Welcome to my Tumblr blog. I post my creative writing and blog posts from my Weebly blog, so hopefully, there's something to capture your interest here.
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Great get online and go to a job board. Indeed, Linkedin whatever. Now you're gonna search for a role that's in your city, fits your qualifications, and doesn't seem like a bad time.
See that easy apply button? Don't hit it they just throw those in the trash. Now you're gonna want to go to the company's website and check their careers page.
Oh? That job doesn't exist anymore. Cool go back to the job board and find another one.
Great you found another job, you're on the company's career page and the job exists!! So you're going to need to make an account on the career page website. They're using Workday, the same site as the last job you applied for? Who cares? You need to make another account for THIS job's workday page.
Now you're going to upload your resume. That'll autopopulate about 15 boxes with everything on your resume, except formatted wrong and with tons of errors. So just go through and painstakingly check the dates on all of that and rewrite everything you already laid out in an aesthetically pleasing format on your resume.
Ok time for the cover letter, explain why this specific job and company are deeply important to you. You love their mission statement and wouldn't even laugh if their ceo was gunned down in the street. You'll really want to reiterate the things you just spent the last 20 minutes filling out on the resume section
(Remember to include language from the job description, people who work in HR are lower than dogs and they need patterns or they get confused.) Write about a page, but hey don't sound too desperate or robotic this is where they judge your character!
Maybe add your portfolio site at the end here, who knows if that helps no one has ever clicked mine haha.
Anywayyy time to hit apply! Congrats! You'll see that confirmation email come in and you should be getting the rejection letter in about 2 weeks. Unfortunately your resume didn't have the right buzzwords and the AI auto rejected you :(
The above is exactly why half of my friends come to me, and cry they're suffering, and I get to bestow my job hunting knowledge on them. I love this shit, it's a game.
For credentials my fastest job hunting time has been 1 week. I searched for 1 week, got an interview, and was hired within a week. My slowest was 1 month, while out of work, while telling ALL my interviewers that I quit my work without notice (I was testing my interviewers to see how shocked they'd get when I'd tell them why, anyone who wasn't shocked I would tell them at the end that I will keep them in mind (not)). My entire average is 2-3 weeks.
Firstly, what you're gunna do is pick a job sector. You're gunna pick a few of these by the end, but for now pick one. Maybe you wanna do bookkeeping, maybe you wanna do something in doggy daycare. Maybe you're a sous chef. Idk! Figure out what abouts you want first. Do not apply to anything yet. You're gunna look at the job description, I've picked out a few for bookkeepers below.
Now what you're gunna do is you're gunna look for "buzz words", or rather words that are gunna appear commonly and indicate the tone for that job. I've highlighted some, but not all in my examples below
Just look at that snout at how similar those descriptions are!
Now that you've got your buzzwords, you're gunna slap those babies into your resume! You see, since your resume is usually read by a computer first, you're gunna trick the computer into giving it to a person. Really what the computer is scanning for is how similar your resume is to the job description. Remember your bullet points, and to keep it short, try to only have 3 to 5 bullet points per job:
- Processed over 500 invoices a day in an efficient and accurate manner
- Curated reports for management review by utilizing available data
- Monitored and recorded over 100 submissions each day increasing accuracy by 50%
These are some great, made up examples I pulled from those buzz words. You might notice I added some numbers into there. That's something you'll wanna try and note for yourself, how much of something you can do, how accurate, how much efficiency you increased, these look GREAT when your resume gets past the computer and is moved in front of a real person.
Now you have your sector-based resume with lots of buzzwords. This is great! Now for the easy part. You're gunna channel your inner "IDGAF" And you're gunna send that to every listing you like on indeed. Filter for "Apply on Indeed" and spam that shit. Sometimes you gotta answer a few extra questions, but if they give me more than 5 quick questions I trash the submission and move on.
Don't waste your time jumping through hoops, streamline it for yourself and use the same methods companies are using. Push MASSIVE amounts of average quality resumes out. The more opportunities taken = the greater the chance of success. For every opportunity taken you've now pitched a chance of success, for every resume you cannot submit because you're piddling around on their stupid website or answering 50 interview questions online, you send out a 0% chance of success.
So go, try this, and see how it works for you.
Some additional things to consider:
- Add random shit in your resume, I added my "Board Game Club" (BDSM group) into my resume for hobbies and discussed how I got my start using sparklines there
- Never underestimate the flair of a little Clipart fleur-de-lis or something on your resume. Never put colored Clipart, but a little floral or swirl design located somewhere nice makes it stand out
- if you don't have a degree that doesn't mean they won't pick you, twice now I've come to a job without a bachelors and being honest that I was only getting an associates before I think of my next steps
- Embellish, do not lie. Jargoning your job description to make it sound cool and professional is GREAT. Do not give me a resume saying you can use CNC machinery when you've only used a 3D printer. Just tell me you know how to program and manage a 3d printer and want to learn CNC machinery.
- Keep. Your. Resume. To. Two. Or. Less. Pages. You don't need EVERY job, only the relevant ones, if your interviewer asks about the gap, tell them what job you had during that time (or if you wanna lie say you were taking college courses and were on a break, you dont need a degree to say you took courses) and that you only wanted to showcase the most relevant ones
- I'm serious on that last one I'll eat your fucking resume
HERE'S HOW TO WRITE A COVER LETTER FROM SOMEONE WHO HAS DONE IT PROFESSIONALY:
Look at the job description.
Identify what they want examples of like "ability to multitask" or "can work across teams to achieve success" or "can work on a budget".
Pick three.
Write this:
IF YOU CAN FIND THE NAME OF A HIRING PERSON: Dear [Name]
IF YOU CAN'T FIND THE NAME OF A HIRING PERSON: Fuck the usual salutation and just roll directly into "I was very excited when I saw this job application. I feel I am a great fit for this role."
Now, look at the three things you chose from their list of what they want. Write a paragraph like this.
I am an adept multitakser who routinely handles several projects/deadlines/needs (whatever). In my current position I [multitask example]. In my previous work, I [second example].
SECOND PARAGRAPH SAME AS THE FIRST DIFFERENT THING THEY WANT BUT NOT ANY WORSE:
In my current position, I work with multiple teams daily, including [name any team you have waved hello to in the hall] and through my work we have [list an accomplishment that required multiple teams].
THIRD PARAGRAPH HERE WE GO AGAIN:
Staying in budget is something I am very familiar with. When I worked on [team], my contributions [list] not only brought the project in on time but under budget by [number]. I have also brought in other projects under budget [examples].
AND NOW THE FINALE:
Thank you for your time in reviewing my cover letter and resume. I look forward to discussing my qualifications and interest in the role with you at length. I can reached at [phone number] and [email].
Sincerely,
[NAME]
And remember, any question that is looking for a negative story ("Tell me about a time you had a conflict with a co-worker") should ALWAYS be presented by you as "I do have a story for that, and I'm pleased with how I handled it." and then you focus on the all the positives in that situation. So, state what the problem was, and then how you fixed it, and then how fixing it improved your working experience. For example:
"Well, I worked with a man named Bob, and he never answered any emails he got after 3:00 PM, so if I had a question after 3, I'd start a draft email and just add to it if i had further questions. And then I'd schedule it to send at the top of his workday. He started earlier than me, and I'd usually come in to a reply from him with the answers I needed when I first sat down for the day. I actually had another co-worker who was having trouble getting Bob to answer questions, and I said, "Oh, are you sending them after 3?" and when she said yes, I shared my own process so it was easier for her to get information, too."
You see how you acknowledge there was an issue but put most of the focus in your answer on the fix? That's the sort of answer they're looking for. The "tell us about something bad at work" questions are about weeding out people who will take any moment to go into a full-on complaint about anything. Any questions that SOUND negative are about wanting to hear your POSTIVIE ability to manage conflict and difficulties.
This is great especially for women in the workplace who have learned kinda self-demeaning patterns of behavior in order to not be seen as a bitch. I started communicating this way in my VERY male dominated field and people definitely started taking me at least slightly more seriously. If that makes sense
Even in my heavily female-dominated industry (and office), using this kind of phrasing sees me taken more seriously by management, HR, and clients. I also find that for things like requesting PTO or schedule flexibility, Iâm more likely to get uncomplicated agreement from the company if I phrase it as a statement of intention rather than a request for permission. This also goes for asking for accommodations; âX is not going to work, I need Y and Zâ is a lot more effective than âI would like Y and Z, if itâs not too much trouble.â
I highly recommend these phrases for any individual. When utilized with good context that avoids adding passive aggressiveness, these phrases convey confidence, assurance, and capability. Those qualities are admirable so people respect you more if they believe you have them, even if youâve made an error because youâre also taking accountability and proceeding without groveling or getting defensive.
If you speak like you know what youâre doing, people are going to give you a good faith take that you are correct. Likewise, if you apologize frequently for yourself for insufficient reasons or act insecure in your desires or proposals, people presume you have reason to be insecure or apologize.
âď¸ Writing Dialogue That Sounds Like Real People, Not Theater Kids on Red Bull
(a crash course in vibes, verbal economy, and making your characters shut up already)
Okay. We need to talk about dialogue. Specifically: why everyone in your draft sounds like theyâre in a high school improv group doing a dramatic reading of Riverdale fanfiction.
Before you panic, this is normal. Early dialogue is almost always too much. Too polished. Too "scripted." So if yours feels off? Youâre not failing. Youâre just doing Draft Zero Dialogue, and itâs time to revise it like a boss.
Hereâs how to fix it.
âââââââ ⌠âââââââ
đ STEP ONE: DETOX THEATER ENERGY
I say this with love: your characters are not all quippy geniuses. They do not need to deliver emotional monologues at every plot beat. They can just say things. Weird, half-finished, awkward things.
Real people:
interrupt each other
trail off mid-thought
dodge questions
contradict themselves
repeat stuff
change the subject randomly
Let your characters sound messy. Not every line needs to sparkle. In fact, the more effort you put into making dialogue â¨perfectâ¨, the more fake it sounds. Cut 30% of your clever lines and see what happens.
âââââââ ⌠âââââââ
đ¤ STEP TWO: GIVE EACH CHARACTER A VERBAL FINGERPRINT
The fastest way to make dialogue feel alive? Make everyone speak differently. Think rhythm, grammar, vocabulary, tone.
Some dials you can twist:
Long-winded vs. clipped
Formal vs. casual
Emojis of speech: sarcasm, filler words, expletives, slang
Sentence structure: do they talk in fragments? Run-ons? Spirals?
Emotion control: are they blunt, diplomatic, avoidant, performative?
Hereâs a shortcut: imagine what your character sounds like over text. Are they the âlol okayâ type or the âokie dokie artichokie đâ¨â one? Now translate that into speech.
âââââââ ⌠âââââââ
đ§ STEP THREE: FUNCTION > FILLER
Every line of dialogue should do something. Reveal something. Move something. Change something.
Ask:
Does this line push the plot forward?
Does it show character motivation/conflict/dynamic?
Does it create tension, add context, or raise a question?
If itâs just noise? Itâs dead air. Cut it. Replace it with a glance. A gesture. A silence that says more.
TIP: look at a dialogue scene and remove every third line. Does the scene still work? Probably better.
âââââââ ⌠âââââââ
đĽ STEP FOUR: REACTIVITY IS THE GOLD STANDARD
Characters donât talk into a void. They respond. And how they respond = the real juice.
Donât just write back-and-forth ping pong. Write conflict, dodge, misunderstanding. If one character says something vulnerable, the other might joke. Or ignore it. Or say something cruel. Thatâs tension.
Dialogue is not just information exchange. Itâs emotional strategy.
Try this exercise:
A says something revealing.
B lies.
A notices, but pretends they donât.
B changes the subject.
Now youâve got a real scene.
âââââââ ⌠âââââââ
đ STEP FIVE: PAY ATTENTION TO POWER
Every convo has a power dynamic, even if itâs tiny. Whoâs steering? Whoâs withholding? Whoâs deflecting, chasing, challenging?
Power can shift line to line. That shift = tension. And tension = narrative fuel.
Write conversations like chess matches, not ping pong.
âââââââ ⌠âââââââ
âď¸ STEP SIX: SCISSORS ARE YOUR BEST FRIEND
The best dialogue is often the second draft. Or third. Or fourth. First drafts are just you figuring out what everyone wants to say. Later drafts figure out what they actually would say.
Things to cut:
Greetings/closings ("Hi!" "Bye!"--skip it unless it serves tone)
Exposition disguised as chat
Obvious thoughts spoken aloud
Explaining jokes
Repeating what we already know
Readers are smart. Let them fill in blanks.
âââââââ ⌠âââââââ
đ§ STEP SEVEN: READ IT OUT LOUD (YES, REALLY)
If you hate this step: too bad. It works. Read it. Mumbling is fine. Cringe is part of the ritual.
Ask yourself:
Would someone actually say this?
Does this sound like one person speaking, or a puppet show with one hand?
Where does the rhythm trip? Whereâs the breath?
If you canât say it out loud without wincing, the reader wonât make it either. Respect the vibe.
âââââââ ⌠âââââââ
đ TL;DR:
If you want your dialogue to sound like real people, let your characters be real. Messy. Annoying. Human. Let them interrupt and lie and joke badly and say the wrong thing at the worst time.
Cut the improv class energy. Kill the urge to be â¨brilliantâ¨. And listen to how people talk when theyâre scared, tired, pissed off, in love, or trying not to say what they mean.
Thatâs where the good stuff is.
ârin t.
// thewriteadviceforwriters
// official advocate of awkward silences and one-word replies
P.S. I made a free mini eBook about the 5 biggest mistakes writers make in the first 10 pages đ you can grab it here for FREE:
⌠A free (and actually helpful) guide to leveling up your first 10 pages âŚIf you're unsure whether your opening is â¨doing enough⨠to hook re
Fife Council are buying every P6-S6 (~9-17 age for non Scots) student their own iPad. This is projected to cost over ÂŁ50 million, without clear benefits. Meanwhile, schools are chronically understaffed, and entire subjects are being cut due to the sheer lack of people to teach them.
Yeah thatâs dumb, ipads and chromebooks donât teach computer literacy.
As someone who saw the first wave of Chromebooks being rolled out (who âvolunteeredâ (unpaid labour) as a technician type person), Chromebooks arenât the win councils think they are.
Giving students Chromebooks means theyâre reliant on whether or not the thingâs charged (teachers donât usually let kids charge them during class because wires = tripping hazard, and itâs another way to mean and condescending âitâs a privilege, itâs a responsibility, if you arenât prepared to learn then youâre ungrateful and evilâ). This obviously puts a strain on people who come from low income families (moreso nowadays with the price of electricity), and people who suffer from things like ADHD and have trouble keeping track of things like that.
No more paper notes means that once theyâre out of school and their school login is deleted, theyâre never seeing any of it again, unless theyâve meticulously backed it up. Retaining information with typed notes is also really, really hard for a lot of people. Not to mention that everyoneâs complaining about that kids screen time⌠basing most of their education around laptops and iPads leads to increased screen time, possibly eye problems.
And, the cherry on top, is that it makes skyving so much easier. I spent most of sixth year playing Club Penguin Reloaded, Skribble, variants of agario⌠More tech savvy people could take on the big task of downloading an unfiltered browser (which took about three clicks), which meant I could add Discord to my assortment of time wasting websites.
Plus they break. Not a lot, but in a building where an army of under 18s have these devices, thereâs always something wrong somewhere. One time a kid came into the technician room with a smashed up Chromebook. âMy gran picked it up,â he said. His gran must have been the Incredible Hulk because that thing was BUSTED.
So yeah. Pencil, paper, supervised computer room. Occamâs Razor, guys, literally just ask one twelve year old and they can figure all of this out.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
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Let's be honest, fantasy authors love their kingdoms and empires. You can throw a rock in a bookshop or a library in the fantasy section and you will 99.99999% hit a fantasy book that will be set in or mention either of those structures. But what are they really? What's the difference between them all? Are there any more examples of structures that would suit your WIP better? Are you using the right terms? Let's have a closer look.
Duchy
A Duchy is a small territory ruled by a Duke/Duchess. While Duchies can be found in kingdoms, some duchies were sovereign states in their own right. Duchies are usually small by land mass but some duchies such as Burgundy were extremely powerful and influential. Independent Duchies were usually apart of a kingdom but grew so powerful that they eventually broke away to become a sovereign state in their own right. An example would be modern day Luxembourg, historic Milan and Burgundy.
Principality
A principality is territory ruled by a Prince/Princess. A principality is typically smaller than a kingdom and in some instances, can be apart of a larger kingdom or be a sovereign state. Principalities have a history of having broken away from a larger kingdom or eventually becoming apart of a kingdom. A principality within a kingdom is ruled by a Prince/Princess, usually an heir of the monarch and can be used to train them up to assume the throne in the future. Examples include Monaco, Liechtenstein and Andorra.
Kingdom
A sovereign state/country that is ruled by ruling King or a Queen. A kingdom is much larger and more powerful than a principality. Kingdoms can be feudal, meaning they are ruled in a strict hierarchy or an autocracy where the monarch rules alone with minimal input from the government or constitutional where the monarch is more of a figurehead and the government has a good chunk of control. Examples include England, Thailand and modern day Spain.
Commonwealth
A Commonwealth isn't a popular choice in fantasy but it is an interesting structure. A Commonwealth in its most basic form is a collection of states that are linked by either a shared culture or history. A Commonwealth can be a politically power or an economic power, with every state allowed to participate as much as they like. Not one state leads the others, it is all one group of equals. A Commonwealth can be a good idea for a group of nations that are more powerful together with them keeping their own independence.
Federation
A Federation is a political structure that is made up of united states or countries that are under a single government but each state is still independent and rules itself. Each state can have different laws, different cultures and economies but they all answer to the single government. Examples include the United States of America.
Republic
A Republic is a territory that is ruled by leaders and heads of state that have been elected on merit and by choice of the people. Republics are not just countries but can also be much smaller areas such as cities. Republics are democratic in nature, with the people having a say in who leads them in accordance to a constitution. There are many kinds of Republic: presidential, parliamentary, federal, theocratic, unitary. Examples of Republics include the Republic of Ireland and the city of Florence.
Protectorate
A Protectorate is a country/region/territory that is independent but relies on a larger, more powerful state for protection either in a military or diplomatic sense. A Protectorate was often used by Empires in order to maintain control over an area without annexing it. There are many reasons a larger state and the protectorate would agree to this, mainly the protectorate is much smaller meaning it is far more vulnerable to attack or it has very little power when compared to other states. A Protectorate allows the territory some power to rule itself but the larger state may feel the need or desire to interfere in the dealings of the territory. Examples of protectorates include the client kingdoms of the Roman Empire like Egypt before its annexation and Puerto Rico.
Empire
An Empire is a collection of nations that are united under one sovereign head of state or government. An Empire is formed by one nation steadily taking control of other nations, either through straight invasion and colonization or acquiring them through marriage and other less violent ways. An Empire is powerful mainly because it can drum up more resources, more influence and more military power. An Empire might impose the traditions, beliefs and culture of its principal nation - the nation that started it all - onto its colonies for better control and feeling of uniformity. Empires never last, that is something to always remember. Empires will eventually fragment due to the vast size and sometimes revolt among the conquered states. Examples of empires include the Roman Empire, the Byzantine Empire, the Ottoman Empire.
Marriage is an important part of the life of both royal and nobles in any setting, either historical fiction or fantasy. Marriages are not only life long commitments but they are business and protection deals by families. These are strategies, not relationships. So how can we write them?
Why make a Marriage?
Marriage is at its heart, the seal on an agreement. Two families may come to an agreement to share resources, connections and support one another. For a noble family, it could be about elevation. For example, if the daughter of an Earl marries a Duke, her siblings can now make higher marriages and her family would be more important thanks to this link. It could even be about money. In the late Victorian - Early Edwardian period, many impoverished English peers married wealthy American women for their fortunes. In exchange, the women became titled aristocrats. Royal marriages are made for more universal perks. A royal marriage can change the political layout of the world, it could isolate a kingdom or be the starting gun or a war or end a years long conflict. For example, Kingdom A might be being threatened by Kingdom B. Kingdom C has a powerful military. Kingdom A might offer up a marriage deal to Kingdom C, with the caveat that C protect A from B. C would obligated to act if A gets attacked by B, since A is now an ally. A marriage cements the deal as it creates family ties, which is seen as a sort of permanent stamp on negotiations. After all, would you screw over family?
Marriages of Choice vs Arranged Marriages
Marriages can either be made on behalf of a royal/noble or made by themselves. An heir might be more restricted in this case whilst a younger children have a little more leeway especially if they are part of a large family.
Marriages are not always arranged. But that doesn't mean there aren't restrictions. Any royal or noble will have a list of certain attributes their spouse must have or certain attributes they cannot have. Marriages of choice have to be approved by parents (and the crown if you are a high ranking noble) and if you are royal, sometimes by the government itself.
Arranged marriages are agreements between two families. They might want each other's protection, support or they might simply want to do business together such as opening trade corridors or lifting embargoes on certain items. Arranged marriages are usually made on behalf of both spouses and they are expected to agree to the match for the sake of their family or country.
Screwing over the Deal
Making a marriage doesn't mean that the deal will last forever. Alliances change and circumstances shift. Whilst everyone may be all friendly during negotiations and for some time after, politics is the aim of the game. Treaties can be broken, war can break out and marriages can become unpopular choices. If a country has welcomed a bride/groom one day and then their country becomes the enemy, the bride/groom could become an enemy as well and face isolation and disrespect from the public - even their new family. However they are expected to be loyal to their new family and country, even over their own family and kingdom. These marriages have no promise of happiness. They are a job, a duty to ensure the family is taken care of and securing their futures.
Timeline of a Royal Marriage between Two Royal Families
Offer: The suggestion is made.
Negotiations: The discussion through ambassadors of what a marriage might entails, what each side is willing to provide or what they demand of the marriage. This can take weeks, months even years before a marriage is agreed.
Betrothal: Marriage is approved, treaty signed and the couple is engaged. Betrothals can last from anything from a few weeks to years
Wedding: If one spouse has to travel to their new home, they will travel to their new home and meet their new court, new family and their spouse. Once they arrive, the wedding will take place in a matter of days.
Married Life
These marriages are public, so it is expected for the couple to at least act civil. If they do not like one another or can't stand the sight of another or they just don't love each other, is irrelevant to society and their expectations. They are expected to attend certain events together, sire children and do their duty. There's no rules saying they must live together, so many lived separate lives. The higher ranking spouse is expected to provide their spouse with an allowance and a staff. For international marriages, spouses are not permitted to hire a large party of their own attendants even if they accompany them to their new country. They may keep one or two for company but a newly minted royal should not be waited on by foreign servants, they are a royal of their new kingdom now.
What makes a "good" marriage?
As mentioned above, marriages and relationships are expected to fall into certain perameters. Any spouse - chosen or assigned - should meet certain standards such as be of appropriate rank, follow societal norms and even sometimes be of the same religion. Marriages to anybody who falls out of these standards can be seen as a devasting move - the marriage of Edward IV is still remarked on as a contributing factor to the end of the Plantagenet dynasty. Making the wrong choice of spouse in society's eyes can lead to gossip, being shunned, being disrespected and even barred from succeeding to your birthright. Unequal marriages or morganatic marriages, can even bar children from succession, disallow the couple from attending events together and deny the spouse the style they ought to be entitled to - the marriage of Archduke Franz Ferdinand is a good example to study. A good marriage is seen as one that adheres to all the expectations of society - even if it is an unhappy one.
Enemies to "I accidentally came across you while you were vulnerable and scared and I'm not a total asshole so I tried to help you" to "accidental mutual uncovering of softer sides and vulnerabilities" to "I can't be mean to you anymore, not out of pity but because it would feel weird betraying that brief truce we had" to "Fine I'll make an effort to be nice to you now I guess" to "actually now that we're not actively hating each other you're not so bad I guess" to "i think we're friends but I'm not going to say that because I'm afraid you're not gonna feel the same way" to "oh you also think we're friends? Great" to lovers
Ngl every time someone adds a comment or tag that says "remove the to lovers part and this is perfect" I'm like. Yeah you're right. Weakest part of the post honestly. Consider it removed.
Another worldbuilding application of the "two layer rule": To create a culture while avoiding The Planet Of Hats (the thing where a people only have one thing going for them, like "everyone wears a silly hat"): You only need two hats.
Try picking two random flat culture ideas and combine them, see how they interact. Let's say taking the Proud Warrior Race - people who are all about glory in battle and feats of strength, whose songs and ballads are about heroes in battle and whose education consists of combat and military tactics. Throw in another element: Living in diaspora. Suddenly you've got a whole more interesting dynamic going on - how did a people like this end up cast out of their old native land? How do they feel about it? How do they make a living now - as guards, mercenaries? How do their non-combatants live? Were they always warrior people, or did they become fighters out of necessity to fend for themselves in the lands of strangers? How do the peoples of these lands regard them?
Like I'm not shitting, it's literally that easy. You can avoid writing an one-dimensional culture just by adding another equally flat element, and the third dimension appears on its own just like that. And while one of the features can be location/climate, you can also combine two of those with each other.
Let's take a pretty standard Fantasy Race Biome: The forest people. Their job is the forest. They live there, hunt there, forage there, they have an obnoxious amount of sayings that somehow refer to trees, woods, or forests. Very high chance of being elves. And then a second common stock Fantasy Biome People: The Grim Cold North. Everything is bleak and grim up there. People are hardy and harsh, "frostbite because the climate hates you" and "being stabbed because your neighbour hates you" are the most common causes of death. People are either completely humourless or have a horrifyingly dark, morbid sense of humour. They might find it funny that you genuinely can't tell which one.
Now combine them: Grim Cold Bleak Forest People. The summer lasts about 15 minutes and these people know every single type of berry, mushroom and herb that's edible in any fathomable way. You're not sure if they're joking about occasionally resorting to eating tree bark to survive the long dark winter. Not a warrior people, but very skilled in disappearing into the forest and picking off would-be invaders one by one. Once they fuck off into the woods you won't find them unless they want to be found.
Unhealed Wounds Your Character Pretends Are Just âPersonality Traitsâ
These are the things your character claims are just âhow they areâ but really, theyâre bleeding all over everyone and calling it a vibe.
â°Â They say they're "independent."
Translation:Â They donât trust anyone to stay.
They learned early that needing people = disappointment. So now they call it âbeing self-sufficientâ like itâs some shiny badge of honor. (Mostly to cover up how lonely they are.)
â°Â They say they're "laid-back."
Translation:Â They stopped believing their wants mattered.
They'll eat anywhere. Do anything. Agree with everyone. Not because they're chill, but because the fight got beaten out of them a long time ago.
â°Â They say they're "a perfectionist."
Translation:Â They believe mistakes make them unlovable.
Every typo. Every bad hair day. Every misstep feels like proof that theyâre worthless. So they polish and polish and polish... until thereâs nothing real left.
â°Â They say they're "private."
Translation:Â Theyâre terrified of being judgedâor worse, pitied.
Walls on walls on walls. They joke about being âmysteriousâ while desperately hoping no one gets close enough to see the mess behind the curtain.
â° They say they're "ambitious."
Translation:Â They think achieving enough will finally make the emptiness go away.
If they can just get the promotion, the award, the validationâthen maybe theyâll finally outrun the feeling that theyâre fundamentally broken. (It never works.)
â°Â They say they're "good at moving on."
Translation:Â Theyâre world-class at repression.
Theyâll cut people out. Bury heartbreak. Pretend it never happened. And then wonder why they wake up at 3 a.m. feeling like they're suffocating.
â°Â They say they're "logical."
Translation:Â Theyâre terrified of their own feelings.
Emotions? Messy. Dangerous. Uncontrollable. So they intellectualize everything to avoid feeling anything real. They call it rationality. (It's fear.)
â°Â They say they're "loyal to a fault."
Translation:Â They mistake abandonment for loyalty.
They stay too long. Forgive too much. Invest in people who treat them like an afterthought, because they think walking away makes them "just as bad."
â°Â They say they're "resilient."
Translation:Â They don't know how to ask for help without feeling like a burden.
They wear every bruise like a trophy. They survive things they should never have had to survive. And they call it strength. (But really? It's exhaustion wearing a cape.)
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Did anybody else notice the homoerotic vibe of Steve and Gareth's relationship?
Today I went to see the much anticipated Minecraft Movie. I recorded my thoughts in a blog post because, fun fact, I am currently embroiled in a university task in which I need to maintain a blog (if you would like to add to my eventual PowerPoint, give it a read and engage with this post! Liking, sharing, commenting your own thoughts... as a child I yearned for the mines data).
Excerpt:
Read the full review here: https://seekingdandelions.weebly.com/home/a-spoiler-free-minecraft-movie-review
I'm sorry I'm going fucking insane over trans people in sports issues the anti trans crowd has lost the fucking plot and then has the audacity to act like its the trannies who are ridiculous
I used to be of the "well the sports issue isn't really important to me its w/e I just don't want it to be a gateway into other transphobia" but oh my fucking god we are so far gone. The fencing shit is sending me over the edge. What the fuck.
I'm also still so fucking pissed that we have to include "ooo the trans fencer only finished in X place" because its a reminder that trans women will never be allowed to excel at anything in the public eye without being cut down. Fuck OFF
i hope you donât mind me adding to this post op but iâve got a sorta personal connection to this story. for ppl who do not know this about me, ive been fencing for like five years and am trans. i also used to fence in the same circles as this woman
this womanâstephanie turner is her name, because i think people should know it so this shit can ruin her lifeâregularly fences cis men and wins because fencing is fucking co-ed
i know that is in the screenshots already, but what i can add which isnât in the screenshot is that i personally know and have fenced some of the people listed in that âcompetition historyâ screenshot, including some of the cis men which she beat. i know from fencing them myself that these guys are good, smart, capable fencers
that said, even if i didnât know them, i could tell you a lot of these guys are solid. do you see that column labeled âratingâ? being rated means theyâve placed very well or won medals at prestigious or decently sized tournamentsâE is the lowest rating (but still difficult to get) and ratings go up to A (and U means unrated). if you look, you can see she beat a few rated fencers in that screenshot, some of them male!
another thing i know about stephanie turner is that she fences at a club my friendâs brother works at. she regularly beats said brother, who is 6â4 and 200lbs. iâve never met this brother, but if heâs anything like my friend, heâs a damn good fencer with years of experience. stephanie turner is GOOD. per my friend, she probably would have won the bout she took a knee on. she really did not need to pull shit transphobic shit and i guarantee she knows it.
all this shit about fencing cis men really does not matter, to be clear. being a woman beating men doesnât make stephanie a good fencerâit doesnât even make her a notable fencer. every afab fencer who is good enough to beat other fencers beats amab fencers. the first fencer i beat as an afab person was a cis man who started the sport at the same time as me just bc we were at the same general level. because again, fencing is co-ed. i just am explaining all this to show how damn stupid dying on this hill is (and the fact she for sure knows how damn pointless and hateful it is)
because fencing is NOT a strength sport! being stronger or taller than your opponent, like how a cis man would stereotypically be vs a cis woman, isnât necessarily an advantageâstrength can absolutely fuck you up if you donât know how to manage it, and if you know how to use it, being shorter than your opponents can actually be an advantage
if anything, fencing a stamina sport, which something you can very much train no matter your gender if you put in the work. more than anything to do with strength or speed, though, fencing is a strategy sport. there is really no reason to gender segregate it. a lot of tournaments do, but plenty tournaments DONâT, and most clubs you go to for practice and drills and learning fencing will be co-ed and have you constantly fencing against âopposite sexâ fencers
(half relatedâone of the best foils on my fencing team is a trans woman who sometimes fences in the menâs brackets in tournaments and regularly beats cis men)
if stephanie turner is a good fencerâwhich she definitely isâshe knows all of this. that fencing is more about stamina, that strength and height mean nothing, that the only thing that really matters is your strategy.
stephanie turner was literally just doing this to be an asshole. the fact sheâs getting money for it is fucking disgusting. i hope she faces some damn consequences for this shit, because itâs such stupid, hateful bullshit, especially for a sport where that âbiological advantageâ shit really and truly does not matter
i do want to end this addition on a nice note tho, so i want to add: a few days after this story brokeâthis weekend, actuallyâi attended a two day tournament as a spectator. while it wasnât everywhere, i definitely saw a lot of refs and staff wearing trans pride/support pins, as well as a few people in attendance wearing trans supportive shirts and accessories. all of the people ive spoken to in the fencing world about thisâwhich is quite a lotâhave thought it both appalling and monumentally stupid, and im hoping that will lead to consequences for stephanie turner and anyone else who tries to follow in her bullshit idiot footsteps
I remember being told that a local bowls club (lawn bowling, not cereal enthusiasts) put something to the tune of âyour gender must match your birth certificateâ on the back of one of the little cards (a score card or entry card or smth) they got at a competitionâŚ
Lawn bowling is literally just rolling a thing down some grass, the idea that being transgender gives you an advantage is so wild (of course, itâs not some mysterious trans-advantage they feared, itâs built on both sexism and the desire to exclude trans people from the sport).
A lot of the time, by saying that trans women shouldnât compete with cis women, I feel like itâs not that they think trans women are super soldiers⌠they just think cis women are wholly incapable of ever excelling in sport the way that men do (and, again, a desire to exclude trans-women from sport).
The idea of some guy at a bowling club thinking âI must protect my precious rolling thing down grass from the evil transgender people, who are determined to take over my precious rolling thing down grassâ is just pathetic and sad, if people were capable of thinking at least one critical thought, they might lead happier lives.
Tears are powerful, but do you know what's more impactful? The struggle to hold them back. This post is for all your hard-hearted stoic characters who'd never shed a tear before another, and aims to help you make them breakdown realistically.
The Physical Signs of Holding Back Tears
Heavy Eyelids, Heavy Heart
Your character's eyelids feel weighted, as if the tears themselves are dragging them down. Their vision blursânot quite enough to spill over, but enough to remind them of the dam threatening to break.
The Involuntary Sniffle
They sniffle, not because their nose is running, but because their body is desperately trying to regulate itself, to suppress the wave of emotion threatening to take over.
Burning Eyes
Their eyes sting from the effort of restraint, from the battle between pride and vulnerability. If they try too hard to hold back, the whites of their eyes start turning red, a telltale sign of the tears they've refused to let go.
The Trembling Lips
Like a child struggling not to cry, their lips quiver. The shame of it fuels their determination to stay composed, leading them to clench their fists, grip their sleeves, or dig their nails into the nearest surfaceâanything to regain control.
The Fear of Blinking
Closing their eyes means surrender. The second their lashes meet, the memories, the pain, the heartbreak will surge forward, and the tears will follow. So they force themselves to keep staringâat the floor, at a blank wall, at anything that wonât remind them of why theyâre breaking.
The Coping Mechanisms: Pretending Itâs Fine
A Steady Gaze & A Deep Breath
To mask the turmoil, they focus on a neutral object, inhale slowly, and steel themselves. If they can get through this one breath, they can get through the next.
Turning Away to Swipe at Their Eyes
When they do need to wipe their eyes, they do it quickly, casually, as if brushing off a speck of dust rather than wiping away the proof of their emotions.
Masking the Pain with a Different Emotion
Anger, sarcasm, even laughterâany strong emotion can serve as a shield. A snappy response, a bitter chuckle, a sharp inhaleâeach is a carefully chosen defence against vulnerability.
Why This Matters
Letting your character fight their tears instead of immediately breaking down makes the scene hit harder. It shows their internal struggle, their resistance, and their need to stay composed even when theyâre crumbling.
This is written based off of personal experience as someone who goes through this cycle a lot (emotional vulnerability who?) and some inspo from other books/articles
Do you have any tips on writing a character that can be a bit quiet and weird/quirky yet confrontational and loud. She bites and picks her fingers when very anxious but sheâs also a confident, and brave character who fights for whatâs right and what she wants. I have a difficulty mixing a characterâs personality sometimes, and wondered if you had any tips to help? :)
On Creating Beautifully Contradictory Characters â¨
Hey writer friend! Rin here.
I LIVE for these questions! đ
Here's the thing about characters (and people). we're not single-note beings who fit into neat little boxes. The most real characters exist in the in-between spaces.
Let's talk about how to make this work...
The secret to contradictory character traits
What makes a character feel REAL isn't consistency. it's coherence.
⢠Your character doesn't need to be the same in every situation
⢠What they need is an emotional core that makes sense of their seemingly opposing behaviors
⢠Think of their personality as a constellation, not a straight line
When I'm developing characters like this, I always start with their wounds and values. What do they care about SO DEEPLY that it would make a normally quiet person raise their voice? What hurts have they experienced that make them bite their fingers when anxious?
Some practical ways to blend these traits
⢠Give her specific triggers for each mode. Maybe she's quiet in casual social settings but finds her voice when someone's being mistreated.
⢠Create physical transitions between states. How does her body language shift when moving from quiet observer to vocal defender? Does she take a deep breath? Square her shoulders?
⢠The finger-biting anxiety habit is actually perfect. it can be the bridge between her quiet and loud states. Maybe it's what she does while gathering courage before speaking up.
⢠Show us moments where BOTH traits are present at once. She can be nervously biting her fingers WHILE confronting someone.
What NOT to do (because it's boring)
Please don't fall into these traps:
⢠Don't make her "usually quiet except when..." That's not a complex character, that's just situational behavior.
⢠Don't explain away her contradictions with trauma (unless that's genuinely part of her story). Not every character trait needs a tragic backstory!
⢠Don't make her self-conscious about her contradictions. She doesn't need to apologize for being both quiet and loud.
Let's make some word magic happen
Try writing a scene where:
We first see her in her quiet, observing mode
Something happens that triggers her sense of justice
We witness her internal thought process as she decides to speak up
She exhibits her anxious behavior (finger biting) while ALSO stepping into her confrontational mode
Afterward, she returns to quietness, but it feels different now
The magic happens in those transition moments. That's where readers will fall in love with her complexity.
Remember this always
The most memorable characters aren't the ones who are consistently anything. They're the ones who surprise us while still feeling true to themselves.
Your character's contradictions aren't flaws to fix or explain away. they're what make her human. They're what make readers say "I KNOW her" even if they've never met anyone exactly like her.
So embrace those contradictions. Let her be quiet AND loud. Let her be anxious AND brave. Let her be fully, messily human.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Watched a 3 hour plot summary of the Dream SMP just to see what all those teenagers in 2020 were on about and I've come away from it with the conclusion that, corollary to my joke that The Locked Tomb is "Homestuck if it was good", the Dream SMP is Homestuck if it was bad
Okay, so, apologies for the mini-essay, but seeing this on my dash opened a forbidden door in my brain:
I was really into Dream SMP while it was ongoing, which meant that I got to witness the absurdity of it all, and its inevitable downfall, in real-time. It went from feeling like friends messing around and playing with a narrative, to mostly consisting of a palpable, deeply existential fear of losing their rapidly growing audience.
The Dream SMP could only ever be as successful as it was during a pandemic, evidenced by the fact that it all fell apart as the world started to open up again.
Some members were talented storytellers, but most⌠were not as gifted, to put it nicely. But everyone wanted a slice of the pie, which meant confusing, sometimes contradictory, plots where everyone wanted to be the main character, growing animosity between the less celebrated members and the successful ones, and monologuing.
Good lord, the monologuing.
As the individual stories people were trying to tell drew them further away from others, activity on the server dwindled, meaning that if somebody wanted to kickstart a story, they had to go it solo... Which often manifested as at least half an hour of monologuing that was mostly repetition, a sad/concerned tone, and aimless wandering around.
'I'm sad because of this, but I shouldn't be sad because of that, and if they knew I was sad it would make them sad, so I shouldn't be sad, but I am sad', type stuff. And when that was over, the person's chat would be like 'Wow, go off king, Oscar when?', and then the rest of the six-hour VOD would be mining, it was WILD.
I think the point where I realised that the Dream SMP had gotten irreparably bad was when they did an armageddon, doomsday event. The hub point of the world got absolutely nuked, which led to everyone crawling to separate corners of the Minecraft server which... isn't ideal for improv, as you might imagine.
But the absolute worst part of that event was that at least three different people decided to have a "villain arc" independently, at the exact same time (because the villains got the fanart and the animatics), and most of the others just stood around and watched silently. So, when the place that is supposed to symbolise community is under threat, half of the people that would usually fight to protect it were like 'Lol, no, I'm feeling a little evil today >:3' and started burning the place down. In some stories that could be a compelling turning point, but it just did not work at all, and it really spotlighted the variance in storytelling skills between participants. There was no build-up to the betrayals, it made no sense, and DSMP members were realising that caving to the will of the viewers was profitable (pandering to what your audience of mostly young teenagers wants to see is a bad idea, for obvious reasons).
There was a lot of audience homework copying inspiration, actually. Viewers would post that characters need therapy, so someone starts trying to do in-character therapy. Viewers would theorise about a villain arc for someone, which would then happen with zero development. Viewers would say, 'Hey, it would be neat if this guy was a time traveller' - enter stage left, that guy's time travel-based side series.
Throw in the constant drama, the ever-looming misogyny both on the server and in the community (source: just look at the gender ratio and the general treatment of Nihachu), and the fact that some of the acting was... rough.
At the time, it was all a lot of fun. Regardless of how it turned out, the enjoyment I personally got from the Dream SMP was very real, and I'm glad that I had it to get me through a rough time, but as a case study it's endlessly fascinating how something could be so fundamentally doomed to crash and burn. I don't think I could sit through and enjoy an entire Dream SMP vod again (unless it was a Technoblade vod, but even then it would be bittersweet for... obvious reasons).
I never actually watched the final stream that they did on the server. I don't know how people who're still active fans do it.
So yeah, Homestuck but bad doesn't sound too innacurate.
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