Summary: You were always in Bella’s shadow even though you loved her as she was your big sister, but will Jacob ever look at you like he does Bella? Will someone else heal you
Pairing: Jacob Black x f!reader, Paul Lahote x f!reader
Includes: angst, comfort, fluff
I stumbled through the woods, so dark I could barely see the only light was from the moon above helping guide me but I stop, a deep guttural growl comes from in front of me, my heart pounding in met with yellow eyes in the darkness
I don’t move as it approaches and I’m met with a wolf, a wolf so big it towers over me, ready to feel the attack of this unnatural beast I hear voices
They’re faint but I can hear them calling my name, it sounds like……Leah and Seth and Bella and Dad
My eyes shoot open and I see everything is fuzzy, I blink a few times trying to collect myself as the picture becomes clear, I’m in the hospital I look around seeing all the voices I heard were here with me…..it must’ve been a dream, but that wolf I couldn’t get it out of my head
“Oh thank god we were so worried” Leah sighs as she squeezes my hand
“What…..what happened out there babygirl?” Charlie asks and I can see he’s worried sick
“I….i don’t know we were hiking and everything happened so fast I just remember…the pain” my hand comes up shaking as I go to touch my face but Bella stops me
“You were attacked by something, maybe a bear”
“Yeah you got some gnarly cuts there but you’ll look badass now” Seth beams trying to lighten the mood I try to smile but it hurts, the pain radiating from the side of my cheek all the way down my throat to my collarbone
I sigh looking to Leah again
“What about Paul is he okay? Did the animal get him too?” They all look at eachother
“Paul got away, none of us have seen him but Sam says he can’t see anyone right now” she says
“But he’s okay right?” She nods brushing my hair back soothingly
“Sam found you, said you were bleeding out and ran you all the way back to the Clearwater’s and got an ambulance” Charlie said running his hand through his hair stressed
“I’ll have to thank him but…..when can I go home, I wanna heal at home” Charlie nods leaving to go talk to the doctors
“Tell me do I look hideous” I try to joke but I feel a terrified knot in my stomach
“You’re still my beautiful bestie”
“Yeah now you just look even cooler” we all sit in silence for a bit after they helped me sit up
“Did Jake come to see me!”
“Yeah he came by and left you flowers” Bella said as she brushed out my hair for Leah to braid to get it out of my face
“He said the other guys wanted to see you too so they’re throwing you a welcome home party tomorrow, it’ll be at La push!”
“Really they wanna do that for me?” I felt touched knowing the guys actually cared
“Of course you know they adore you, you’re one of us” Seth said as Charlie came back in with the doctor, Leah finished off my braid and the doctor gave me instruction for cleaning the wounds and to come back in if anything bothers me
We pack up, Leah helps me change and we head home, Leah and Seth said they’d come by in the morning to check on me
I sigh relaxing in the car as Charlie drives us home, still exhausted from the blood loss, the car ride goes by quickly as I stare out the window and the subtle sound of rain patters against the windows
“We’re home kiddo” Charlie says as he opens my door giving me a hand steadying me as we walk up the stairs to the house
“Oh someone left you a gift” Bella said as she picked up the brown wicker basket laid next to the door, we walk into the house and Charlie leads me to sit on the couch
Bella sets the gift next to me and I feel a warm thrill run through me not even knowing who it’s from yet
“Well go on open it!” Charlie says as he sits in his recliner
I pick up the card placed on the top, opening it to a white card with butterflies as it says get well soon, inside it read
‘I’m so sorry I could protect you, just trust me and give me time I’ll explain everything to you when I can, for now I hope this gift will hold over until I can properly apologize, get well my pretty girl’
My heart flutters again, which I’m realizing only ever happens because of Paul, I look into the basket where so many gifts laid, first there’s a grey wolf stuffy, a hand made dreamcatcher, a book from my favorite author, a blue and brown beaded bracelet with a wolf charm, then at the bottom is a hoodie, his hoodie I knew because he always wore it, I pick it up and hold it to my chest already being able to smell him on it
“Soooooo who’s it from, they sure went out of their way!” Bella asks as she helps me pull the hoodie on
“It’s from Paul” I smile cuddling the stuffy and put on the bracelet, how come I never saw him over Jake, in the past few weeks Paul has made me feel more seen than Jake ever did
“Good kid, he must’ve done something to fight off the animal if it didn’t get at you” Charlie says as he turns on the tv to the fishing channel
“Yeah he’s…..he’s nice” my smile eases as the exhaustion takes over and I fall asleep curled up on the couch feeling like I’m wrapped around by Paul
I was on the woods again alone, the sun setting as I wander aimlessly when I feel a chill run through me and that odd feeling that somethings watching me
I turn to see a grey wolf with amber eyes the same size as the black wolf I saw before, but this time I didn’t feel fear I felt comfort, peace
As it approached I lend my hand and he tubs his head against me, it felt so real, the emotions and the feel but those voices come back again, calling my name in the distance
Drowsily I open my eyes coming face to face with Seth, with that usual wide smile
“There she is! what were you dreaming of?”
“Oh….ive been having these strange dreams about wolves”
“Maybe it’s just loopy dreams from the drugs and blood loss” Leah says as she sits next to me as she starts to clean my wounds
“Maybe…..I still haven’t seen the damage yet”
“Are you ready for that?” Seth asks as he hands me a chocolate chip muffin freshly made by Sam’s wife who I’m yet to meet
“I have to be, it’s not gonna go away” i say as i bite into the muffin
Leah throws away the gauze and I feel the sting of the cleaner as I walk into the bathroom and they stand in the doorway, I suck in a deep breath as I get the courage to look into the mirror and I’m horrified
Three gashes down the right side of my face and neck
“Oh my god, I look awful if Jake didn’t look at me before now he definitely won’t and no one else will”
“Hey don’t say that you look beautiful, we know a girl she’s been through an animal attack too maybe it would help if you talk to her”
“Yeah it would help to know how she dealt with this” the nod and we head out, Leah drives and I sit between her and Seth
“Isn’t that Paul’s hoodie?” He asks pulling on one of the strings
I feel a blush dust across my face as I nod
“Yeah he left me a gift on my door step”
“Well wasn’t that nice” Leah smirks nudging my arm
“Oh stop he was just apologizing” but deep down I felt something blooming
We pull up to Sam’s house, I rarely ever come here especially since he’s been married it must be his wife that we’re talking to
We walk inside and it smells of fresh baked goods, it’s homey in here
“Emily! You in here?!” Seth calls out and from the back room a beautiful girl comes out, long black hair and almost identical scars as mine
“Hey guys I didn’t know you were stopping by!” She looks at me her eyes soften
“You must be y/n swan I heard about what happened……I’m so sorry hun”
“Oh uh thanks, I’m sorry to you too” she smiles as we sat around the table
“She’s having a hard time dealing with it, we thought you guys could talk” Leah states taking a cookie
“Well when it first happened I didn’t know what to do with myself, I thought I looked like a monster and it took a while for me to accept what happened and move past it, thankfully I had people around me who were supportive and well Sam….he was a dream always reassuring me how beautiful I still was, it’ll get better hun” her words seeped into my heart and I thought if she could still find someone to love maybe I could too, but it’ll still take some time to get use to it
“Thanks Emily that really helped, hopefully I can find someone that’ll still love me like Sam loves you” she smiles with some kind of knowing look
“You will, he might even be closer than you think”
We continue to chat for a while until after lunch, we decide to leave and get ready for my welcome back party, we say bye to Emily and leave walking down the steps when we hear laughing from the tree line across the field
The three of us look and it’s Sam, Paul and Jared, just seeing that Paul was alright filled me with so much relief
I start jogging before I even think about it, somethings pulling me to him, the guys finally notice me and their happy aura fades
I’m mere feet infront of Paul and it takes everything in me not to jump into his arms
“Paul I’m so glad you’re okay, and thank you for the gift basket I love it” I say motioning to the hoodie and from the corner of my eye I see Jared smirking and Sam is on high alert for some reason
“I’m glad you liked it” he stepped closer his hand rising not touching my wound but hovering as it leads down till it ended
“God I’m so sorry, I can’t believe this happened, I’m suppose to protect you” Sam lays a hand on his shoulder and pulls him back
“Breathe Paul” I’m still confused but all I can focus on is that he was so emotional about protecting me
“Umm are you coming to my welcome back party tonight?!” I ask trying to ease the tension
Paul looks at Sam with pleading eyes and I can see the whirlwind of thoughts in Sam
“Please” Sam sighs and nods
“If you feel even a sliver of anger you leave you got it”
“Great, come to the beach at 7 I’ll see you there” I lean in quickly and leave a kiss to his cheek before I turn leaving back to Leah and Seth who’re leaning against the truck smiling
We pile in and Leah pulls away driving back to their place
“Soooo what was that about?” Leah pokes my side
“I don’t know what you’re talking about”
“Oh come on you totally just made a move on Lahote”
Seth leaves us for a while to help Harry with the fish he caught this morning so it was just some girl time in her room
“Can I ask you something” I ask as I go through her closet to pick something out to wear to the party
“Do you think it would be wrong of me to try and move onto someone else, I mean the whole tribe basically knows I was infatuated with Jacob, would they think I’m just hopping around?” I ask as I pull on a pair of her leggings and keeping Paul’s hoodie on
“What! Of course not, we all know what kind of person you and no one would think you’re a player, as if you could be” she smirks making us both laugh, I hiss as it stretches my stitches
“You know I’ve never seen Paul so emotional, he’s always so macho”
“He probably just feels bad seeing as he has to look at the injury I’m left with”
“Yeah but now you can use that to get your way”
“You know I could milk that, I just hope he doesn’t blame himself much, plus he must’ve done something for me to still be alive and scare the animal away or something”
We finish getting ready and meet Seth at the door, he’s practically bouncing off the walls to go
“Be safe kids and don’t be out too late it’s getting dangerous out there with all the people going missing”
“We will mom!” Leah says and we leave only taking a short drive till we’re at the beach, walking to the usual spot we hold fires I was expecting a bunch of people, all the guys and a bright energy but at the fire only sat Jake and Bella
“Umm are we early?” Seth asks just as confused as me
“No we’ve been waiting, no one’s been here yet” Bella says giving me a warm smile trying to reassure me
“I’m sure they’re running late or have a big surprise” Jake says catching onto my saddening mood
“Oh yeah I’m sure” I sigh sitting on the drift wood as Seth and Leah sit on either side of me, they start the fire and we just sit there waiting, idle chit chat as the sun sets and the night gets chillier
I keep looking waiting to see Paul, anyone else too at this point
“I’m sorry sis, we can make it up to you, I’m sure there’s a reason” Bella says as I keep my attention on the marshmallow burning on my stick
“It’s fine” I say throwing the stick in the fire
“I wanna go home” Bella nods and we snuff out the fire and all head to our trucks
“Sorry girl, we’ll have a fun sleepover this weekend and order pizza and watch movies and everything!” Leah says giving me a hug followed by Seth
“Yeah I’d like that” they get in her truck and leave, so it’s just me Bella and Jake
“Come on it’s getting late” we drop Jake off then we arrive home
“Hey baby girl how was your party” Charlie asks, my lip wobbles and I go to my room as I hear Bella tell him no one came
I slump on my bed and pull out my phone and dial embry…..no answer, then I suck up the courage and call Paul, it keeps ringing but then I hear his voice
“Paul…..where were you?” I ask quietly feeling that knot in my chest again trying to keep the tears at bay
“What are you……oh shit y/n I’m so sorry I forgot I got caught up in something”
“Oh I guess I understand”
“Did you have fun though, must’ve been nice to get your mind off of things” and that’s when the damn breaks and I’m crying into the phone
“No one came Paul, I was so excited that all the guys wanted to make me feel better but I waited and waited and no one came but Jake and Seth and Leah”
“Oh pretty girl…..shit, god I wish I could explain this to you, I hate hurting you”
“Do you know where everyone else is? Did they forget too? Did they just not wanna see my mutilated face?” I sobbing at this point as all my emotions from this past week crash on me
“It’s not you trust me, just we need time, we need you safe”
“What’re you talking about Paul? Safe from what?” He sighs into the phone and I can’t handle it so I hang up and whip my tears, Bella’s leaning at my door with a worried look, she already has enough to deal with I’d hate to be more baggage
“We both need to get our heads straight, come with me tomorrow on a hike it’ll be nice” I think about it and decide shes right
Next part is gonna be crazy
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