Rush hour…
Love your blog and your comments!! My wife has had one experience as a Hotwife. It was great, but then the guy flaked out. I think that threw her off. She hasn’t been open to pursuing another guy since. But, I keep trying. Would love to hear some tips from you or your hubby
Thank you.
I feel like consensual cuckolding relationships are unique to each couple. I'm not sure that what "worked" in our case would be applicable to others. But for whatever it's worth, here is a little bit of what I learned along the way:
My husband was super patient. Several years went by from the time he told me he wanted me to have sex with other men until I finally did it. He never expressed disappointment when I had good opportunities that didn't end up the way he hoped. He would just tell me how hot it was watching me flirt, or kiss, or whatever. He made it clear that any little thing I did with another guy really turned him on.
We did a lot of role play, both in bed, and out. He would ask me to imagine he was someone else, or call him another guy's name when we were fucking. And we would go out to a bar, and have me go in five minutes before him, then he would pretend to be a handsome stranger, buy me drinks and "take me home." (Warning: We learned you have to have some kind of story worked out in advance if you're pretending to be someone else. The first couple times doing that were pretty awkward.)
He bought me an anklet, of course. Many of them, actually, as the years went on. They're not magical studfinders. It's just a little indication to a guy that it might not be a waste of time saying hello to a woman who's wearing a wedding ring. And it feels pretty sexy when I sense that a guy is checking it out.
My husband is incredibly worshipful. I always know how much I turn him on, and I really love to reward him for making me feel so special. He literally kneels at my feet, kissing them, and my anklet, and tells me how much he loves having a sexy wife who fucks other men. Not a single day goes by that I don't hear at least a dozen times how beautiful and perfect I am, and how horny I make him.
We have a weird dynamic in that we live in a very, very small town, which limits me to only having travel sex a handful of times each year. For a long time, having kids at home was a big limiting factor as well. I think built-in limits like that are kind of reassuring. Nothing is ever going to get too crazy. I know I'm not going to fall in love with some dude I hook up with at a bar or party the way I might if he were a co-worker or someone I had constant access to.
One other thing: My husband does a ton of work finding (and creating) promising situations for me, but it's never like an appointment to have sex with someone. The fact that there's never any pressure, and no one has been promised anything specific is a big help to letting desire kindle naturally. My hubby is really good at helping me make conversation with strangers, and knowing when to see his way out when it looks like things are going well.
What else? You've got to be prepared to play safe with strangers, which really helps with peace of mind afterward. If you do have a basis to trust a partner who's not a stranger with unprotected sex, everyone needs to have had very recent testing. Some of the parties we go to put out strong encouragement for that in advance, so in certain situations (I imagine swingers clubs might be the same way), it's not as strange as it might sound to find guys who have fresh test results loaded in their phone.
I'm sure there are ten other things I'll think of after I go ahead and post this, but this is getting pretty long. It's a decent overview of what has worked for us for a very long time. Hope it helps a little!














