bill cipher public enemy no.1

I don't believe this person is still in the fandom so for the sake of not @-ing a blog primarily for a post made in 2016, this person will remain anonymous, but: someone actually calculated the danger quotient of each respective member of the Pines family by dividing the number of episodes in which they required rescue by the total number of episodes they appeared in (defined as a speaking role). Only two characters received the distinction of needing to be rescued in episodes they did not appear in (due to one or more characters working towards the end goal of rescuing them or a character in a sufficiently dangerous situation that even though no one is actively working towards their direct rescue, not counting the episode would be insane): Mabel, whose danger quotient wound up being ~17%, and Ford who, due to multiple "in danger but no speaking role" episodes during which either Stanley worked on the portal on screen or Ford was directly in Bill's clutches like during Weirdmageddon, has some bullshit happening to him approximately 142% of the time.