Ask me about my thought crimes

haters will see you on your stigmata grindset and be like "omg 🤢 he has the wounds of christ 🤢"

I am so sorry you had a traumatic childhood and it made you stupid on line. I was raised as a lotus flower and I smell like vanilla all the time

this happened months ago. i cannot keep it in any longer. a while ago i went on a porn site ive never been to and it asked if i was over 18 and i misclicked and said no and it automatically sent me to google images of puppies and kittens. i still cannot get over how funny this is.

it's not much but if you are a queer person who does not have a hotel or place to go for the hurricane if you can get to middle tennessee I can offer my apartment for a few days

i never wanna hear ohhh i drank too much wine i smoked too many cigarettes last night i feel awful. cultivate a european mindset. you just need an espresso. life is an alchemical process and you are the alembic

while I was sitting on my couch the other day, I got raptured up to heaven for a few minutes. God told me she wanted to show me something and took me to her room, and above her bed, there was a framed napkin sketch of a cat with a plaque like a museum. she told me humanity and existence was created for the purpose of sketching this image one day, that the universe was a code she ran which was exceptionally fast for her and only millennia long to the creatures it generated. it needed to be this way in order to generate the sketch, because for the sketch to exist, napkins needed to be invented, and cats needed to evolve, and pencils and humans and all of that needed to come first, culminating in the bored person who would one day sketch this piece, which was her favorite. the plaque said it was finished in 2014. I pointed out that this would mean the universe had been pointless for several years now. she said yes. we stared at each other for a few minutes. when I woke up I could taste cranberry on my lips

the problem with not having watched anime growing up is that when I watch anime now I am suddenly assaulted with psychic blasts in which I recognize the source for all mannerisms and aesthetics of my peers

you guys I am having a fucking moment over here because I just started hunter x hunter and I am faced with the strong possibility that my old enemy from study abroad based his whole personality on one of the characters

literally the first day I met him I was like “this guy talks and acts like he’s trying to be an anime villain” and somehow it didn’t occur to me that he was trying to be a specific anime villain.

he’s the guy from this post in which I really downplayed just how fucking weird he was because it distracted from the point of the story but oh my god. I swear to god he quoted lines from the show. he kept his fingernails filed into sharp points for slashing damage. he thought suddenly appearing behind you and grabbing you by the throat was a really funny way to greet you. do you know how much psychic damage I am taking from this revelation? do you know???? after our first fight he brushed himself off and said “oh what fun that was!” in this stupid voice, even though I’d kicked his ass. I can’t believe I thought I was maybe going to be murdered by an alcoholic hisoka kinnie. how do I un-know this.