I wanna read more on polyamory and unlearning monogamous thought patterns because idk. Between being kinda devastated the girl I was crushing on (who is poly) getting a partner and my current not-partner-but-sister getting close and intimate with another person, I feel really clingy and idk, frustratingly jealous.
I kinda assume I'm the backline of affection and love for most ppl and it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy where I preemptively don't rly let myself fall for others and they see me as detached and move on
idek what i want out of relationships or love though and it's hard to tell whether any desire or longing is a result of a momentary mood or a larger desire













