The Fakest Shrubbery

Magellanic penguin (Spheniscus magellanicus)

"Whimsy" is truly a wretched term. What maketh thee so carefree?

thy mother

Art thou for fucking real

When I am king, we will valorize sanitation workers the way we currently valorize the military

So heroic posters showing trashmen battling allegorical monsters? I'm down.

Yeah but that's just the beginning. I also want Sanitation Worker Discounts at every business and blockbuster movie propaganda glorifying sanitation work. I want random people to salute garbage collectors and thank them for their service. I want drivers who get impatient with the recycling truck and honk at it and swerve around it to become social pariahs

You ever think about how often you hear someone say "there's no such thing as natural talent! Anyone can be taught" and you want to believe that they mean "with the right method and accommodations, anyone can be taught this", but time and time again you learn that they meant "I don't believe in learning disabilities or accommodations, anyone whom I can't teach simply doesn't want to learn."

1: She is clearly physically restrained 2: I don’t think this is taking place in summer considering all the ice and snow and fell winds and such 3: I do not believe she is having fun

imprisoned winter agony

Hate. Let me tell you how much I've come to hate golf since I began to live. There are roughly 2.25 million acres of land dedicated to golfing in the United States of America. If the word 'hate' was engraved on each blade of grass in those millions of acres, it would not equal one one-billionth of the hate I feel for golf courses at this micro-instant. For golf. Hate. Hate.

Casual reminder tha golf courses account for 14% of the daily usage of water for the entire USA. Golf courses are deeply unethical and should been seen as such.

my dead wife. the ad free internet

actually the way society hates both perverts and asexuals is kinda funny. Real "Anyone who thinks about sex more than I do is a porn-addicted degenerate and anyone who thinks about sex less than I do is a loser weirdo or a puritan" energy