ehehehe ;

我那么爱你

Last week, I let go of someone whom I loved very much. If you ask me why, the short answer is: personality differences and mindset incompatibilities. Yet, this is so brief and doesn’t tell much. In that relationship, I learnt that compatibility is so much more than chemistry and sometimes, compromises and sacrifices aren’t enough to overcome the gaps in differences. It feels so overbearing to love someone but when it comes to compassion, empathy, and understanding, it seems to only be one sided. It’s not like the other party wasn’t kind. But in most moments of the relationship, it felt like we were listening to the same song yet understanding the lyrics in very different ways. You would think - there can be fun in the different ways we perceived things. However, as time passes, you realised the song will come to an end, and it’s the real life now. And when you tell them about your day, they don’t know what you mean. Of course, they want to be there for you and you feel good that they want to be there for you. But there’s a little tug in your heart that says something is wrong. Then you realised “I love yous” don’t always mean the same for everyone. I love you because I adore you vs. I love you because I am in awe of you and how you make me feel. Are they different? I think so. But I can’t really put in words how different they are. Love for love or love for what you can give me.

I can’t help but think: (Please move on from this post if you do not want spoilers from KinnPorsche episode 8-9)

“I LIKE IT WHEN YOU ARE HAPPY” - KINN THEERAPANYAKUL, 2022