Welcome To Constant Shame

after nearly two years of being locked outta this account i got the correct log in by complete accident what up everyone

i’ve been over at @sleepyespurr23 which is still definitely gonna be my main account (this account holds far too many dark secrets for me to continue actively using) but thought i’d stop by and see how everyone was doin

what’s tonight’s mood

Context?

Everytime I see someone’s edgy theory about how capturing Pokémon is wrong, I remember that time in Sinnoh it was explicitly stated that Pokémon approach trainers specifically to engage in battle and how it’s implied multiple times throughout the series that Pokémon engage in battle and competitions for their own prestige and it’s just a symbiotic relationship that a respectful trainer gets a career for helping raise a powerful Pokémon while the Pokémon gets access to stronger opponents and more varied experiences than it ever would in its native habitat

Also in the first episode of the anime Ash asks why a wild pokemon is attacking Pikachu and his pokedex says that wild pokemon are often jealous of pokemon with trainers.

#keep your edgy shit away from my pokemon plz n thx

Pokemon are miniature blood knights who love beating the shit out of one another and dream of joining professional fighting squads that go around beating the shit out of one another and I think that’s amazing

I feel like every single member of Team Plasma needs to read this.

乇乂ㄒ尺卂 ㄒ卄丨匚匚

Name a conspiracy theory superior in raw power to “there are no actual forests on Earth"

imma need some context on that cause WHAT?

“forests” = minuscule form of what trees on Earth can be, basically saplings “mesas” = not landforms, but petrified ancient tree trunks IIRC the theory goes that all forests on Earth were destroyed ages ago and it takes them ridiculous times to regrow, with those giant mammoth redwood trees just being the oldest ones that have grown the most

Who/what cut down the trees to make them mesas, for what purpose, and with what tools?

I’ve actually looked a little deeper into this, and the short answer is that humans cut them down with future tech. This theory is a sub-theory of flat earth, as it makes use of a lot of the same basic assumptions about the world, most importantly that our entire worldview is a construct created by the elite that controls our world from the shadows. By keeping knowledge from us, they can treat us like sheep without expecting resistance. Part of this theory is that we had advanced machines and supercomputers way back, even in the ancient times, and that all history older than about 100 years is a lie crafted by this elite in the wake of a nuclear war in the 1800s.

What would we use all that wood for, and where did it go?

Rock is wood. Or rather, wood becomes rock as it grows and the trees reach massive heights. They essentially mined the trees for useful minerals and metals, and for the construction of whatever secret structres they use to control us.

Steal dnd settings from conspiracy theorists every day bc this shit is too good

oh and when i was a year old, after i got my foot amputated my parents were pushing me around in a stroller at a street festival in miami and i was chewing on my foot or whatever and this street performer came up to us and was like “aw i bet that tastes good!!” and my dad was like “yeah look at what she did to the other one!!!!” and pulled back the blanket covering my left leg to show a stump with a huge scar on it and i’m pretty sure my dad terrified that poor man