Soupback Steaksoup

No one:

its a talking horse. you’d think this’d come with some kind of magical backstory about getting turned into one but turns out, they were just born that way. you find out their mother was a centaur, their fauther is a (horse-headed) minotaur, and they have a sister who’s a perfectly normal human

youre an orc guard in a fully garrisoned and protected fortress 2 miles into a mountain. you’re standing post and suddenly you hear a knock outside the door. you know you’re not authorized to move from your post but your curiosity overtakes you and you open the door. a horse is standing there. as your brain races to think of some explanation for the sudden and unexpected presence of this horse it leans in and whispers

“Why does Tumblr romanticize Hades so much?”

Me, speaking incomprehensibly about my niche interests

this image looks like chris evans is mulaney’s highschool bully coming to shove him in a locker

author’s note on fanfic ch4: i’ll probably have it updated by the end of this week!

author’s note on fanfic ch6:

im a guy, i have a mullet, im not butch, its just hair. i fully support everyone in the lgbt community