¯\_(ツ)_/¯

You mean Doug Dimmadome owner of the Dimmsdale Dimmadome?

That’s right Doug Dimmadome owner of the Dimmsdale Dimmadome.

Wow I’m your biggest fan, Doug Dimmadome owner of the dimmsdale dimmadome!

THE Doug Dimmadome, owner of the Dimmsdale Dimmadome where they’re showing Crash Nebula?

On Ice

so my roomates girlfriend just caught me in the kitchen and its so hard to play it cool when you never see this person you only hear her yowling like a cat in heat while her asshole gets played with so me, trying to act as casual as i possibly could, forgot i was holding an onion and not a delightful apple and bit into it fully expecting a honeycrisp but instead got the equiv of biting solid piss 

lol wtaf. i can’t read a single word of this paragraph

whole foods employee catches me stealing valuable artichoke water and tries to apprehend me but i quickly jump through one of his gauges and escape