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im screaming once I was just staring at myself for 5 minutes convincing myself that i wasnt that drunk then i threw up and was like must of been the food i ate

ME LMAO

do u ever just look at someone and get annoyed

gibbons are so…supremely pleasant creatures

They saw an opportunity and, by god, they fucking took it.

artists fuck better because we turn sex into art, masterpieces, mattresses become canvases where we can paint our love to someone with bodies.

its like, impossible to come up with anything funnier than the experience of seeing this post

pharoahs fuck better because they ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh put the pussy in a scarmophogoghs

no offense but if u just straight up drink milk then I will never listen to a word u say to me

me every time i spend over $50 on something, no matter how worthy of my money it is: oh god. what have i done. what have i just done. what have i

becoming older than 10 years old was the biggest mistake of my life