I feel like having wings violently burst out of your back would just feel really good. Like itd feel awful but also itd feel really satisfying.

a pit of dread forms in your stomach as you parse my "evil baby on board" decal and realize you have a moral duty to rear end my vehicle as hard as you can

"it's just stress" oh thank god, it's just the silent killer that slowly kills you, perfectly harmless, no need to worry

Girls will deadass sit there and tell you a story that they were 100% the antagonist of lmao

Gays posting grindr screenshots

how does it feel to be the funniest person on earth

let's all go out and buy pink refreshing citrusy fruity sexually arousing drinks

you can just take it from their cart. its not their possession if they haven't bought it yet

if i were thrift shopping and you put your hands into my cart to take a unique handpicked item i was intending to purchase i would break your legs

used to think you were my bud but i got weiser