- patsy kensit: liam's strongest aesthetic to this day. came from money but by way of being descended from old timey graham greene type london gangsters so its like kind of punk rock still. 10/10

- meg mathews: hardcore lady. by all accounts made noel worse in every way. it's been twenty years and she is still NOT over him, #relatable. 10/10

- nicole appleton: was in the second best british girl group of the 90s. wrote that creepy song implicating liam in sex toy exploits. 10/10

- debbie gwyther: as a person, who knows. as a mastermind of solo careers, retired racing hound rehabilitator but for humans, and also my boss in a strange dream i once had, 10/10

- no new music

- tour?

- tour not as fun as the last one

- documentary about live 25 comes out, is actually good, causes my dash to be unusable for weeks

- a new brit award is invented called "special commendation for britain's specialest boy who's been on his very best behaviour all year long and we're all so proud" and liam is its inaugural honoree

- noel becomes thin again