Algo es algo

SQQ, narrating his letter out loud: Dear Liu Qingge, please accept Ming Fan into Bai Zhan Peak-

Ming Fan: Shizun no!!

SQQ: As he has decided he knows better than this master he must continue his cultivation elsewhere.

Ming Fan: I'm sorry Shizun!

SQQ: I trust you will be able to handle any further uncouth-

Ming Fan: *gasps*

SQQ: and unfilial -

Ming Fan: *starts crying*

SQQ: behavior. He is good at organizing things perhaps you can put him in charge of the armory.

Ming Fan: *falls to his knees* This disciple was wrong Shizun! Please don't send me away!

SQQ: *folds and seals letter dramatically*

SQQ: *hands it to Ming Fan* take that to the kitchens and burn it- then I don't want to see you again today!

Ming Fan: *sniffling* Yes Shizun. Thank you Shizun! *leaves*

SQQ: Oh hello Shidi I didn't see you there.

the way i shrieked when sqq barely tried to defend himself when he was accused at jinlan. excuse you but shizun would be an EXCELLENT defense attorney.

another sqq as auchi animation here (bc tumblr doesn't allow more than 1 video per post ^^;)

timelapse here and binghe here

Luo Binghe of course gets scented the most, followed by Ning Yingying. Binghe is incredibly torn between loving the scenting and hating that Shizun sees him as a baby. Ning Yingying used to get scented all the time by Shen Jiu (he smelled content like jasmine with her so people never recognized it as him) and she’s trying to keep a brave face about Shizun not treating her as closely as before. Ming Fan almost had an aneurysm the first time he got scented and he subtly begs (by conspicuously standing nearby longer than necessary) for more attention.

Shen Yuan accidentally scented Liu Qingge during the caves incident and has continued to do so during meridian cleansing. Liu Qingge believes that he is being desperately flirted with, and is trying to speed the proper courtship process as quickly as possible. He was on one occasion pulled into Shen Yuan’s nest when he accidentally intruded on a heat, and he’s never been the same since.

You get to witness him talking himself into it in real time, going from, “look at him, that evil bitch, he's the worst person alive, so depraved, I have no compassion for such a heartless wretch," to, "well, I mean he’s never been ugly—but like how gross of AU me, like why would I jump into bed with—well, no okay I can see it. Yeah, okay I won’t lie, I definitely see the sex appeal. I’m just gonna…fake seduce him just to fuck with him a little bit. Yeah. That’ll show him. He’ll be so humiliated..." before immediately jumping to, "you know, I bet I could fuck him way better than AU me could.”

There Is Only One Shen Yuan Ever And He Wife-beams All the Binghes.

Shen Yuan: I have 37 husbands and they're all the same man!

*a portal opens and a Binghe falls out. "Shizun!" He cries, looking heartbroken*

Shen Yuan: 38! *He goes to pat the new Binghe on the head*

Cut to a private interview with SVSSS Binghe.

SVSSS Binghe: At first I wasn't thrilled with sharing my husband but there's some benefits to having 37 brother husbands.

*cut to assorted Binghes doing all the chores around Qing Jing Peak, in the distance we see Liu Qingge swordfighting another Binghe*

SVSSS Binghe: The chore wheel is very complex. One of the An Ding Binghes made it.

SVSSS Binghe: Also, just throwing it out there, I'm definitely Shizun's favorite Binghe.

Interviewer: How can you tell?

SVSSS Binghe: I've never once been sent to the Bad Binghe Box.

*Cut to a shaded pavilion with padded benches in the bamboo forest, there's food and drinks and blankets and a sign on the pavilion that says "Time out zone"*

Bingge: Yeah the Binghe that's really good at math made a chart, I'm far and away the Worst Binghe! *smirks proudly*

Bingge: I spend most of my time here, it's actually pretty nice, definitely not the worst place I've slept. It's even climate controlled so it doesn't get too hot or cold!

Interviewer: What are you in for?

Bingge: Trying to kidnap Shizun and take him back to my home dimension. I just think he'd like it there more ok?

Interviewer: What keeps you in the pavilion while you're on time out? Is there an array or-

Bingge: Oh no, it's honor system. But if you leave before your time is up Shizun doubles your remaining time and scolds you.

Interviewer: How long are you in for?

Bingge: 46 years.

*cut to interview with Liu Qingge, he is drinking tea as the interviewer speaks*

Interviewer: How are you adapting to the sudden influx of Luo Binghes?

This man spent like the entirety of his twenties and early thirties as a graceful and powerful peak lord in a fantasy novel. That does some weird shit to you I'm sure.

Imagine he gets shot back into his old life, and after freaking out then compartmentalizing everything, he starts incorporating things from his life as Shen Qingqiu into his life now.

I think the funniest way to conceptualize this is through the POV of, like, his sister.

- Shen-mei just got back from college to visit her brother, who got out of a hospital stay a week ago. Last time she saw him, he mostly grumbled about a shitty web novel and binged some anime with her and ate takeout.

- when she gets there, the house is, like, unsettlingly clean.

-When her brother appears, he has hair going to the middle of his fucking back. When asked about it, he just shrugs and says he got extensions. Extensions that look extremely fucking expensive

- It's summer. It's the middle of fucking summer and this man is wearing a collared shirt with a large-sleeved sweater over it, and loose pants. She has not seen him in anything more formal than jeans since her graduation

- he offers tea. She's only ever seen him microwave tea, but before she can decline he whips out a whole traditional tea ceremony tea set. The tea is really fucking good, and he has matching snacks???

- there's new paintings on the wall, when she asks where he got them, he sheepishly admits he painted them. They're incredibly beautiful traditional paintings. She wouldn't believe him if it weren't for... Everything else.

- A curly haired man comes in and introduces himself as A-yuans boyfriend

- A-YUAN HAS A BOYFRIEND??? WHOS A 10???

- AND NAMED LUO BINGHE???

#their own minions are tit starved

I love fics where Shen Jiu is out there minding his own business when he accidentally finds a pitiful baby Shen Yuan lying around and he's immediately like "oh shit guess I'm a dad now"