i sthlammed my penisth in the car door

ma'am, I'm going to place you on a brief hold while I look for a reaction image

are you his beautiful wife? you are not his beatiful wife? sad snooting

Is it common knowledge that clownfish have a language? Like a vocal one? Because I just mentioned that to my friend and she was shook. Usually you can’t hear their vocalizations because they’re underwater but if they get real mad you can hear them yelling at each other even outside the tank.

World Heritage Post

"can you be a fan of a video game you havent played" discourse is stupid, because plenty of people who played the game have some of the dumbest fucking takes ive ever seen

Like to charge, reblog to cast?

Somebody in a Twitch stream chat was trying to insult a streamer by saying, "You're almost 40, and you've only gotten a tarot card reading once?" And I don't know, I'm still amused by this. I'm in my late 20s and I've also only had a tarot card reading once. One of those ones on the street you pay for. The guy doing my tarot card reading was like, "You're going to join the military," or something like that, and 15 year old me thought to myself, "Okay, well that's not true. So I guess I just got scammed," and then I just never got a tarot card reading since then.

(military recruiter tarot card reader in august of 2001) *draws The Tower* *draws a second The Tower* now that's not supposed to happen

don't infantilise yourself. you are not a child who needs an adult to make your decisions for you. you are a splendid and magnificent autocrat and you are consulting your trusted advisors. you are exercising great wisdom by inviting an expert to give their opinion before making your ruling. often the path of wisdom is to say "good morning, I'm trying to [perform task] and I have a question about [aspect], can you tell me who I should speak to for advice?" before you do it. sometimes the path of wisdom is to hire a plumber. there are times when you cannot do things for yourself but that doesn't mean you are not an adult. you don't need a grown-up. you need a specialist.

was talking to an ex friend once about being disabled and was like “yeah, the government wants me dead” to which she responded “noooo dont say thatttt that’s not true :( “ and i just need people to fucking think critically before saying something they think will be comforting because what the fuck do you mean the government doesn’t want disabled people dead have you never fucking heard of EUGENICS