tread with caution

“i miss everything,” she confesses, feeling a wave of relief hit her. she’s never managed to say these words aloud. “i don’t miss the fights or the last few months, but i just miss you, junhyung. god, i just keep thinking of you and sometimes, i wonder whether things could have ever been different or were we just destined to crash and burn? and it’s so fucking stupid because it’s over, i can’t change anything anymore and you broke my heart.” 

“so, why am i still thinking about the way you laughed that one time i told you that you were probably just the third cutest guy in freshman year? why do i wish that i could go back in time, so i could just experience those late-night dates, where we laid under the stars and kissed until the sun came up, one more time? i even miss just lying with you in your room, wearing one of your shirts, feeling safe and warm, knowing that you liked me the way i liked you. you probably haven’t noticed this but i kept that shirt. it’s here with me and it smells like you, but it’s fading and i should just throw it away. but i can’t. because i’ve erased all the pictures i’ve had with you, thrown out any note you wrote to me, deleted all the songs that reminded me of you and this is the only thing that makes us seem real. i’m scared that if i throw it away, all we’ll be is a memory in my head.” 

would you say you’ve ever loved me? 

yeeun bursts out laughing, clapping her hands together excitedly. “wow, a day for the history books - taeho giving me a pretty good compliment!” she exclaims, giving the boy two thumbs up. “as for my insecurities, i have none. i’m fucking amazing, duh.” 

“nothing! my life is pretty fucking fantastic,” yeeun jokes, shooting the older girl a wink, a kittenish smile on her lips. 

take two

this has got to be your modern day fairytale –– boy meets girl, boy and girl make out, boy and girl meet again, and they don’t know each other’s names! sort of like cinderella, if cinderella involved alcohol and loud music playing in the background. except, taewoong is far from a prince, he’s a red headed boy who couldn’t quite erase the memory of locking lips with a girl that had pink highlights on her hair. that and the added fact that he’s not here to ask her for a romantic dance.

almost naturally, the crowd around them busy themselves with something else, and they’re given some privacy ( or as much privacy as you can get at a party, really. not that taewoong minds ). “i’m glad,” he smiles, and this time it’s genuine. not just because she’d been a great kisser, but because he’d enjoyed their time outside of kissing as well. but taewoong’s not at all suave, and he’s not too sure what else would be the right move after this. so he thanks whatever power is up there, when the girl leans in.

it doesn’t seem platonic, and he’s sure it isn’t either, especially when their last shared memory together had been far from that. naturally he smiles, and he thinks he’s a little tipsy as well, the cup full of soju that he’d drank now lying around somewhere in the kitchen. 

memories of the night they’d first met come reeling in, and he remembers just how great it had been, definitely one for the history books. “yeah?” his lips are curved upwards, and he leans in closer, they’re inches apart but taewoong doesn’t make a move. he won’t unless he’s sure that she wants to kiss him as much as he wants to kiss her ( please, please, please, he mentally begs ). “i came over to tell you the same thing.” gently he touches the pink highlights of her hair, “i really like this. it’s cute,” his voice is lower, softer, so that she’s the only one to hear him.

it’s been so long that yeeun has forgotten that her heart could beat this quickly. she’s glad for the dark lighting because otherwise, he’d see her with her cheeks flushed (which, she knows, for a fact, that it’s not the alcohol that’s causing it.) quite frankly, yeeun likes him – or at least, the idea of him. she likes that they’re anonymous to each other, the fact that he never asked for her name, the thrill that comes with not knowing what to expect next, and best of all, she likes that he gives her the affection and comfort that she secretly craves. she doesn’t want a relationship, but she does want whatever this arrangement is and right now, she just wants to kiss him one more time.

fuck.

yeeun completely loses her train of thought and god, she even forgets how to breathe when he smiles at her and whispers into her ear, his voice soft, making her skin tingle. she’s half-tempted to ask him if her hair’s the only thing that he finds cute, but there are more pressing matters on her mind, like the way his eyes are locked onto hers, as if challenging her to take the first move, and how damn close he is to her. the world around her disappears, the music in the background fading to nothing but white noise. her stomach burns, a mixture of excitement and alcohol as the adrenaline slipping through her veins.

< toxic — yoori (past) >

These kind of events always exhausted Yoori, it was made for those far more open and talkative then herself and she found herself usually overwhelmed with all the conversations happening at once. Besides, ice breaker games always pushed the reluctant students to bring down the entire mood instead of letting them make friends and get along with their classmates at their own pace. It wasn’t long before Yoori completely checked out as she walks around, towering over most of her fellow students and wondering how Jongin was able to skip out of this. At least no one knew of their infamous relationship yet, though she was sure they would be required to show up to another event soon enough arm in arm. Her train of thought faded into the background as one chipper group of designer-clad girls all stood in a circle chattering about their major or something of the sort. But that wasn’t what caught Yoori’s attention, it was what one girl began talking about at length. The unnecessary aspect of the arts.

Spinning around almost on auto-drive she approaches the one talking, her eyes sharp as she took her in. Yoori notices the smile on her face falters and is replaced with something a bit more edgy as she introduces herself but Yoori glances at her hand but doesn’t shake it. “I apologize for eavesdropping but I could not help but overhear your opinion on my major being pointless.” Her expression void of any emotion, a habit when was serious. “Though I am unaware what extremely important major you could be trying to pursue, don’t you think looking down at what others intend to put their money and time towards is closed minded? Furthermore, it’s ignorant to believe that just because a job is not white collar or falls under your personal brand of important that it’s less necessary to society as a whole.” She was already beginning her spiel and she could feel the group that the girl was apart of glaring at her but she held firm, “you have every right to your opinion but during such public events like this you should show some restraint, for I am fine with hearing your self important speech. But what of any other arts major who is came to this assembly looking forward to pursuing their lifelong dream only to overhear their peer on their high horse looking down on them?” 

maybe it’s not an appropriate reaction but yeeun laughs. sure, she did feel the slightest bit of humiliation when the girl refused to shake her hand and she had taken it as a personal attack, already preparing her sharpest words as a weapon. but watching her continue to talk passionately about her major in such a serious manner cracks yeeun up. she genuinely just finds this situation so humorous – the fact that some random girl, whom yeeun knows nothing about, is feeling all worked up and angry over some comments she’d made. she doesn’t even know what major the girl is studying and at this point, she doesn’t care. yeeun flicks her hair over her shoulder and stares at the girl pointedly, an amused smile growing on her lips. the best part of it all is that yeeun knows that her judgements ring true, plus she has evidence to back it up, but she waits until the girl is done with her inane, nonsensical speech to defend herself.

“firstly,” yeeun starts, squaring her shoulders and looking the girl straight in her eye. she can tell that the people around them are starting to pay attention, even if they try to hide it; yeeun doesn’t blame them, a potential catfight between two girls would definitely spark her interest too. definitely much more interesting than finding out some stranger’s name, age, favorite color or whatever lame-ass trivia. “i don’t even know what you’re studying, so i don’t know why you’re taking this so personally.” she pauses for dramatic effect before continuing, “secondly, i’m just stating the facts. i’m not looking down on them, it’s just reality. sure, it may be some people’s lifetime dream, but they should wake up and realise that that that’s all it’s ever going to be – a mindless daydream. unless their dream is to be a poor and starving artist, of course. how many people succeed just because they study arts in university? one? two? maybe three, if that year’s special. you don’t earn money studying arts; maybe, you get to do something you like but then, in that case, what even is the point? just stay at home, watch some youtube tutorials, i don’t know, there are resources out there that you don’t have to pay for. so, yeah, i think art majors are unnecessary and a waste of money.”

< too little too late — junhyung (past) >

if there was anyone he came remotely close to possibly being in love with, he thinks it would be her. for starters, she was his type in every way possible, she was ambitious, headstrong, feisty and a little rude — there was no way he could take his mind off her, not when she became all that his heart wanted in the weeks after they got to know each other. ironically, he hadn’t fallen for her then, not even when they started dating. it was just a crush, tops, one that he believed wouldn’t last, mostly on his side, of course. it wasn’t until he got to know her better and unearthed the soft and warm side to her that she tries so hard to keep hidden, the side that got even more addictive than the spunky side he had gotten attracted to at first. 

things were great, in the beginning. his camera roll, a direct reflection of his mind, was filled with pictures of her. she was his muse, his partner-in-crime and best friend — he felt like he had found someone that fit him perfectly, like she was the key designed for his lock. unfortunately, he started realising that he might be wrong, even if he, for the first time ever, wanted to believe otherwise. things started going downhill when he began thinking about transferring majors, something she wasn’t in favour of, at all. he had never liked studying business but he did nothing about it before, when he had yet to discover his passion for film. he was only starting to learn more about the film courses in seongnam, when he found himself getting more and more drawn towards it, unable to ignore the flame burning in him. he knew then that he had to take charge of his own life and pursue what he truly loves.

he couldn’t tell anyone about it back at home. if his mother knew, she would never let it happen. instinctively, the first person he turned to was yeeun. he was excited to tell her about this decision but more so, to get her support, since it is a pretty big decision to make, especially if he had to do it behind his mother’s back. if he couldn’t get his family’s support, the least he wanted was for his girlfriend to be on his side. however, she did not seem to like the idea at all which led up to an argument before so again, he picks the easy way out and chooses to keep things to himself for as long as he can, only dealing with the consequences after.

and that is exactly why he is sprinting across the road at 9:58 pm, not even bothering to wait for the traffic lights to turn green, panicked gaze darting from his watch to the road ahead of him. in this exact moment, he was supposed to be with yeeun, celebrating their monthsary and he had promised to meet her at 8, which he could’ve made on time if not for the film and media studies talk getting delayed because the speaker was caught in a jam and certain members of the audience held him up even longer by asking stupid questions that they could’ve waited till after the sharing to ask. junhyung hadn’t told her that he was going to attend the talk before their date, he thought there was no need for that, since he assumed he could’ve made it on time and he didn’t want to set off another dreadful argument, especially on a special day. now, he’s terribly late and without a good excuse, the only redeemable thing he had with him was the cake he picked up along the way (though he’s not sure what state it is in now, after all the running he did). 

junhyung finds himself panting at the door outside yeeun’s dorm room, lightly knocking on it and bracing himself for an angry girlfriend on the other side. he scrambles to find a good enough excuse for why he was a whole two hours late though coming up with nothing, head empty as he makes his way in. “baby, I’m so sorry,” he blurts out, putting the cake down on the table, guilt washing over him when he notices the table of food she had prepared. “it’s all my fault, please don’t be mad.” he musters up his most apologetic eyes, inching closer to her to take her hand in his, “I’ll make it up to you, ok?”

if looks could kill, junhyung would be dead right now. yeeun stares at his hand in hers, then at his pathetic attempt at looking sympathetic and finally, the cake that he’s brought in, squashed beyond recognition. is everything a joke to junhyung? does he think a cake will magically make everything okay? this is too much to handle, and yeeun feels her eyes prickle with hot angry tears. she snatches her hand away, forcing herself to look away from him – god forbid he catch a glimpse of her in this state, emotional and vulnerable, knowing that it’s all because of him. he may be her boyfriend, but yeeun will not give him the satisfaction of knowing that he has so much power over her, that he can bring her to such lows.

if this had happened two months earlier, maybe yeeun would’ve forgiven him. maybe she would’ve turned the other cheek, brushed it off, pretended like it was no big deal, choosing to focus on the fact that he even thought to buy a cake, so that they could both have another good night together. after all, once upon a time, junhyung had been yeeun’s. . . saving grace. she’d never tell him, not then, not now, not ever, but he had been the best part of her days. junhyung gave her something to look forward to and she lived for the moments they’d spend laughing over some stupid meme or those ridiculously cheesy pick-up lines junhyung somehow had great knowledge of, the nights where he’d made her his own. yeeun doesn’t know what love is but she’s pretty damn sure what she felt for junhyung during those early days, lying in his bed, her head on his shoulder, her fingers dancing against his chest, was the closest she has ever been to it.

but this has happened one too many times and truth be told, junhyung has been anything but her favorite person the past few weeks. it had started with his sudden declaration, that he no longer wanted to pursue business and that his new passion was… film? god. it was like junhyung was deliberately trying to piss her off – did he know nothing about her? she was already ashamed over the fact that she had caught feelings for the school’s biggest fuckboy and now, she has to deal with the added embarrassment of him being a film major? sure, studying film might be cool or artistic or whatever, but yeeun just doesn’t understand for the life of her why junhyung was so willing to throw it all away for some useless major – his mother was ready to hand over the company to him, he had his entire life set out for him and to toss it aside like it was nothing. . . astounded her. (and a small part of yeeun is resentful. resentful of the fact that she had to fucking carve her own name, fucking find her own path when her parents never even looked at her as a potential heir and here stands junhyung, the world in his hand, abandoning it without even a second thought. “do you know how many people succeed in film?” she’d yelled at him during one of their heated discussions, “one in like a fucking million! are you an actual idiot?”)

just thinking about it upsets yeeun even more, and the lump in her throat grows, the unspoken words burning in her throat. she wants to ask him why he’s late, whether he even still has feelings for her; she wants to tell him how shitty he makes her feel, that she’s disappointed and hurt and upset and she wants him to promise he’ll be better. but yeeun is yeeun. yeeun doesn’t talk about her feelings, yeeun pushes them into a deep abyss in her mind, pretends they don’t exist and hides behind a thorny wall. “don’t be mad?” she scoffs, hoping that it conceals the quiver of her voice, her dam of tears on the verge of breaking, “okay, yeah, i’m fucking happy you took two hours to arrive! not sure how you’re gonna make it up to me this time. are you going to suddenly make two hours reappear again?”  yeeun’s voice drips with malice – her words are out to wound because in some wicked way, yeeun wants to hurt junhyung as much as he has hurt her.

yeeun laughs, a genuinely bright smile appearing on her lips. “does she even need to ask? of course she is.” her voice softens as she continues, “no one can compare to jo danbi, i’m so happy that i got to be friends with her. out of everything that little dickhead did, at least he did something right. and i know we’ve been through our ups and downs, and that it would’ve been much easier if she had just picked his side over mine, especially since she has known him since forever but she still never gave up her friendship with me. and i’m eternally grateful for that.” 

blackmail baby

@sgnyeeun

the world is razor-sharp and long-toothed, seething with acidic morals and nasty, violent urges, and jongin is no different; he feels the way gravity drags on his standards, eroding his sense of purpose and calm. all summer long, he managed to keep himself in check, locked away with a girl who expected the worst of him moreso than anyone else could imagine him capable of– and he’d been fine. it hadn’t destroyed him. but now, here, back on campus, back amidst the teeming masses, the swell of dizzying humanity, jongin is hungry for chaos again. he wants to break something again.

an easy pet target is a girl with too-high ambitions, her reach aimed at the clouds, when really she should be more focused on the mud below her feet. jongin had tipped a few scales away from her, unbalanced her order a little bit before, but either it hadn’t been enough to ruin her reputation with the high-collared investors she so wished to impress, or she just hadn’t felt the need to say anything about it. so jongin decides one night to hit a few more buttons, just to see what they do. just because he can.

he comes to the club with this sole purpose in mind, his phone camera at the ready, his sights sober and searching for that one face in the crowd, hoping for the worst. he’s not disappointed. she looks like she’s having a blast, she looks like she wants to die, she looks like she’s had enough alcohol for twelve people her size, and he doesn’t even try to hide himself as he steps closer to her and snaps a few pictures. the one where she’s holding a glass up is particularly hilarious. he catches her eyes and grins, unashamed.

yeeun needs a drink – or in fact, make it ten. today had been a piss-awful day; it had started with her credit card being declined at starbucks for no fucking reason, which had in turn caused her to be late to a banking networking event and finally, the cherry on top, an investor that she’d been talking to for the last few weeks had pulled out on sponsoring her women in finance club. he had given her a vague enough reason but yeeun had asked around, pressed the man to find out that he’d heard from kim jongin, a concerned classmate of hers, that she was unfit to run such a highflying organisation and that he’d the investor sent photo proof as well.

what the fuck? firstly, the man’s being a big fucking hypocrite because everyone knows that investment bankers party the hardest. the higher your position, the wilder the parties get. but whatever. she’s not one to stir up a redundant fight with a potentially useful contact. secondly, although it’s not particularly life-ruining, this just adds unnecessary trouble because now, yeeun has to call her father and their family lawyer and ensure that these photos are deleted and that the rumors aren’t spread any further. thirdly, what the fuck is wrong with jongin?  sure, she had heard rumors about him, but she never thought she’d be a target of it. after what had happened today, yeeun’s pretty sure he has marked a big red x on her back and god, jongin can ruin anything of hers but just… not this. sure, this one incident could be easily handled but only the devil knows how fair jongin can go.

maybe she’s being really fucking stupid by going out tonight but god, she just needs to forget and not worry for just one night. she’s a few drinks in when she feels something is off. as though someone’s eyes are on her. she tries to play it off by taking another shot, laughing as the people around her cheer her on – it’s all in your head, she tries to tell herself. but then, she sees the flash and the man behind the camera and she just fucking knows. speak of the devil. kim jongin.

<  some nights — hyunjae >

perfection was essential, if whatever he was doing wasn’t of utmost perfection, then it may as well be useless, ugly, unneeded and easily thrown away. this concept had been planted into hyunjae’s mind since he was a child, steadily growing into a life motto that he clung onto no matter how hard things get, no matter how badly he wants to just stop sometimes. he couldn’t, not when he was still miles away from being what his mother wanted him to be. it didn’t matter if he was sweating buckets, breathing ragged and on the verge of collapsing—he’ll stop when he deserves to. and right now, he doesn’t. not yet. he doesn’t know if he’ll ever be enough.

thoughts like that were only distractions though, so he decides to lock them up where they won’t bother him, regardless of the fact that they will only keep piling up until he explodes eventually. these thoughts weren’t enough to keep him from actually passing out, unfortunately. he tries not to let it happen too often, not because he actually came to the conclusion that pushing himself over the limit was a bad thing—no, far from it. instead, it was because he didn’t want anyone to see him in such a vulnerable state, not when he had a certain reputation to keep up, one that was spotless. the last thing he wanted was for his stupid mistakes to be known to everyone other than him, and even then he barely wants to acknowledge them himself.

so when he noticed a water bottle he definitely didn’t bring in right next to his own empty one, his first instinct was to throw the bottle to the wall and swallow his scream. looking back, he was glad the person didn’t show their face the first time they decided to do that, because he was fairly certain he would lash out at them instead, and they didn’t deserve that. after a few more incidents of this happening, with the sender being anonymous, hyunjae could tell that they didn’t do this for a good name, to be known as the good samaritan—somewhere inside, hyunjae hoped that this person understood what he was going through.

wanting to confirm his suspicions, and also because he was just curious on who would add hyunjae into their routines that seem to drag on until late hours, he lied down on the floor with his eyes closed, beads of sweat rolling down his forehead. his breathing was steady, as if he had collapsed for a while. and when he hears the door open and a presence hovering over him, he reaches a hand, grasping onto the person’s wrist.

then, he opens his eyes, blinking a few times as he tries to adjust to the lighting. even though he pretended to pass out, he did practice hard enough that he was feeling a little dizzy. “hey,” he starts, slowly moving to sit up with a groan as he kept his grip around the other’s wrist. “i knew you’d come again. you seem to never miss a day, honestly. it’s a surprise i’ve only caught you today.”

his tone wasn’t mocking, nor did it hold any malice. he merely raises an eyebrow. “why are you doing this?” he asks, despite knowing he should have started with a ‘thank you’ first. “it’s clear you weren’t doing this for nothing, at least.” he didn’t mean for it to sound accusatory, he just needed to know—if there was someone who truly understood.

okay, yeeun knows it’s very late but she can’t help the loud expletive-filled scream that leaves her lips. this is literally a scene out of a horror movie! jesus fucking christ, why did this boy have to suddenly grab her wrist and fucking interrogate her? why couldn’t he sit up and say hi like a normal person and not scare the lights out of her? fucking hell. yeeun’s heart beats rapidly against her chest, the adrenaline coursing through her veins and she has to take a few deep breaths to calm herself down. god. this probably took five years off her lifespan.

it takes her a few seconds to really register what the boy is asking and maybe because she’s just been stunned into silence, or the fact that she’s been studying for the last five hours, or that she’s caffeinated out of her mind, but she can’t answer. so, she just chooses to stare at him blankly, clutching her books close to her chest. and frankly, yeeun feels trapped. she doesn’t fucking know how to explain herself – how do you tell someone that you see them every day, passed out and you feel bad for them so you leave them water bottles hoping that it’ll make them feel a little bit better? or that he just seems to physically embody how drained she feels? these scenarios only happen in sappy korean dramas, not in real life. and in hindsight, yeeun realises that what she’s been doing is creepy, to say the least. she’d just never expected him to… catch her in the act. what if he thinks she’s some insane stalker who purposely visits him daily?

god. her head throbs painfully, the flurry of thoughts physically incapacitating her. yeeun hates being questioned, hates having to admit that she has feelings other than an insane need to be successful, so she gravitates back to her default mode of being defensive. it’s the easiest option. “i don’t know,” she responds, a little harsher than she intends it to be. “maybe i was just trying to be nice or that i just simply had an extra water bottle with me that i didn’t want to throw away, maybe i just felt like it.”

hyungwon never understood the appeal of clubs and gettingdrunk. all drinking does to him are regrets that he remembers the morning afterand the inevitable hangover that comes hand in hand. in conclusion for chaehyungwon, it is a waste of time and money (as if he’s not loaded anyway). butthat is the sober, sensible chae hyungwon talking. the intoxicated one? whocares! he’s young, no responsibilities laid out in front of him, and let themore responsible hyungwon do his thing the next morning.

this is probably why the more sensible hyungwon frequentlydenies going out to drink.

the music blasting from the speakers hurts his head, buthyungwon is too drunk to care. if there is still any remaining sensible self inhis system, he would be screaming and begging drunk hyungwon to get up,apologize to… yeeun, as how she introduced herself, and get a cab straight backto the campus since he cannot trust his legs that he will get home safely. buthow hyungwon chuckles and moving closer to the pretty stranger, responsiblehyungwon has retired for the night. “that’s the spirit!” his brown huesshimmers, hands thrown up in the air. and with the mention of a shot of tequila,hyungwon giggles. if his friends can see him right now, they would be embarrassed.

“yes! let’s drink the night away!” hyungwon focuses and shiftshis whole body to face yeeun, though he keeps on swaying to the music, he doesn’tmind or think about how he looks right now. “we’re all going to perish sooneror later; might as well have fun!!” it was the alcohol in his system talking,because he has never been this careless and talkative to a stranger before. allthe red flags and sirens should be ringing at the back of hyungwon’s mind, buttonight he chooses to steer clear away from them.

yeeun loves hyungwon. yes, she did just meet him and yes, they might have only shared like three sentences with each other. but that’s more than enough for her because he’s up for a fun time, he’s down to drink more with her, he’s saying slightly nihilistic things that yeeun agrees with (because live fast, die young!) that’s more than she can say for the people she came to the club with. “that’s the fucking spirit!” she cheers, letting out a burst of excited laughter as she easily calls the bartender over and orders two more tequila shots. with expert ease, she licks the salt covering the glass before downing the shot and sucking on a slice of lime. “your turn!” she exclaims, nudging him lightly as if egging him on.

but yeeun notices that he’s rather unstable on her feet and he’s swinging his hands in a very uncoordinated fashion. a small part of yeeun knows that she should be more cautious for him – he’s clearly more inebriated than she is and she’s not even sure if he came with friends. how is he even going to get home? but she’s never one to be rational, especially on a night out and with a stranger who’s equally as intent to have a good time.  so, she ignores the thought in her mind, simply presuming that hyungwon will just, you know, teleport home. (yeeun also has somewhat conditioned herself to call an uber after leaving clubs – she’s not sure how but maybe it was after the twentieth time out that her fingers just knew how to click ‘home’ on the ride-sharing app. and there has been many mornings where she woke up in her own room, unsure of how she even got there. so, she just assumes hyungwon is like that too. drunken logic is admittedly slightly flawed.)

calm and rational was one thing but internally screaming was another and that was exactly what miyoung was doing. she knew that if she just let it go, not only could it freely roam the hallways of the dorm, but she may even see it again in her own room. she mouthed ‘i’m sorry, mom’ because she knew her mother would save it and she would be slightly upset with her if she was still here but they’d both feel a little bit safer (at least yeeun would) if the spider was just eradicated from existence. it was huge and who knows? maybe it even bites. so, she sighed and turned to grab a broom.

grabbing onto the broom handle, she moved it so that the broom part was up in the air and quickly hit the spider, causing it to fall to the ground. she quickly hit it a few more times until she saw that the arachnid was on the floor but not moving. she looked at it for a few seconds and nodded her head.

“o-okay, more likely than not, it’s not alive, anymore.” she said, leaning the broom against the wall. “and just to make sure that it won’t come back if it is still living…” she looked around for some sort of paper or a vacuum that she could use to suck it up into it. shit… only paper towel. she quickly tore a big piece off and walked over to it, her face scrunched in disgust as she bent down to pick it up.

“ew, gross…” she was unable to hide her disgust in her face and her actions because, with her free hand, she waved it around in disgust. walking to the bathroom, she opened the door and dropped the spider into the toilet, quickly flushing it.

yeeun’s fear was one-hundred percent justified.

at one point, yeeun genuinely wondered whether miyoung was human. listen, no normal person should be able to kill and dispose of such a monstrosity so easily. she’d stared with unabridged disgust, feeling mildly nauseous when miyoung had whacked the spider with the broom and the way she’d picked it up. . . was she like an expert or something? hmm, yeeun thought as she watched miyoung skilfully disposed of the arachnid’s corpse, maybe yeeun should hire her to be her personal insect killer.

but to hear that brief repulsed remark from miyoung woke yeeun up from her little daydream and honestly, it was quite relieving to know that miyoung wasn’t some fearless daredevil. letting out a sigh of relief, yeeun beamed gratefully at the older girl. “thank you,” she exclaimed, throwing her arms around the girl to give her a big hug. “i owe you one!”

she glanced quickly at the digital clock on her study table – this whole debacle already took up half an hour and since she didn’t have anything urgent to do today, it seemed appropriate to thank miyoung in a way she knew best. “do you want to grab some supper? or share some hot chocolate?” she suggests. “i know it’s late, but why not!”

despite his usually cross mood and prickly temperament, it’s not that taeho unconditionally dislikes cuteness… i mean, have you seen his cats? they’re fucking adorable, and he certainly has no problem letting them know (and yes, for the millionth time, he understands that they aren’t exactly ‘people’). still, there’s an appropriate time and place for every act, and when it comes to being ‘cute,’ there’s definitely an appropriate person to do it too. he thinks for most people, the acceptable window for actively trying to be cute closes once they hit age ten, with only the rare exception. he couldn’t really even tell you who qualifies for one of these free passes in his book, but what he can tell you is that she — baek yeeun — does not and should not get one. like what the hell? i mean, objectively she’s kinda good at it, having the whole pout and ’oppa’ voice down pat; but that just makes things scarier. it’s so fake. does she practice in her free time? why? for whom? ugh. his nose crinkles up a bit as he strains his facial muscles to not turn so openly disgusted, because again — food. just do it for the food.

anyways, she continues to gush on with the sugary adoration, and despite the content look on his face, the inkling of suspicion grows. there’s no way she’d compliment him like this without ulterior motive. and yep — here it is. “what? sing?!” his brain sputters for a moment as he double triple questions if he heard her correctly. choking a little on his water, he puts down the glass on the table to narrowly avoid a more unfortunate fumble and spill. for a second, he’s at a loss for words (which is impressive given how much kwon taeho usually has to say about anything), and he breaks the hanging silence with an awkwardly forced laugh. “haha… ha. ha. so funny,” he musters with a thin, sweet smile. however his eyes are laser focused at her, sending a clear message: ‘what the fuck?!’ does anyone really think he’s going to break out into a song by a lovesick redhead at the dinner table? with dread, he sneaks a look at the elderly couple next to the them, and fuck… why are they looking at him like that, hands clenched and eyes wide, like he’s their last hope to save all love for the rest of humanity?

he always figured that ‘flip the table’ was merely a colloquial saying that only came to fruition in k-dramas — like come on now, who would actually flip a table in real life? but now taeho thinks he gets it. he’s torn between flipping the whole goddamn table and singing this song. yet he somehow decides the latter was more socially acceptable. “anything for you, babe,” he coos, but there is pain in his eyes. absolutely ridiculous. he can’t remember the last time he was such a pushover for anything — but the scent of truffle oil is strong in the air. he internally screams a long chain of expletives before taking a painful, deep inhale. “i found a love for me…” his lips are smiling but his gaze is murderous. oh what the hell, it’s too late for regrets now; if this is how she wants to play, he’ll agonize them both — all evening long. “darling, just dive right in,” he continues, timing a subtle but pointed kick under the table. and no, this is not him playing footsies; he legitimately wants to kick her ass for this. “and follow my lead…” (another kick emphasizing the my). in the distance, he spots the hostess returning at last with the appetizers. okay, that was enough. abruptly sitting up in his seat, he immediately shuts the fuck up. he swears he’s never been so eager to shut up in his life. “oh look! food is here,” he cuts off curtly. “time to eat.” can’t sing with a mouth stuffed with food…

yeeun laughs. she just guffaws through taeho's entire rendition - she can't help it, not even caring that she's probably completely out of her innocent loving girlfriend character. in her defence, she has never been a good actress. but on the same note, taeho is not a singer and he looks so ridiculously uncomfortable that yeeun just wishes she could record this moment for future purposes (like for whenever taeho pisses her off or whenever he challenges her, she’ll just bring up the video and remind him of the time that he sang ed sheeran in public – maybe she’ll even show danbi a video of it!). never in her wildest dreams would she have thought a short lunch with taeho would end up with them pretending to be a couple and him singing a ballad. she's never seen him so distressed like this, and it bemuses her to no end. especially when he shoots her a slightly murderous look and when he kicks her under the table. god, this day is one for the history books. even though she’s pretty sure taeho will either try to kill her or fuck her over sometime in the future, she doesn’t really like to think about the long-term consequences, choosing to enjoy the present. for what it’s worth, yeeun would even offer to pay the bill because watching taeho like this is honestly priceless.

so, admittedly, she is a little disappointed when food arrives rather quickly, before taeho can even make it to the chorus. but still, it’s a good enough experience and so, she gives him a round of applause, gesturing to the couple to follow her suit. yeeun knows she’s been a little overindulgent in embarrassing taeho, but she just can’t help it – it’s a rare occasion for taeho to be caught so off guard.  “you did so good, babe!" she compliments. the couple agrees and starts making additional comments about staying together, lasting a long time, about how love is about making the right choices every single. yeeun honestly doesn’t really care, but still, she does know the importance of being polite, so she thanks them for their company (and she is genuinely grateful. without them, she wouldn't have been able to experience taeho's rendition of dive) before gesturing to the food, emphasising on how hungry she is, and they finally leave them alone. her amusement only grows by watching taeho eat; he’s shoving in fries as if he’s never seen them for the last month or something. yeeun, on the other hand, leans back on the chair satisfied, before taking a deliberately slow bite of the food in front of her. wow, truffle fries could taste better with an added seasoning of victory.

"you're right," she tells taeho, as she takes her time, unhurried, to take in the appetisers in front of her. "you really are such a good boyfriend! paying for my meals, serenading me, complimenting me," she comments impishly, a devilish smirk growing on her lips. there is nothing that makes yeeun feel better than being a winner. “also,” she notes, “if you wanted to play footsie with me, you just had to ask! no need to kick me under the table like that!”

okay, yeeun knows she’s just being an asshole and rubbing salt into his wounds at this point. it’s been all fun and games, but please, no more questions, no more random conversation with strangers. she has had her entertainment with taeho attempting to sing a cheesy love song in public, so it’s now time to shut up and eat some good food.