever exist. Congratulations!

But you knew he was around. No matter how sneaky the vice-captain is, you taught yourself to feel his presence after so many nearly murder attempts.

“ LOHEN!! ” You yelled, dragging the 'O' of his name while going back and forth in the air to try to get out of that stupid tree.. Not the best idea, since you'd still be tied and probably fall head first on the floor.

Either way, his laugh echoed, and the unfortunately-familiar figure showed up from.. Wherever he'd been hiding. There was too much blood going straight to your head for you to actually tell any directions.

“Avoiding the well-hidden ones and falling for the obvious ones..” Lohen said while recovering from the early laughter from his part. And his part only, since you were glaring at him without moving a single facial muscle. “Aww, don't get all that mad..see, you improved!"

“Put me down!”

"Nah..i think you'll be fine here for a few more minutes."

You made a weird noise, a mix of a growl and whine while pressing your eyelids together. Only when you opened your eyes again did you notice his face right in front of yours.

You hated how good looking that guy was.

Because.. What a wasted potential! His eyes specially. If you looked at Lohen from afar, you'd just find his eyes scary; they really did screamed and warned you from a mile away that he was not right in the head. But looking at them from this close.. You even forgot that it was the guy you hated so much for a second.

But only for a second, because then you blinked and saw that stupid grin on his face. You gathered impulse and pushed your upper body forward to free yourself.

You heard and the rope break, your body floating for a second before falling. You absolutely were going head first on the ground...

“oh, nevermind.” Lohen said mockingly while picking you up in the air. When you felt the impact of his arms against your body, you left out a gasp with little to no air in your lungs. Then a deep sigh after it.

“.. Put me down.” You said, voice breaking from the fear of a few seconds ago. You felt your whole face getting warm within seconds and you mentally scolded yourself for that. It was quite embarrassing to get saved from a head trauma by the person who placed a trap for you in first place.

"Magic word?"

"No."

"Well, seems like you're not touching the floor anytime soon then. Sucks for you." Lohen said. All he did was adjust your position on his arms so he could carry you in some bridal-like way.

You groaned, trying to break free from the stupid ropes left so you could just jump away from him. You had no idea how he made that trap, nor how many ropes he even used. He certainly dedicated a good amount of time for the knots though. "I have to work, dude!"

"I'll just say I was training you. It's true, you know?" He shrugged his shoulders, not getting rid of the grin on his face.

"Lohen!" You groaned again, whining in frustration and letting out a huff, which you regretted doing once you noticed his grin getting bigger, accompanied of a chuckle from his lips.

And for the record, damn him for being charming.

“You're cute when you say my name like that. Saying it like it's the reason of a catastrophe.. Equivalent of Klee saying a bad word, I bet." He mused sarcastically, but you were sure the first part had a softer tone. As if he did found you cute. "You know, Varka should give you your own personal title in the next title ceremony."

"I truly hope he gives me something that shows how much I despise you." You said between your teeth. Lohen scoffed in mock offense and gasped. But he quickly dropped the damsel in distress act and grinned again.

"Oh, I bet it would be fitting. How about.."

"Put me down before I start screaming my lungs out."

"Nah. Too long.."

"oh, by Barbatos.." You said, rolling your eyes. By the time he started walking towards the port, you had accepted your fate of getting scolded by Jean. But it meant he'd get scolded too, so that comforted you.

The knots of the thick ropes weren't piercing your body so much anymore, which was a welcomed change of sensory, but your head nearly (and kinda forcefully) resting close to his shoulder was definitely not being welcomed.

If you leaned a bit closer, you could genuinely smell him—a faint metallic scent, which you assumed was blood from monsters, and overall mostly mint. Weird combination, but you'd expect worse from Lohen. He actually smelled decent, honestly.

Before you realized, or before you could snap another insult at him and yell his name out loud in a scolding tone, he had placed you on the ground, undoing the stubborn knots. You personally thought it was ridiculous how it almost melted under his hands, while making you fight for your life a few minutes before.

“ Mondstadt's freedom is optional, apparently.." you thought out loud in a low murmur, sighing in relief once finally free from the ropes.

“ maybe you gotta find Seamus to check. ” Lohen retorted sarcastically, letting out a sigh that almost matched yours, If not by the clear deception from his. "Too bad I didn't get to see you fighting for your life in the elaborated traps."

"I'd rather never place a single step around any of your elaborated traps. Or any traps, for that matter!" You snapped back with a huff, which made his grin show up yet again. Gods, this guy had to go to the Confinement room more often.

"Yadadada! Love you too, bun!" Lohen said while stretching his arms up, walking to the entrance of the port with a completely innocent face. No soul would even think he literally just rescued you out of the trap he made for you.

One last groan echoed from your throat, but this one..eh, you couldn't help but allow it to sound a little affectionate. More amused than actually mad, if you squint. “Ugh.. Lohen.”

Lohen found that assuring and too enticing. It means there is something that causes it, and that something —maybe someone— feels fear. He couldn’t help but grin at the thought, and his menacing laugh earned him great stares from the people around him by the Good Hunter. People like you, unbeknownst to him.

Next, he stood by the blacksmith’s for a few hours, chatting up the mighty Wagner. If the suspect in question feels fear but is somehow strong enough to get away with all of their actions thus far, then they must, must, have a weapon. That’s what Lohen convinced himself.

“Any unusual customers thus far?” He began probing, acting like the usual worrywart knight. Wagner thought for a moment before answering, after all, he’d heard of the knight having had the nerve to poison the grandmaster himself. Why he remains unscathed and still employed was a mystery. “Not quite! Well, there was a time where someone brought over 200 pieces of iron to make..” yeah, Lohen was not hearing all of that. Sounds like a hassle, but Wagner seems normal enough. Boring. Time to do what the blacksmiths do best, strike while the iron is hot. “I see, I see..I did come here for..a commission, if you will. I want you to make a new weapon for me.” Wagner huffed out a breath as he set aside his hammer, nodding as nonchalantly as ever. “Let’s see..how about a weapon designed to kill even with just the slightest cut? Something that I can innovate better, or something easy to stab with? I’m thinking…long, sharp, but round.” Wagner, personally, found it real odd.

Meanwhile, you stood just by the adventurer’s guild in front of Katheryne, parasol in your hand and basically shaking in your boots. What the fuck what the fuck what the fuck—

“Just kidding!” Lohen smiled, slapping the blacksmith’s back. “Ah..ahahaha, quite funny, Lohen. Anything else, then?” Wagner replied with a forced laugh, not wanting to offend the young lad. Lohen didn’t mind, really, even as he senses the judgment.

Because he’s pretty sure he had it figured out at that point.

Much to your dismay and current nightmare, Lohen sits in front of you at the most secluded table in Angel’s share, elbow propped atop the table with his chin on his palm, observing you like a hawk.

You’re scared shitless. He caught you off guard, catching you right before you tried to leave the place because you saw him coming through the window. “Quite a shame you’re leaving so early! You sure you can’t stay for another..hour or so?” Flashing his smile, getting the others sitting by the side to push you into entertaining the knight for a little while (you’ve decided to make them your next target, if you survived today, for having you take the fall of Lohen’s weird habit of being eerily creepy.)

“Say, if I told you I know what you are, is there a chance you’d just confess?” He was the one to break the ice, voice laced with a daring tone. “W..what would happen, then..?” You realize after a second you basically just revealed yourself. In your defense, he’s a scary guy. You’re humane enough to choose to be impaled by one person rather than burned at the stake in front of the people who viewed you normally.

He sighed in disappointment after a while, looking to the side. “Well that’s not very fun. Why admit so easily?” He looked like those rabbits that didn’t get the food they wanted and slapped everything away. What a sadist— was he expecting some sort of chase? “..I’m not dumb.” He rolled his eyes at that, tutting as he leaned back and looked at you with disdain. “Tell me what you are, and I’ll reward you in my specialty.”

“..I come from a generation of vampires.” His gaze shot up, doubt creeping up til it’s shown on his expression. Those were legends. Not quite a realistic one, as well, in his opinion. “Vampires suck and kill for blood, not memories. Why not kill instead of leaving a trace?” How vampire-phobic. “Because I’m humane enough?” Irritating. He was irritating. That’s the perfect word for what you feel right now, despite feeling boundless fear just a few minutes ago before he opened his mouth.

“So you do still suck blood?” Puzzling question. Still, you nod slowly as you looked at him curiously. And since he kept doubting your vampire-ness, you even showed him your fangs. “I promise you I’ve never killed anyone..” “Let’s hear that defense when we’re actually secluded, hm?” He responds with a slight shake to his usual smile as he stood up and loomed over your form, hand on your shoulder as he gestured for you to stand up and follow him as well.

For once, you thought to yourself:

Maybe it wouldn’t be bad to try and kill him.

He walked in seemingly deep thought and only glanced back once in a while as he led you to a very secluded place outside the city walls, smirking as he asked, “anything else you can inflict your victim with? Let’s see…special, one-of-a-kind poison? Paralysis? Paranoia, anxiety, mind-control?” He bombarded you with these questions with a rather manic pace as he smiled.

Stepping back a bit, your previous couragious thought was scrapped all too well. “S..sorry?” It was terrifying. He was terrifying. The way he spoke, the way he followed your steps and advanced himself, slowly leaning and leaning as you couldn’t bring yourself to take your gaze away…how everything darkened because of his own shadow cast over your form.

He hummed, gaze unshifting even as he tilted his head. “You’re pretty powerful, aren’t ya? Why so scared?” Leaning close, he grinned. “Say, how about we strike a deal? I can let you live your life, you know? Truth be told I could just hang you in front of the city gates—or just your home.” There it is.

Alright. You can make a deal with a devil.

Trying your best to at least solidify your expression, you took a deep breath before looking at him—true form showing. “Great. I was just thinking I’d have no choice but to do this the hard way.” Feeling a bit more confident, you managed to put some distance between you, arms crossing. “Spit.”

He cackled, shaking his head. “Noo..no, no. It’s more like bite.” “Sorry?” “Bite me?”

He sounded way too casual and comfortable asking something so.. so..inherently weird. “You want me to…bite you?” Was he serious? If you weren't a superbeing, you'd have seriously doubted your hearing. “Yes? I’ve been wondering..I see fellow knights experience the same thing, but no, not me. Is it because I’m far too intimidating for you?” He hummed in slight displeasure as he started unbuttoning his intricate uniform, his vest fully off and his white shirt buttoned down just enough to show the skin of his neck.

"I'm not sure what you mean." You sighed out, swallowing as you stared at the newly revealed skin. "It means that you keep avoiding the one person that enjoys your kind of play." He whispered as he took your hand up to grasp—no, choke himself. You couldn't help but shudder at the feeling of his soft skin and the quick pulse that you sensed more than usual, breathing heavy at the sudden realization of your body that blood is just so close.

You take it back now, as you looked at him with a slight blush. If earlier, the request was inherently weird, now it was inherently sexual.

For the first time since he's been on your radar, the vice captain seemed delicious in more ways than one. But that's quite a dangerous thought, so you push it back.

He seemed to notice your wavering focus as he moved his unoccupied hand to your head, pushing it down enough for your nose to graze his neck. "What are you waiting for? Come on now..suck." His choice of words only darkened your cheeks in rouge that he picked up on way too quickly, only responding with a snicker and a nudge down.

Alright. You can do this. It's blood. It's blood. it's blood.

After muttering more reassurances to yourself, you finally bite.

-

Regrettably, Lohen doesn't remember much of what went down last night. He only remembers the sunny part of his day, how he went to the tavern, and how he waited for someone.

Unfortunately for you, it's stuck to your mind.

Fortunately for him, however, he already had an idea.

After all, what kind of night could tattered memories with a person and a mark on his neck mean besides a clearly pleasurable one?

->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->->

From his perch against the southern bookcases, Lohen watched you with his arms crossed over his chest. In his right hand, he held his favorite blade, twirling it around his finger until the hilt pressed into his palm, then twirling it around again. The soft sound of his knife hitting the fabric of his glove was quick to fill the space around him, which had returned to near silence yet again after Theodore’s departure.

You walked past him with a stack of books in your hands, giving him a glance. “Can you put that away, please?”

He sighed through his nose. Slotting his dagger back into its sheath, he pouted dejectedly at your back. You didn’t pay him a shred of attention, instead focusing on your duties of restocking the bookshelves and rearranging any misplaced codices.

Lohen sighed aloud. When you still didn’t turn around, he sighed yet again. Sighing so hard and so repetitively that he was nearly going dizzy from it, you eventually turned around with a smile that didn’t match the glare in your eyes.

“What is it, Lohen?”

Lohen. It was always ‘Lohen’ with you. But with Theodore, it was ‘Theo’.

“Nothing,” he said, his shoulders rising in a shrug. “Nothing at all.”

You stared at him for a moment, then eventually frowned. Your voice was gentle. “You look upset.”

“Upset? I’m not upset.” Lohen shrugged again, glaring down at the wood floor. “What would make you think I’m upset?”

Your hands directed his face to yours. He ignored the flush of warmth that it sent through his cheeks, and tried further to ignore the sudden thrill in his chest. When you smiled, he swallowed his nerves.

“What’s wrong?” you asked softly.

“N-nothing,” he answered, his hands rising to your wrists. “It’s nothing, really. I’m fine.”

“If you were fine you would have been using your cryo-infused hand to scare me when my back was turned,” you laughed. Softening your voice, you said, “Please, just talk to me. I don’t want you to be upset, Lohen.”

The way your thumbs brushed over his cheeks felt all too tender. Smiling rather awkwardly, he squeezed your wrists between his fingers.

“We started at ‘Vice Captain’,” he said, “and then we got to ‘Lohen’. But we never got much farther past that.”

“Hm? What do you mean?”

“Theodore. Theodore is ‘Theo’. But me? I’m ‘Lohen’.”

“Well, that’s your—...oh,” you said inquisitively, your eyes widening. “I see what you mean. You want me to give you a nickname?”

“It doesn’t…have to be a nickname,” he babbled, feeling oddly out of his element as he did. “I mean, I call you Bun and Princess. But you only ever call me ‘Lohen’, even though I know you call other people shorter names and stuff.”

“I’ll call you whatever you want me to, Lohen. How does handsome sound?”

Your arms looped around his neck, and as you smiled with those half-lidded eyes of yours, Lohen’s nervous laughter burst from his lips. Staring at you with wide eyes and a face so hot, he was convinced his vision had flipped to pyro, he quickly said, “That’s a lot more embarrassing than I thought it would be.”

“Hm?” You tilted your head, staring down at his mouth as you grinned. “What, you don’t like that, sweetheart?”

“Fuck,” Lohen stammered, his eyes shifting around the library. “Bun, quit.”

“But honey,” you purred, the heat of your breath tickling his upper lip. “You’re the one who wanted me to call you something different. You mean you don’t like it?”

“I’m gonna kill you,” he answered, his grin hurting his face. “Stop it.”

“Oh, but, baby. You look like you like it.”

“Let’s just…let’s just go back to Lohen.”

You laughed, and with a chaste press of your mouth to his, he laughed back. He glanced around once more, ensuring the library was as empty as ever before throwing his arms around your hips. Backing you into the bookshelf, his grinning lips pressed against yours before he gave you a playful little nibble.

“I’m working,” you laughed.

“Take a five minute break,” he crooned.

“Vice Captain,” you murmured. “You’re going to get me in trouble.”

“Oh, yeah? That so, Library Girl?”

The way you giggled tickled his ears. He pressed his lips to your cheek, peppering kisses against the corner of your mouth as you laughed and laughed and laughed.

“Lohen,” you said, ever so dearly. “You know I just like the sound of your name, right?”

He cracked a smile.

“You know, whenever you say it, Bun…I like the sound of it too.”

Yandere Alpha Lohen with a reader who has a very poor sense of smell, so it’s hard to pick up or differentiate scents. he has to protect you! what if there’s someone who wants to harm you? how are you supposed to be safe without being able to smell others? he definitely doesn’t use this to his advantage. not at all

lohen would never sneak into your house while he’s all sweaty and just roll around in your nest. or scent your clothes. or hide some of his clothes inside your nest.

would you be able to tell the difference if he did though? would you get mad at him? yell at him? would you confront him about it at all?

you’ve been wondering why everyone has been so distant lately, it’s making you feel sad and left out. the only one who still willingly talks to you is lohen, even if he’s busy as the vice captain. he’s so nice. even bringing you little gifts and trinkets.

For instance, Lohen — that little battle manic who rarely sought “friendship” unless he intended to use it for personal gain — had begun sticking to you like a slime. Weirdly enough, you seemed to reciprocate his enthusiasm, always inviting him for a spar at The Thousand Winds Temple.

At first, Varka didn't think too much of it. Whatever, maybe you were just being polite and entertaining the young captain's antics. Or, perhaps he had bribed you with that "friendship fee" of his — that was a possibility.

However, the more time you and Lohen spent together, the more you clung to one another, creating a bond Varka couldn't seem to write down as mere "friendliness":

I.

The first time Varka felt something was off with you two occurred during a rather mundane commission. The Knights of Favonius had received news regarding a massive Hilichurl camp near Windrise; concerned about its proximity to the main city, he had ordered his most capable knights to clear out the camps with him.

The commission goes swimmingly, like it always does — that is, until he hears a pained yelp belonging to his 4th company vice captain cut through the air. Immediately, Varka swivels his head 180 degrees to the point that he almost gets whiplash, but it’s worth it, because he witnesses the most astonishing sight before him: Lohen completely abandoning the massive Mitachurl he’d been sparring (probably with delight, knowing him) to rush to your aid.

“Lo,” you gasp weakly, groaning as you press a bloody palm against the gash at your waist (“Lo”? When the hell did you call that rascal such a sweet nickname?). Varka needs only to blink once before the offending monster crumbles to dust by a swift stab of Lohen’s dagger. If he didn’t know any better, he’d think Lohen looked far more frightening than usual as he decimated the creature — if that was even possible, anyway.

Varka stands motionless, stunned as Lohen instantly drops to your side. The crazed look in his eyes vanishes in favor of a concerned one, and the vice captain is visibly tense as he mutters a choice of curse words before scanning your body for injuries.

“Ah…” Lohen sucks in a sharp breath, uncharacteristically quiet. “Do you feel…alright?”

You shoot him a rather unimpressed look, elbowing him in the ribs with the remaining strength you have. “Does it look like I feel alright?”

Lohen raises both hands in surrender, shaking his head with a forced chuckle. “Right, right. C’mon, let’s get you fixed up.”

The remaining knights get the job done quickly. The entire Hilichurl camp is cleared out within seconds, but Varka cannot bring himself to care when there’s a miracle occurring right in front of his eyes. It’s true that despite Lohen’s usual aggressive and battle-hungry nature, the rascal had never ceased to look out for his fellow knights — but this time was different. There was surely something wrong with Lohen’s reaction today, and Varka couldn’t put his finger on what it was.

He only snaps out of his trance when Lohen’s grating voice pierces the air again. “Hey, Varka! Stop standing there like an idiot and get this young lady some medical aid, will ya?”

Varka grunts in response, beckoning the rest of his knights to follow. “Right,” he mutters under his breath, staring at the two of you. 

The bane of the Grand Master’s existence walks off with your arm around his shoulders. As Varka catches up, he could almost swear to Barbatos he hears Lohen tease: “You seemed distracted today — thinkin' about me too much? Okay, okay, I’m just kidding! Just…be more careful next time, kay? I really don’t like seeing you hurt.”

Varka shakes his head disbelievingly. Oh, yeah. He’s absolutely keeping an eye on the both of you from now on.

II. 

And so he does. 

The second time Varka notices something off about you two, he’s already drunk, head warm and fuzzy from the combination of alcohol and overstimulating noise echoing through the first floor of Angel’s Share.

The beer works well to clear his mind of most worries, though not the one clear goal he’s had since that last commission: to find out exactly what was going on between you and Lohen. Tonight was the perfect chance to do so — as long as one of you gets a little drunk, he supposes — so he leans against the table to peer at you two.

To no one’s surprise, you’re seated next to Lohen, who was nursing an apple cider in his hands. While he seemed quite awake and aware of his surroundings (much to Varka’s displeasure), the dandelion wine in your hands had rendered you tipsy, and you were already mumbling lazily against Lohen’s shoulder.

Perfect.

Varka clears his throat loudly in hopes of catching your attention.

“Uh, vice cap!”

Both you and Lohen turn your heads to face him simultaneously. That synchronism only makes Varka even more suspicious (yes, you were both vice captains, but he doesn’t care. That definitely meant something), so he decides that he must start an inconspicuous conversation in an effort to dig deeper. What counts as inconspicuous, Varka doesn’t really know — especially when he’s this buzzed from the beer in his tankard. Still, he knows he must try, so he blurts out the first thing that comes to mind.

“Ah, I’ve gotta confess — I kinda miss the days when Jean was Acting Grand Master!” he starts, words already slurring into an aimless ramble. “I swear to Barbatos, I’ve been bombarded with reports these days! It makes me want to mysteriously disappear again…uh, not that I’d want to dump all the paperwork on somebody else, of course…”

You and Lohen glance at each other, unable to hide your snickering. It makes Varka frown a bit — what was up with kids and their disrespect these days??

He does feel a bit better, though, when the two of you turn around to pay him attention once more.

“Hah, I get you, Grand Master–” you start.

“Oh, she really does–” Lohen adds, tone reeking of amusement and mockery.

You smirk, slapping the little rascal’s arm to shut him up (serves him right, Varka thinks). “No, no, I really do. I mean, I think I’d probably die if I had a mountain of paperwork on my desk every day. Y’know, Grand Master, I see you hiding away in the most random places to escape your work and take a nap.”

Varka huffs in indignation, face going a bit red at being discovered by his vice captain, but you cut him off before he can say anything.

“I’m a bit envious, though,” you sigh. “I wish I could sneak away to take a nap, considering I haven’t been sleeping well these days–”

Before you can finish your sentence, though, Lohen cuts in. His words are knowing and concerned, something Varka has probably witnessed from him maybe twice in this lifetime.

“Nightmares about the Wild Hunt again?” the vice captain murmurs, eyes softening in sympathy. “Was that why you were shaking in your sleep?”

You begin to nod in response, except a few seconds later, a look of realization flashes in your eyes. Varka follows your gaze as it anxiously scans across the table of fellow knights — all either too drunk or too engrossed in their own conversations to pay you and Lohen any mind.

Varka narrows his eyes. Everyone else may have missed that slip up, but he absolutely did not. He takes another swig of his beer before slamming the tankard down with a large thud. The Grand Master watches in satisfaction as you glance at him with wide eyes, visibly surprised at the sudden action.

“Lohen”, he huffs, suddenly getting a rush of liquid courage. Varka points a finger accusingly at the ranged company’s vice captain, a victorious smirk on his lips. “Tell me, how do you know what kinda dreams she’s been having, huh?”

Unfortunately, Lohen merely returns his question with an infuriatingly innocent smile, shrugging oh so casually in response.

“Heh- Great question, Grandmaster! You see, it’s simply because we’ve camped together during expeditions,” he drawls. “Our 4th company vice captain talks quite a lot in her sleep.”

Before Varka can protest, you mirror Lohen’s stupid innocent smile and cut in. “He’s right, Grand Master. Alas, I do talk out loud in my sleep — I have some pretty vivid dreams.” You glance toward Lohen, winking at him. “Thanks for putting up with my sleep talking, vice captain.”

Varka feels his right eye twitch at your unbelievable response. He looks between the two of you, opening his mouth in an attempt to complain, yet nothing comes out.

There’s no way he’s been conned. Again.

III.

After losing his only lead in the tavern a week ago, Varka had decided to give up and chugged 10 more beer bottles out of frustration.

If you and Lohen wanted to evade the truth, then so be it. He had far more important matters to attend to anyway — like the never-ending requisition forms currently spilling across his desk, or what to do with the poor new recruits Lohen was supposedly “testing” (more like torturing) with his increasingly dangerous poisoned drinks. 

Varka sighs, shoving his chair back and beckoning Lohen to gather the stack of forms and follow him out of the office. No matter — he would deal with the little rascal later. First, there were probably four more tasks he needed to complete before sitting his vice captain down for a more serious talk about his "tactics."

He’s mid-stride across the headquarters lobby, Lohen half a step in front of him, when he notices two familiar figures by the staircase. Varka squints. The Cavalry Captain is leaning against the railing, one arm braced on the wall beside your head. His face is far too close to yours, and Varka can't seem to put a finger on why the two of you together feels wrong.

As Kaeya notices the two men approach, the corner of his mouth quirks up, amused and expectant. He doesn’t turn to look, though, gaze still trained on you.

“I never see you off duty, vice captain,” he says smoothly, regarding you with a pleasant smile. “It’s a shame, really.”

Varka hears you laugh, a sweet sound falling from your lips. In front of him, Lohen instantly stops in his tracks.

He nearly walks straight into the little rascal — Varka’s sure he would have, if it weren’t for his amazing reaction time. He shoots Lohen an exasperated look, about to tell him off, but when his eyes land on the vice captain, he realizes that Lohen isn’t looking at him at all. Instead, Varka traces his icy stare to the staircase, where you were still chatting happily with the Cavalry Captain.

Ah.

He reaches out to place a soothing hand on Lohen’s shoulder, ready to stop him from whatever impulsive decision he was going to make, but the idiot was already striding toward you and Kaeya. 

“Vice captain,” Lohen greets you, voice paper thin. There's a shadow cast across his face, one that reminds Varka of the same unsettling expression he wore after returning from that underground auction. “These requisition forms require your countersignature. It’s urgent.”

Varka blinks, mouth falling open at the scene unfolding before him. Those forms were not urgent, relative to all his other paperwork. In fact, they weren’t even meant for the 4th company. But for some odd reason, Lohen was lying to your face, right in front of the Grand Master whom those papers belonged to.

You tilt your head questioningly, as if beckoning him to explain, but Lohen doesn’t bother to wait. He casually steps between you and Kaeya, making sure to completely block the Cavalry Captain from your view, before handing you the stack of forms in his hands.

Varka doesn’t miss the way Lohen’s fingers brush against yours for a second too long.

The sound of Kaeya’s chuckle snaps Varka out of his trance, and he finally manages to pick his jaw back up. He watches as the Cavalry Captain pushes off the wall, hands raised in mock surrender. 

“Ah, business calls. Expected nothing less from the ever busy young lady."

It isn’t until Lohen has herded you up the stairs, palm pressed insistently against your lower back, that Kaeya spares Varka a glance. There’s an amused glint in his eyes, as if he knows something the older man doesn’t.

“Forms,” he chuckles to himself, tasting the word on his tongue. The captain’s tone reeks of mockery. “How dreadfully urgent.”

Varka opens his mouth — to say what exactly, he didn’t know — but Kaeya was already strolling up the stairs, throwing a couple of words over his shoulder. 

“She’s very lucky. Don’t you think, Grand Master?”

Varka exhales slowly, not knowing whether to feel absolutely infuriated or exhilarated. There was no way in Teyvat he was getting any paperwork done after that — but perhaps his lead from last week hadn’t disappeared after all.

IV. 

In the next few days, Varka forced himself into work. For the sake of productivity, he desperately tried not to recall Lohen’s icy stare at the Cavalry Captain, or the way you’d let yourself be led away by the man without a single protest. Anyone could tell he had failed, though, by the stacks of unfinished papers still spread across his desk.

At least he’s learned something useful from the ordeal: it seemed that if Celestia wished to grant him more evidence of you and Lohen’s weirdness around each other, then it would do so during the most random, mundane, and totally unsuspicious moments of the day. Alas, there was no further point in lurking around the 4th and 5th company’s offices. He’s sure he would’ve accidentally walked in on you and Lohen making out, anyway.

Varka shakes his head in horror. Yeah — he’d rather not imagine that.

-

Ugh. 

The Grand Master groans, pinching the bridge of his nose as he walks into the mess hall. It’s only dawn, yet Jean had sternly insisted that he begin today’s work early. Varka supposes it was his own fault. After all, he clearly wasn’t disciplined enough to stop thinking about the past days’ events, resulting in more than usual leftover work. Still, he thinks he deserves some leniency considering the things he has witnessed.

Varka reaches for the coffee pot, grumbling to himself about how unfair everything was. He’s about to pour a cup for himself until suddenly, he hears familiar voices drifting from the kitchen.

He pauses. That was your voice. It was a tad sleepy and exasperated, yet no doubt belonged to his 4th company vice captain.

And right after that was definitely Lohen’s low rumble in response, though Varka couldn’t exactly make out the little rascal’s words.

Carefully, Varka sets down the coffee pot and begins creeping toward the kitchen doorway. He feels like a criminal about to commit atrocious sins — he really hopes there's no one else in the mess hall witnessing the embarrassment he's making of himself. Back pressed against cold marble, his head peeks out from behind the wall. 

You were at the stove with a spatula in hand, hair still a little mussed from sleep. Lohen doesn’t seem to mind, though, as he leans against the counter beside you. He’s slouched over, shoulder brushing against yours as he greedily takes up your personal space. You don’t seem to mind that, either.

“Stop staring,” you huff, without sparing Lohen a glance. “Go make yourself useful and grab the plates.”

However, Lohen doesn’t move an inch. If anything, he seems to shuffle even closer to you, voice lazy and amused as he responds: “Hey, don’t be so mean! I just like watching you.”

You fake gag at his response, but there’s an evident smile tugging at the corner of your lips — Varka could see that much from the doorway. “You’re insufferable.”

“You’ve mentioned.”

You shake your head and lift a spoon from whatever was sizzling in the pan, holding it out toward Lohen. The vice captain leans down, making a show of slowly taking the silverware into his mouth. You look at him weirdly, but he only flashes you a cheshire grin as he pulls back to lick his lips.

“Very good, as always! But more salt.”

You sigh, raising an eyebrow at him. “You always say that. Do you just like the taste of overwhelming saltiness or something?” you deadpan. “Actually…don’t answer that, you freak.”

Lohen laughs. “Yes. But I also say that because you always undersalt.”

“I do not–”

“You do,” he replies smoothly. The ease and certainty with which Lohen insists on this makes Varka suspect that the two of you have had this argument more than just once or twice.

You turn to glare at him, raising your spatula like a weapon. Lohen looks obviously amused at your crazed appearance, not at all concerned about your supposed threat.

“You bastard, I’ve never undersalted your food–”

Lohen smirks, reaching up to wipe something from the corner of your lip. Varka can’t tell what it is exactly, but what he can tell is that you freeze mid-sentence, voice faltering to nothingness. Instead of dropping his hand back to his side, Lohen shifts it down, cupping your jaw gently. He tilts your chin up so you’re forced to meet his gaze, already looking way too happy with himself.

“What were ya saying, now?”

“...stop trying to distract me,” you mumble, but your voice had gone noticeably breathier, like the movement had completely stolen the air from your lungs.

“Well, is it working?”

You don’t reply, instead turning back to the stove, but there’s an obvious flush creeping up your neck from where Varka stands. Lohen’s hand casually falls to your lower back as he leans around you to grab the salt shaker himself. 

“No worries, I’ll just do it myself,” he hums.

“Whatever,” you sigh. “You always end up doing it yourself, anyway. Picky, aren’t you?”

Varka bites hard on his tongue, forcing himself not to make a noise somewhere between awe and frustration. Oh, you liars. He was so going to station you in Brightcrown Mountains, as far away as possible from Dornman Port.

V.

In the following week, Varka continued to witness a rinse and repeat of these much-too-friendly interactions. By this point, he was 99.99% sure that the two of you were together — how could you not be? Sure, the Grand Master had nothing concrete, but he’d collected all the circumstantial evidence possible throughout the past month.

It was rather irksome.

He has to remind himself that you two are fully competent adults by now. If you wanted to keep your lives private, it was absolutely your right. Still, having known you and Lohen for the years that he did, Varka couldn’t help but suspect that you two were doing this on purpose — mocking and taunting him with these displays of affection while offering nothing absolute. It was you and Lohen, for Barbatos’s sake. If the two of you weren’t intentionally irritating him, then pigs could fly.

The matter was so irritating that after a particularly long meeting with Jean at the headquarters, Varka decided to take a walk through the garden courtyard. It was the perfect chance to clear his head before bed after that dual headache, he tells himself. A beautiful view and no one to pester him about the never-ending paperwork and two lying vice captains.

Varka rounds the corner, sighing softly as his gaze catches the familiar sight. The small courtyard is bathed in silver moonlight, fountain murmuring quietly at the center. The low hedges cast soft shadows against the stone walls, providing a sort of comfort to the exhausted man.

A beautiful view and no one to pester him. At least, that’s what the walk should have been — because he suddenly recognizes two very familiar people in the garden.

You’re pressed against the base of the windmill just beside the fountain, Lohen’s body caging you in. Neither of you seem to notice the Grand Master — considering that Lohen’s faced the opposite way and completely obstructing your view of anything else but him — but the two of you probably wouldn’t have noticed him anyway. Not when the little rascal was kissing you like a man starved, your hands tangled in his hair and pulling his body flush against yours.

Varka’s first instinct is to turn 180 degrees and run for his life, but his feet stay stubbornly rooted to the ground. His eyes take in details he’d rather not remember, like how Lohen has one hand braced against the wall beside your head, the other wrapped firmly around your waist. He’s pulled you in so close that there's not a breath of space between you two — Varka doesn’t remember the last time he’s seen Lohen look so starved for anything that wasn’t battle or bloodshed.

Boldly, you pull at the roots of his hair. Varka’s sure the little freak groaned at that, but even if he did, the Grand Master wouldn’t know. He wouldn’t know because it would’ve been covered by the rather loud and startled noise that leaves his lips at the sight.

Lohen goes completely still against you. Varka has to swallow his pride as he awkwardly shuffles in place, grimacing when the vice captain turns to meet his gaze.

“I–” he starts, voice uncharacteristically meek. “This isn’t– I wasn’t–”

Lohen’s expression doesn’t change, remaining completely unreadable. Varka thinks his vice captain is probably about to chop him to bits with that dagger, until he hears another voice ring out.

“Ah, Grand Master.”

It's your voice, light and amused and clearly not angry with him. You peek out from behind Lohen’s shoulder, shooting Varka a delighted grin.

“Grand Master," Lohen echoes, lips twitching into the barest hint of a smirk.

“Don’t ‘Grand Master’ me like that,” Varka grunts, pointing a finger at his ranged company vice captain. “Y-you knew I was here?” He doesn’t even wait for a response, gaze snapping to yours. “And you? You knew I was here too?"

You bite your lip, expression far from guilt or embarrassment. In fact, you were trying not to laugh, cheeks puffing out and stomach twitching in an attempt to hold back the high-pitched noises already seeping through your lips.

“We heard you,” you admit, a giggle escaping despite your efforts. “Your footsteps are quite loud, Grand Master.”

“You’re really not as sneaky as you think you are,” Lohen adds helpfully.

Varka’s face goes redder than it does after drinking a tankard of beer. He’s sputtering, opening and closing his mouth like a fish out of water.

“Ugh...don’t tell me the two of you knew I was going insane and were taunting me on purpose,” he groans. “Though I have a suspicion I’m right about that, unfortunately..."

The two of you glance at each other, amusement written all over your faces. Lohen’s smirking ever so casually, scanning his surroundings as if this situation is of zero importance to him — it’s so infuriating that it makes Varka want to punch him and wipe that smirk off of his face.

“Oops,” you reply, clearly not very sorry about the month of torture you’ve given him. 

“It was just too good of an opportunity to pass up,” Lohen shrugs. “Might even be better than seeing you fall into the traps I dug, Grand Master.”

If Varka were a tea kettle, he’s sure he would’ve had steam rising from his head by now. He’s at an utter loss for words, mouth opening and closing but nothing coming out — Barbatos, what did he do to deserve such horrible vice captains? The Grand Master huffs in exasperation, turning on his heel and walking away as fast as he can.

“I’m stationing you two on opposite ends of Mondstadt,” he throws over his shoulder indignantly. “And don’t even think about going on an expedition together again. I know you rascals are sneaking into each others’ tents at night!”

“Wha- Grand Master!” 

Varka is an observant man, after all.

⟡ lohen was the one who confessed. it was after a spar, and it wasn’t at all romantic like he planned, but he just couldn’t bear to let you go home another day without telling you.

⟡ he’s big on physical affection and acts of service. he doesn’t think he’s particularly good with romantic words (surprising for someone who’s always talking lmao.) so he feels the need to compensate with touch or acts. he’s always holding onto your waist or gently running his hand up and down on your lower back. it soothes him to know you’re nearby.

⟡ as for acts of service, he’s willing to clean your weapon(s) for you without asking, or he’ll bring you things you’ll need for the day silently. maybe its a deep desire to prove himself to be useful so you won’t leave. he’ll obviously never admit it.

⟡ he tries his best to show affection verbally, even though he thinks his words aren’t adequate enough to truly convey his adoration for you. he calls you bunny, (yes i’m like everyone else on this okay) sweetness, dearest… whatever makes you blush the most.

⟡ you call him chicken as joke. (get it. loHEN. hen = chicken. please laugh.) but most pet names or terms of endearment make him smile and his cheeks turn a pretty shade of pale pink, which is always a win for you.

⟡ lohen often feels undeserving of you. deep in the night, when its just the two of you talking about anything and everything, he’ll turn to you and ask if you really want him of all people. he disguises it as a joke, but the slight glimmer of insecurity in his face and the barely noticeable tremble in his voice betrays him. it breaks your heart to see him looking almost lost and frightened. :c

⟡ dates with lohen is either sparring -> turns into more than that (👅), exploring, or eating somewhere. he’s always trying to improve his spice tolerance. you took him to wanmin restaurant once and he asked for “their spiciest.” it ended with him in tears while grinning from the spice (freak.) he’s been trying to bring his tolerance up ever since.

⟡ for someone so reckless, especially when he’s on the battlefield, he worries himself sick when you’re injured. he’s pushing people out of the way frantically to get to you, kneeling down to your side while he’s trying to coax you to look at him with shaky hands and an even shakier voice. (oneshot incoming 👀)

⟡ lohen refuses to leave your side when you’re recovering from a serious injury. he’ll fall asleep kneeling next to your bed, leaning his cheek on the mattress while his hand seeks your limp one. it takes varka himself to get him up from your side. if your recovery takes weeks, he’ll (eventually) go back to his duties as vice captain but his heart isn’t in it. even when he’s sparring, his hits are weak and lack the passion he so clearly has for fighting. his eyes constantly drift to the building where you’re resting, or he’ll space out thinking of you. things lose their meaning without you by his side.

⟡ he falls asleep and wakes up first. he likes to watch you sleep in the morning while he gently strokes your hair or your back. the start of the day is one of the few times he’s calm like this.

⟡ lohen likes to spoon with you, but somehow you’ll wake up with him sprawled half on top of you, his chin resting on your shoulder. he looks so at peace, its really cute.

⟡ his favourite place to kiss you are literally anywhere, but if he had to pick… your lips, cheek and shoulders. he likes pressing kisses to your cheek and feeling the heat from your flushed face on his lips.

⟡ he’s a biter. (not house trained. smh.) sometimes when you’re cuddling he just sinks his teeth lightly into your neck or gently tug on your skin with his teeth.

⟡ lohen loves a partner who is his equivalent. not necessarily just at fighting, but someone who is as good as he is at fighting but at something else. (does that make sense? maybe not.) he likes someone who can handle their own, its really attractive to him.

⟡ along the same vein, but there’s something soo attractive to him about a partner who’ll put him in his place. a lot of people fear him, so hearing you who’ll tell him off for being reckless or untidy is almost refreshing. you could be scolding him for his messes and then you turn around and see him looking at you with the biggest heart eyes. he’s so utterly gone for you.

Lohen:

HECK YEAH

Let's be fr rn. This masochistic psychicopath twink is into being put in his place.

He desperately wants to be stepped on.

Metaphorically and physically.

Be rough. Be mean. Be merciless. Give him colorful bruises. He adores it when you are unforgiving.

Would look at you with literally hearts in those dead dead eyes of his if you cause painful injuries<33

They don't have to be necessarily dangerous. Just something that gets his blood hot and running<3 (But then again, as long as he got a good fight out of it, he won't mind bleeding to his death by your hands<3 or taking his last breath in your arms knowing that you were the one to steal it from him—).

Sorry this is so unromantic and way too freaky BUT THIS MAN CANNOT BE NORMAL ABOUT IT.

You cannot convince me that he doesn't get off to getting beaten to a pulp by his partner.

This twink is getting destroyed, alright.

Literally.

Durin:

YES

Just look me in the eye and tell me he is not a switch.

You can't. Because he is one.

He gets SO subby whenever he bottoms for whatever reason though... always becoming such a drooling sobbing mess... eager to please like the obedient little thing he is.

It's just that you make him feel so so good he just can't help himself but be messy with it :(

He is usually more of the growly type, but take advantage of his sensitive parts and you'll get him to make the sweetest whines for you<33

Just make sure that he feels loved and cared for, and you'll be rewarded with unshakable his eternal devotion<3

Sorry he is just so cutehzgvjhdshjdg my sweet baby I want all the good things for him<3

Layla:

PLSPLSPLS

Do you really think she even has the energy to top?

No. The right answer is no.

I think she's generally very quiet, but she makes up for it by how easily flustered she is<3

Can barely handle much in her natural habitat (bottoming), so please don't try to make her top :(

She is so overwhelmed and too flustered by everything that is happening.

Will still do her best despite everything, because she is just that sweet<3

Until she realizes that she may have bitten more than she can chew.

Starts begging you to please please please switch over she really can't do this.

She is just so mhmdhlklf<3 I think she deserves a reward for being so good to you<33

I love her sm omg is this too obvious.

Albedo:

Yes.

Agrees way too fast when you ask, actually.

Not necessarily because he is a bottom but I think he loves expirementing— Also kinda saw it coming. It just so happens that you asked earlier than he anticipated you would.

I like to believe that the star mark on his neck is sensitive, so show it some love, would you<3

Not gonna lie, I think he'll be so into it.

Like he'll realize how much more reactive he is when you are topping and start asking you to top more often (For science!)

Prolly asks you to write your observations down for him to check on later (💀)

Come on he obviously can't do it himself with the state you leave him in (HECK YEAH DESTROY THAT TWINK—)

Anyways it is time to bring out the smut writer in you.

Sorry if this is ooc he's such a pretty princess in my head I want to bbg him so bad (😖)

— but I also wanna ruin him and that smart mouth of his untill he can't spew any scientific nonsense at me anymore<3

Kazuha:

No.

Just hear me out on this one.

The service dom in him cannot, in any way, let the love of his life do all the work when he is right there.

Unlike a lot of people in this list, however, he is just human, so you can always fight him for that position...

Gets caught so off guard when you manage to flip him down and start toying with him.

(Thinks it's kinda hot—)

Find that sensitive spot and suddenly, his words are not as flowery nor as eloquent anymore<3

Just make sure it stays that way for as long as possible, would you<3

Especially since he will always be on guard from now on, you'll have to be more clever with your tactics if you want him writhing under you<3

Wanderer:

Yes (HEAR ME OUT I HAVE CONVINCING ARGUMENTS TRUST)

Here's the thing. Sex for Wanderer is unnecessary; he doesn't need it and doesn't crave it. However, he will help his partner out if they want it.

I think it is a very intimate affair to him. As far as he understands it; it is a process of stripping himself bare of everything he ever used to hide in and serving what remains of his wretched soul to you on a silver platter for you to judge and see.

And he can't just do that with anyone now, can he?

It's kind of an all-in deal to him. If you are going to do this, then he won't do it unless he feels safe enough around you to trust you with EVERYTHING.

Would genuinely cry if you treat his body with care, ignoring all his encouragement to go all out and his "I can handle it" talk in favor of treating him like the precious thing he thinks he's not.

He is shaking the entire time, feeling so vulnerable and so so loved.

I love him so much sorry if the special boy treatment is showing.

Scaramouche:

Absolutely NOT.

He can take care of you just fine— in fact, I think he is so much more gentler with his beloved than one would assume him to be.

He's just... not ready to be as vulnerable yet. He wants to, he really does, but the thought of actually doing that makes his synthetic skin crawl.

He's also seen firsthand how fragile humans can be, and he's way too paranoid to let you do any physically exerting tasks on his watch. Especially if you were a non-combatant.

I think your only chance at catching him at his most vulnerable would be after an agonizingly long expedition in the Abyss. Where time flows much faster and days turn into weeks and weeks into months.

He's ways extremely clingy (more than he already is, anyways) after such ventures and weirdly pliant to all sorts of requests that he would've otherwise instantly dismissed.

Fights it at first. Then, let's it happen. You just need to use the right words (and actions)

And suddenly he just looks so soft and so gentle and so so unlike himself ughh.

You could almost see the Kabukimono in him, if not for the fact that he keeps hiding his face

Probably cries. Definitely cries. Soft Scara the things I'll do for you—

God he makes me sick (/affec)

Do not even DARE mentioning it to him later, though. Whatever happens in those moments STAYS in those moments.

Please for his sake just... Don't.

(He's growing on me and I HATE IT)

Kabukimono:

YES

VERY eager to please. Can take whatever position you want him to!

Just... make sure to show how him how first.

Extremely vocal; moaning, begging, gasping. Will cling to you desperately while doing it all.

Doesn't know how much it affects you, but archon knows it does and it affects you bad.

No wonder he always ends up being such a pretty mess after<3

Definitely insists on returning the favor at some point. He is such a sweetheart<3

A fast learner, would use all the techniques you used on him before and carefully watch how much you are affected by them.

Takes your noises as approval. Whenever he is being loud it means he likes it. Surely it is the same for you, right<3

Despite that, he is still a bit unsure sometimes

He is being such a sweet thing to you. Please assure him that he is doing good :(

Just the fact that he can see you getting physically affected by him is enough, really! But a bit of praise can go a long way with him<3

Just think of it as motivation! The same way his vocal nature encourages you to ruin him<3

Chiori:

No.

That's her position the fuck (🤨) She ain't bottoming to nobody.

Also she knows damn well you ain't lasting (💀)

I think she is very gentle, but ask for a chance to be the top and she'll give you the bIGGEST side eye.

If you try to undermine her during the act she can and WILL immediately destroy any attempt at that.

She is so sassy, brat taming is in her nature.

Puts lingerie on you and uses the fabric shears to pin you to the bed so you can't escape her.

Is very patient when it comes to her partner, and has no qualms about teasing you all day<3

Won't let you get that relief until you are begging and sobbing pretty for her<33

Can always be a tad bit kinder to you, though. Just be good and listen to her well next time. You can do that, right<3

Heizou:

Yes. But omg he will he give you hELL.

Lays on his back, his arms behind his head as a pillow and the most arrogant looking uwu face you can imagine.

Smug fuck (I will peg that twink)

Wind is strong. ANYWAYS.

Loud on purpose at first. Then ACTUALLY loud when you start learning more about his dos and don'ts.

If you are the type to give commands then be assured that he will not be following any<3

Even when completely ruined he still finds the energy to be such a brat.

Nothing that cannot be fixed by being a bit rougher though<3

Put him on a leash. Maybe add a pretty rope too. And see how fast his confident facade drops when he is so desperate for that sweet release :(

He is such a whore (/affec) I love him

Illuga:

No.

Another twink who refuses to let his partner do any of the heavy lifting.

This one, however, is much more easier to fluster than the other.

A hot breath behind his reddening ear, a teasing finger under his sleeveless turtleneck, and the once dependable captain is no longer capable of the most basic functions anymore<3

Bonus points if you put a possesive hand on that small waist of his as you guide him somewhere more... private.

It's for a super secret important thing, you swear! (He knows damn well that you are lying)

It's almost pathetic, really. The way he is so determined to pretend have any sort of control yet gives in the moment you take the lead.

Feels so guilty that he is "making" you pleasure him. But he also can't get himself to tell you to stop because you are just so good at what you do he loses all words<3

Becomes so clingy and emotional during times like these. Please give him the praise he deserves :(

Freminet:

I think we all already know the answer to this one (💀)

He is the bottomest bottom to ever bottom.

This is like one of three things the genshin fandom universally agrees on.

That twink is already getting destroyed.

I genuinely think he'll cry if you try to make him top you.

Combust on the spot, even.

He'll still try, of course, but the poor thing's hands would be shaking so hard he can barely unbutton your shirt or unbuckle your bottoms.

Stutters out multiple sorrys for each time his fingers slip as he fumbles with your clothes.

He's just so hard but he's also too freaking flustered to do anything about it (my shayla :( )

Will look at you with the saddest, most guilty and teary-eyed expression when he realizes that he has been unconciously humping your thigh the entire time

(He's so pathetic I love him)

Please stop bullying him, he really can't take it anymore :(

Shenhe:

Yes.

Let's be for real; you already top her most of the time.

Something something the red rope is there to keep her in check something something sexual intimacy is a very emotional affair that may or may not trigger her.

Although she is faring better now, Shenhe still fears having any sort of power over you, so she would rather just let you have any advantage she can give.

Not that it would matter much if she actually went on a rampage. But it's the thought that counts<3

I think she's a breather. No loud moans, no grunts or growling. Just soft, quiet breaths.

Would not mind if you are loud, though. The entire point from this is that everyone is at their most vulnerable, right?

If you ever made her top you then she'll be so sweet and attentive<3

Quietly asking for consent before touching anything and constantly checking if you are comfortable.

She is just trying her best, and god is she good.

Mavuika:

Yes.

Thinks you can't handle her (Smug Fuck x2)

You can't, but still—

Is very chill in general, but oh archons can she be such a tease when she wants to be.

Would go out of her way to hold her own reactions in. She just wants you to go all out on her<3

.. and maybe tire yourself out to the point you cannot continue anymore.

Can and will taunt you. Again, she is just encouraging you to reach your limits<3

Won't do it for much though because she knows when you are too exhausted and it's her duty now to take good care of you too<3

Can be very gentle when she wants to be.

You were doing your best just now. It's her turn to return the favor now<3

As always, this is written just for fun. Feel free to pile up your own thoughts on it :>