¯\_(ツ)_/¯

baby time

what order are you even supposed to read this in?

I don’t fucking know my man

The domestication of dogs started with a small number of particularly trusting, optimistic humans and a small number of particularly trusting, optimistic wolves looking at an extremely dangerous competing apex predator and thinking ”maybe it’s friendly.”

when my dad moved away from home he needed a place to live, so he went to look at this one potential apartment. the only questions the landlady asked him were where he was born and when. when my dad told him, the landlady pulled out this huuuge astrology chart book. she looked at it for a long time in silence and finally said, “acceptable”

this is funny and awful at the same time

[Extends my fist out to you. Something is enclosed within my hand] :)

[Opens my palm]

honestly if I survive the next 3 years of my life I will be impressed with myself

update: i did it

Death is basically the end of a really long chemical reaction.

it’s really august huh… like 8 whole months have passed……….. disgusting

bruce banner has 7 phds? thats so excessive.. if i met someone with 7 phds i would honestly just be like wtf is wrong with you? its not even the fact that it would take so much time and effort to get them its that there is literally no situation where 7 phds is necessary. thats never gonna happen. hes honestly gotta be so stupid to think for some reason he needs 7 phds.

this reads like a bitter scientist who is very jealous of dr bruce banner

this was ghostwritten by hank pym

Bruce Banner was broke as shit but really good at getting graduate assistantships/scholarships (less good at getting Real World Jobs) so he just went from PhD to PhD for like a decade, just churning out dissertations while weeping and muttering under his breath “i have no real-world skills i have no real-world skills i hAVE NO REAL WORLD SKILLS AAAAAAAHHH”

I guess that’s why he has anger issues. I can understand what so many years in academia has done to Dr. Banner.

Whenever he needs to hulk out he just thinks about his student loans.

a white girl is lost in the woods and is about to be attacked by a bear. “why cant we all just be friends, bullying is so stupid, stop bullying <3” she says to it. the bear stops. he is confused. how the hell did she just say <3 out loud

less than three. 

if one more person adds this geek ass comment i will make sure u have less than three seconds left to live