SolarEmerald

When I was growing up and transitioning, it was understood that trans women were more vulnerable to bigotry as just an observable fact. It was unspoken.

I have been hurt by transphobia sure but it was never because I was specifically FtM. What I mean by that is this -that people who hate trans men ALWAYS hate trans women too.

Yet I have met many cis people who don't mind trans men but LOATHE trans women, seeing us as 'quirky gender outlaws' while still viewing trans women as predatory men invading some 'sacred female space.'

Example: no one ever bothered me for presenting masculine things at work, even when my beard was too long for our work standard.

Yet the day my freshly-out trans femme coworker wore tights to work, her department manager pulled her aside within an hour of her clocking in and made her go home and change!

The cis girls were never bothered for wearing tights even if they were wearing colors/styles that were against technically against dress code.

The same HR lady who helped me change my legal name in our employee roll did nothing to help this girl when I reported the manager who singled her out. Even speaking up for her got me labeled as being 'dramatic.'

She quit within the week, it was awful. ( I am glad to report she got a better job and recently got her legal name change and is four years on E at this point! )

I've had to cut ties with many people over them saying weird shit about trans women to me, that job being one of those ties! I was there for five years but seeing what happened to the girl made me lose all my faith in their 'inclusive' claims, so I left.

If you don't want my trans women peers around, you don't get my trans masc self either! That's how it should be.

All trans men must practice zero tolerance for transmisogyny otherwise we can never expect trans girls/women to buy into claims of solidarity from us trans men. The world is coming at the girls from all sides, we shouldn't be adding onto their stress by repeating rainbow-flavored TERF talking points.

It says a lot that the public generally perceives us (trans guys) as ready to agree with the whole "lol trans women are freaks, amiright??" Bullshit.

The reputation is there because many trans men are too chickenshit to speak up for their sisters. At worst, they agree with the transmisogyny.

I have been trying to educate the younger men about why TME vs TMA is needed in trans discussions but it has been an obnoxiously uphill battle. Many do not want to listen.

Your page is a great resource for breaking down the aspects of transmisogyny that trans men miss or don't consider, thank you for putting it up. It gives me the language to dismantle transandrophobia arguments.

This issue is something older trans men need to get active in correcting this behavior. Trans men have to teach our younger bros to be better than this otherwise it will keep spreading like redpill shit did among cis dudes. The fact that so many trans women are doing the emotional labor of educating these buttheads isn't fair and I don't blame all of you trans femmes for being frustrated.

Sending this privately because I don't want to seem like I am stating my peace for clout.

You rock ✌️ and don't let the bastards get you down.

Second chapter is here, this fic is now complete!

Kralsei songfic based on Frank Iero's 'She's the prettiest girl at the party and she can prove it with a solid right hook'

Word Count: 13.7k

Summary:

Just know that the best that I'll ever be Is whatever you make me and wherever you are The Angel is always cruel. Ralsei turns to Kris for any indication that it's not how they actually feel. And while it isn't, they are largely apathetic to Ralsei. And Ralsei soon realises he's setting himself up for heartbreak.

I'm gonna bet on chapter 6, and here's why:

1) Ralsei did not have a whole "oh I don't know could I really be a girl? that never occured to me" moment - ie, as others have pointed out she's not an egg! She's closeted. So at least she isn't unaware of the desire to be a princess

2) We got two direct drops for the word 'princess' straight up, no beating around the bush, once by Ralsei admitting she would like to be one and once by Flowery calling her one while handing her a trans flag, something she does not deny or get mad about. And by the end of the chapter, the pronouns are updated! This is already in motion, she is Already changing how she wants to be viewed, just feels more like taking careful steps rather than jumping in headfirst.

3) We have unfortunately seen enough of what happens when a transfem character's arc ends in transition. The arc is taken fully out of the author's hands to dismiss it, to deny transfemininity, to claim it came out of nowhere and made no sense, to claim the character wouldn't have wanted that (as if characters just exist in an alternate reality with their own wants outside of what they're written as and the author is just there to report to you what happened. Lol. Lmao). I think overall, Toby is not only a good writer, but crucially a cognizant one.

He's very in touch with how fandom and audience reception works and he has time and again done things to nudge any particularly egregious interpretations away (see, tea theory gaining popularity → rotten tea → Ralsei's tea healing more after the ch4 it's okay not to smile scene) (see, Ralsei is just Asriel theories gaining popularity → scene with Ralsei saying how they like their face even if we think it's similar to [Asriel] and Kris laughing it off like it's ridiculous → scene with Kris pointing out to Susie quite insistently how different Asriel and Ralsei look → scene with Asgore being like yeah I thought so at first glance but actually not really).

I think Toby is well aware of how transfem arcs can get dismissed and he's treading the line well already. We aren't doing a 180, we're setting the scene for it slowly but firmly: establishing the flags, the lost girl motif, the double princess mention. It's a good progression and in the same chapter where she's called princess and says she would like to be a princess we also encounter mad mew mew/pink AND we see Ralsei change pronouns to they/them.

It's already moving the train has left the station. We are mid-transition.

everyone needs to hear about the situation in india right now. the youth of this nation are going through hell and back to protect the foundations that our country was built on in the first place, while the adults who are supposed to actually be in charge try to silence our voices.

NEET, which is an exam taken by millions of students per year and is the ONLY gateway for medical admissions across the country, had its papers leaked. so many took their lives because this exam meant everything for their future. and NTA, the agency who conducts this exam, was not held accountable.

there was national backlash. cockroach janta party (initially a satirical political party formed by abhijeet dipke in retaliation to the remarks of the chief justice of india calling the youth "cockroaches" and "parasites of society") started protests at jantar mantar, demanding the resignation of the union education minister, dharmendra pradhan. the movement also asked for ten million inr (~100,000 usd) in compensation for the families of students who died by suicide and wanted NTA be held accountable.

sonam wangchuk, a climate activist and education reformer, also went on a hunger strike at jantar mantar to protest against this corruption in india's higher education system. his fast began on june 28, demanding the resignation of the union education minister. his fast lasted for 20 days until delhi police FORCIBLY removed him and admitted him to safdarjung hospital on july 18.

because of this, cockroach janta party announced "chalo sansad," a march to the parliament beginning on june 20th, 9:00 am ist. but the police seems to be responding with water cannons, mobile jammers, and baton charge. all of this, because of a peaceful protest led by people no older than 30.

A transmasc drag queen made a call-out post about how a newly-out local trans woman is a sexual predator. (The sexual offence was that, 6 years ago, before she came out, she was at a drag show with the drag queen (who was her friend at the time) and joked that the drag queen's makeup looked a bit like semen.) The trans woman spiralled, got drunk, got hit by a car, and is currently in hospital.

A newly-out trans woman and a trans man met at a local trans support group. They decided to meet up again at a local pub. She apparently asked questions about his transition that he considered invasive, and in a voice that was too loud and risked outing him to other people in the venue. She now faces being banned from the support group.

The only trans woman who volunteers to run that support group is being kicked off the team by the trans man who is in charge of it. The reason is that she once told the guy in charge to "stop talking" when he was giving her several instructions at once, and also that a different transmasc volunteer has said they find her "creepy" and don't want to be alone with her.

All three trans women are autistic, isolated, and don't have much practice with irl socialising. Maybe they're a little bit loud, maybe a little bit abrasive, maybe they misjudge the appropriateness of sexual comment to a friend at a drag show, maybe they're too keen to make a new friend that they get excitable and speak too loud and ask too many questions, maybe they get overstimulated by being told too many instructions and need you to stop for a second to give them space.

Maybe their behaviour that you consider weird and unsettling is actually a trauma response to a childhood and adolescence of isolation and bullying.

And you know what the funny thing is? I have been sexually harassed at a drag show by the drag queen in (1), who was performing and making sexual jokes about various people in the audience. I have been in a public place with the trans man in (2) while he asked me loud invasive questions about my HRT regimen and about child abuse I suffered. And I have been misgendered and deadnamed repeatedly by the trans man in (3).

And do you know what I did about any of these things? Nothing, beyond saying "Hey, I'd appreciate if you don't do that next time 👍 No hard feelings 🙂". Because, not only am I aware that people make mistakes, and I consider trans men and transmascs a vulnerable demographic and it would be a totally unjust overreaction from me to attempt to socially isolate them for these offences.

But also, I don't have the social power to do anything about these things anyway, even if I wanted to. My normal response to experiencing even serious abuse at a queer event is to simply stop attending it, isolating myself, and perhaps telling a few close friends about it. Because I already know that my complaints will not be taken seriously.

▲

As a reminder, he's suing Caroline Wallner, one of his accusers, for breaking her NDA. Not for libel. He's saying she shouldn't have told anyone about it, not that she lied.

He doesn't need the money. He's risking the Streisand effect. He is punishing Caroline, he's trying to intimidate other victims who have signed NDAs to scare them into continued silence.

He is no friend to women, to the LGBTQIA+ community, to anyone quite frankly unless he thinks they are of value to him.

Mettatonmay day 2 prompt: Cake