BPD

Odaiba Day 2025 Lead-Up Part 13/13 - Actual Odaiba Day Edition

my thoughts aren't dark, life doesn't feel hopeless, I know the mood will pass, I'm calm and at ease with that

but I still feel flat, tired, unenthusiastic about anything, I don't want to eat, I'm not drinking enough water, I didn't leave bed today until 6pm

but when I did I stood outside, I planted my bare feet in the wet grass, and for a moment I didn't feel so numb, for a moment it was nice. I enjoyed that. I was capable of enjoying that, even if briefly

it's like I'm stuck halfway, I feel like thunder without rain

I have been second choice my whole life,

A constant struggle, a never-ending strife.

Always an option, never a priority,

A feeling of neglect, of ambiguity.

I wonder how it would feel to be first,

To be the one that they choose, not coerced.

To be the center of their world, their heart,

To be loved and cherished, from the very start.

But maybe being second choice is a gift,

For it helps us to see, to sift,

Through the ones who truly care,

And those who only want to share.

So let us embrace our place in life,

And let our hearts be free from strife.

For we are worthy, no matter what they say,

And we will find our way, come what may.