Sippin Tea

i’ll be honest with you i forgot that first man is a song that actually exists when i answered that, but my take is that it can either easily be a very straight washed version of a situation that could have happened with camila’s family and lauren, or it could just be a PR song.

some of these songs you just have to really listen to them. you need to ignore the one liners that don’t perfectly match up to lauren’s character. it’s what closeted singers do to get away with writing about their secret lovers. no lauren isn’t a bad dancer, but she IS a shy singer on occasion, she IS an overthinker, she IS camila’s right answer, she is—you know—probably a slow kisser.

i mean, to me it doesn’t make sense that camila would be asking her publicly known boyfriend that was always with her during the duration of their relationship if he dreams of her too, because it would be assumed they were literally sleeping next to each other every night. to me it’s about a long distance relationship that has been forced into complete secrecy, and camila is looking for reassurance from this person—lauren—that she really does love her, and dreams of her just like camila does when they’re apart for long periods of time and sleeping in different beds in different cities. because camila is not with lauren every day, she spends the whole day through dreaming of her instead.

not to mention, being a confessed sinner in the presence of camila is a very gay thing to say. like. lauren wrote a whole song about giving into sin and calling herself a sinner for a woman and camila wrote a whole song with a music video about giving into sin for a woman somebody.

also, camila was working on this damn song for so long that she teased it before the beach pics of her and ew even came out, and lauren basically joined in on the teasing, especially in the last two pics.

used to this was obviously marketed to be *the* showmila song, but it’s another camren song to me. it’s one of my favourites actually. sure, maybe there are a few PR lines like the san fran one but that easily could’ve been written about an experience with lauren during one of 5h’s many times to SF and used as a showmila line by making them do a stunt there where their kiss is conveniently caught on camera.

to me used to this is about lauren and camila’s second (or third idk) try at their relationship. camila spent so much time in a state of uncertainty with lauren that had her talking to the moon, but this time—which i consider the current one—things are different and it’s something camila wants to and can get used to. i think this is evident within so many lyrics in this song. camila actually stays with lauren past midnight, and because of that she’s whispering lauren’s name differently than ever before. camila’s heart is bleeding because lauren is asking her to stay for once. camila says that her and her lover were 17 when they started to fall, but they *lost it all*. this contrasts so greatly with the rest of the song that it tells me this isn’t their first try.

camila and shawn, within their very confusing narrative, don’t have that kind of history. they never acted on their feelings in any capacity until last june/july, and they were never 17 at the same time either. used to this is about a relationship with rocky past that was more about the physical feeling than what it actually meant, but has turned over a new leaf.

“ DO YOU REMEMBER GIRL I WAS THE ONE WHO GAVE YOU YOUR FIRST KISS” 😏😏