
@theartofmadeline
hello vonnie
Noah Kahan
YOU ARE THE REASON
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

Origami Around

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@shrimpscampii

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?????????
❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓
I'm instituting a new policy of "if I can't easily read your crusty scanned PDF then I'm sending it back to you, telling you to get your shit together and save your .docx as .pdf, and causing snakes to manifest inside your house"
this but also if you are in accounting and you have an Excel file please do not save it as a PDF or take a screenshot of it and then paste it into another Excel file
I take it back whatever you have going on is way worse than what I was dealing with holy shit
@thesummoningdark hello?????
yeah no this is a real thing an actual human being said to me
Good afternoon to everyone in the notes having a horrible time! Y'all are fighting demons I never knew existed!! I think every person that makes you do stupid time wasting shit like this because they refuse to learn basic computer literacy should be fired!!

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escape
Item: Orb of Gorilla Summoning
have you guys heard about the greenland shark. some crazy shit happening there.
they are sexually mature at ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY YEARS OLD.
their (live!) young gestate for. wait for it. eight to eighteen (??) YEARS. can have up to 10 at a time. good grief.
longest lifespan of any vertebrate, up to five hundred years
toxic flesh
has giant eyes but is usually blind because of a weird little crustacean that's evolved to live on and eat their eyes. this doesn't seem to bother them much.
lives in deep cold water and has the lowest swim speed and tail-beat frequency for its size across all fish species. just generally lives life in extreme slow motion
largest genome of any shark
eats everything including moose and polar bears
ma'am you are delightfully strange and I'm privileged to share a planet with you
this post prompted me to refresh my memory on Greenland Shark Facts and this detail about how they feed goes so hard
just vacuuming up their unsuspecting prey. whole !
Good news good news good news! Recent research suggests the eye parasites do NOT blind them!
Dorota Skowronska-Krawczyk sits in her office, eyes fixed on the computer monitor in front of her. "You see it move its eye," says the UC Ir
I <3 you a normal amount Greenland sharks
They’re fucking. Ice Elementals.
So it’s very likely they diverged from other Sleeper Shark lineages during one of the Pleistocene ice ages, when thickening polar ice would have trapped certain populations in perpetual icy darkness for thousands of years. These are the descendants of the survivors of that.
Their flesh is toxic for numerous biomechanical reasons that directly relate to their ability to not only survive but thrive in waters that would literally freeze you or I solid.
Urea and Trimethylamine-N-Oxide
The Greenland shark accomplishes this using first concentrated Urea, which is a natural antifreeze and depresses the freezing point of the shark’s fluids; and TMAO, which stabilizes proteins against denaturation, both from the concentrated Urea and the crushing pressure of the deep.
Additionally, the Greenland Shark has 3 distinct Hemoglobin complexes in its blood, 2 of which are apparently specifically adapted to be unaffected by the high antifreeze concentrations. More research is needed here.
{anecdotally; once pulled from the water by fishermen, the shark allegedly persists thrashing and fighting for far longer than any other fish, and there are stories of the flesh itself continuing to twitch and move long after its apparent death, as the creature is butchered}
Their longevity is partially enabled by a highly derived genome: it is comprised largely of transposable elements, also known as “jumping genes,” which normally cause organisms to be more prone to Cancers, but, are also capable of self-replication; and amongst these, we have already identified over 80 discrete gene sequences dedicated specifically to DNA repair.
They’re viviparous, and the female reproductive systems are quite complex, including a system of villi to deliver oxygen to the developing pups. The variability in gestation time remains subject of ongoing study: how is this accomplished? What triggers it? Many questions; fewer answers.
Truly a remarkable and magical Beast of the lightless depths. It is an honor and a privilege to share this wet rock with you all 🫡
Been getting really into orange juice lately
#myjuice
just witnessed something devastating
guy on the subway with one ear pierced, little gold hoop. other guy on the subway very quickly and subtly googling "which one is the gay ear". it is not the gay ear. visible disappointment on his face as he puts his phone away.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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I have just found. the COOLEST website???
Lost Kitchen Scrolls
It has a huge variety of historical recipes from different regions, taken from manuscripts, transcribed and translated, and a whole section of notes about the context for the recipe. It's really fun and I AM going to try a couple of these recipes.
Look at how this lamb recipe is presented:
This is just such a fun way to learn more about historical foodways and discover traditional cuisine.
Look at all the filters you can use:
Maybe if I can forage some good blackberries this year, I can make a 300 year old recipe for blackberry wine!
Anyway. Check out Lost Kitchen Scrolls.
HEY. I’m on a RAMPAGE OF DESTRUCTION over here. Aren’t ya gonna FUCKING STOP ME?
source
something I really enjoy is that I've now seen like 4 or 5 variations of roughly this same video, all slightly different in their angles and timing while obviously being the exact same bunny and room, implying that this is a consistent and frequent behavior for this bunny instead of just a funny thing it did once that got caught on camera. I wish I could have as much raw unfiltered enthusiasm for anything as this little rabbit has for its dinnertime
BRING HIM BACK
oh thank goodness

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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me whenever the stars are visible