â  i saw then how i had changed. â
â Â name one hero who was happy â you canât. Â â
â Â i feel like i could eat the world raw. Â â
â Â you are half my soul, as the poets say. Â â
â Â i have no need to forgive you. you cannot offend me. Â â
â Â i do not fear ridicule. i never have. Â â
â Â you have always trusted so easily; you have had so little in your life to fear or suspect. Â â
â Â do you hear me? please, say something. Â â
â Â your face is like quicksilver, always racing to something new. you unsettle me. Â â
â Â you do not give things up so easily now as you once did. Â â
â Â now i know how to make you follow me everywhere. Â â
â  i would know your face in dark or disguise. i would know it even in madness. â
â Â there is no law that gods must be fair. Â â
â Â i have never seen anyone fight the way you do. Â â
â Â our dead come for their vengeance regardless of witnesses. Â â
â Â the sorrow was so large it threatened to tear through my skin. Â â
â Â when you die, all things soft and beautiful and bright would be buried with you. Â â
â Â you were always better with words than i. Â â
â Â i will never leave you. it will be this, always, for as long as you will let me. Â â
â Â you smile, and your face is like the sun. Â â
â  i thought you were â something. you do not â you do not move like a human. â
â  do you want to walk up to the woods? â
â Â you canât be very wounded if you can stand for so long. Â â
â Â there are no bargains between lion and men. i will kill you and eat you raw. Â â
â Â we are like gods at the dawning of the world. Â â
â Â nothing could eclipse the stain of this dirty, mortal mediocrity. Â â
â Â i yearn for the darkness and silence of the underworld, where i can rest. Â â
â Â those seconds, half seconds, that the line of our gaze connected, were the only moment in my day that i felt anything at all. Â â
â you seem utterly unaware of your effect on the people around you.  â
â Â it was almost like fear, in the way it filled me, rising in my chest. it was almost like tears, in how swiftly it came. Â â
â Â you are a weapon, a killer. do not forget it. Â â
â i have heard that men who live by a waterfall cease to hear it â in such a way did i learn to live beside the rushing torrent of my doom.  â
â Â if you have to go, you know i will go with you. Â â
â Â there is no one like you. Â â
â we have given each other wounds, but they are not mortal.  â
â  and perhaps it is the greater grief, after all, to be left on earth when another is gone. â
â  who can be ashamed to lose to such beauty? it is enough to watch you win. â
â do not let what you have gained this day be so easily lost.  â
â  you have killed them and taken your vengeance. it is enough. â
â Â no man is worth more than another, wherever he is from. Â â
â Â strange that such a small kindness feels like grace. Â â
â Â you can use a spear as a walking stick, but that will not change its nature. Â â
â Â i cannot bear to see you grieving. Â â
â i remember little more than scattered images from my life then.  â
â Â i would recognize you by touch alone, by smell; i would know you blind, by the way your breaths came and your feet struck the earth. i would know you in death, at the end of the world. Â â
â Â i see a dozen men here ready to leap on each otherâs throats. Â â
â Â in my land a bow is marked as the weapon of cowards. Â â
â Â you may still make a good person. Â â
â Â you donât bother to threaten me, yet. i should be worth threatening. Â â
â Â the memories well up like springwater, faster than i can hold them back. Â â
â Â i hoped that you would come. Â â
â Â the voices of the dead were said to have the power to make the living mad. Â â
â i have weathered the anger of gods before.  â
â Â i thought of how many nights i had lain awake in this room, loving you in silence. Â â
â Â there is nothing in the world i want more than to know what you had not said. Â â
â  you will never gain fame from your fighting. does this surprise you? â
â  my mind is filled with cataclysm and apocalypse: i wish for earthquakes, eruptions, flood. only that seems large enough to hold all of my rage and grief. â
â Â i will not cry in front of you. Â â
â listen to me. you go too far in this. i will not be able to protect you. â
â Â there is no honor in betraying your friends. Â â
â Â iâm afraid I have been prompted by a rare stirring of guilt. Â â
â Â i promised myself that if i ever saw you again, i would keep my thoughts behind my eyes. Â â
â Â i did not want you to see my fear, though normally we kept nothing from each other. Â â
â Â gods and mortals never mix happily in our stories. Â â
â Â you will be dead soon enough. Â â
â Â you are destroying yourself. you will not be loved for this, you will be hated, and cursed. Â â
â Â you left yourself today. and now you are returned. Â â
â Â you are a better person than i. Â â
â  whatever you do, i shall stand with you, as i always have. â
â Â you have looked at me a thousand thousand times, but there is something different in this gaze, an intensity i do not know. Â â
â Â my life is my reputation. it is all i have. Â â
â may i give you some advice? if you are truly his friend, you will help him leave this soft heart behind.  â
â  what are you thinking about? â
â Â even the boldest of people would whisper a prayer if they brushed against me. Â â
â Â the keen edge of my envy was like flint, a spark away from fire. Â â
â  do you think we fight hopeless wars? â
â Â it is strange, that you would speak against betrayal. Â â
â Â if every soldier killed only those whoâd personally offended him, weâd have no wars at all. Â â
â no one has ever tried to take something from me.  â
â Â stay behind me. Â â
â  will you help me put the rest of my armor on? â
â your face is blank and barren, like another language, impenetrable.  â
â Â i am here because i believe that we will win. i am staying until the end. Â â
â Â your presence is like a stone in my shoe, impossible to ignore. Â â
â Â he is not worthy of you. he never has been. Â â
â  will you tell me who hurt you? â
â it is like a nightmare; i expect, each moment, to wake to relief. but there is no waking.  â
â Â i do not need to prove myself to you. to any of you. Â â
â Â you have always thought too much of yourself. Â â
â Â some men gain glory after they die, while others fade. Â â
â Â even here, behind the darkness of my eyelids, i cannot name the thing i hope for. Â â
â Â our joy is so bright we can see nothing else but the other. Â â
â Â you have a tender heart. an admirable quality, surely. Â â
â Â you are spring, golden and bright. envious death would drink your blood, and grow young again. Â â
â Â i will not be the raven on your shoulder all the time, predicting gloom. Â â
â Â you look different in sleep, beautiful but cold as moonlight. Â â
â  when there is greed, there is hope. â
â Â i could have told you more, of the dreams that leave me bleary and bloodshot, the almost-screams that scrape my throat as i swallow them down. Â â
â Â you are angry, and not without reason. Â â
â you feel mislead; you were promised victory.  â
â Â you know, itâs funny; i keep thinking iâve seen you before. Â â