There was never any need to celebrate your birthday growing up. It never struck you as odd, how could it? No one around you cared to throw parties or receive gifts, only the quick and casual "happy birthday" before they all moved on with their days. A birthday was just another day, no different the those who came before it.
And yet, when you joined the Shepherds, the atmosphere was different in many ways. People did not speak to one another with a chill in their tone (for the most part), treating one another with kindness without expecting anything in return.
For awhile you couldn't help but be suspicious of the whole ordeal-- especially when that kindness was forced upon you. There was no better example than when Robin invited you to the barracks only for the giddiness to immediately leave your body when nearly everyone jumped out from their hiding places, wishing you a happy birthday.
They're lucky you had some self restraint. They could have very well ended up with craters for heads.
It didn't stop at your own birthday either. Robin would often come up and ask for help setting up, or if you wanted to join in on the festivities. Oh, how badly you wanted to say no, that birthdays were meaningless, but you couldn't. Not when it was Robin who asked so sweetly. But oh, you hated every minute of it. The appeal of cakes, gifts and singing never grew on you, though you kept it to yourself after some time.
Once the children appeared from their world your perception shifts once more. Your own daughter is nothing more than a babe swaddled in her blanket still leeching off your teat for her own survival, and yet the grown woman who stands in front of you claims to be your Noire. Years have passed right before your eyes, and you had no time to prepare.
It fully clicks when you see the other mother's celebrate the lives of their children, both young and old. The smiles on their faces (well, some of them, anyway...) are like knives to your heart, a feeling you experience so rarely that when you do it is torturous.
When you approach your husband with the idea to throw Noire a birthday party he truly believes you have lost whatever mind you had left from the years of dark studies. At most you had exchanged gifts to one another-- something you tolerated because it made him happy-- so the idea that you wanted to throw a party left him pinching himself awake.
The party itself was nothing spectacular. It was simple, small-- meant for only the four of you. All of Ylisse didn't need to know that you suddenly changed your tune. But the smile on your daughter's face, the way her shaking voice steadied once she realized there was no trick up your sleeve, nor some sort of hex at play.
For once in your life you understand the importance of a birthday. You still had no need for the material possessions, and sweets and singing both equally gave you a headache...but perhaps there was some merit to seeing the way your loved one's smile lit up the darkest of hearts.
Your daughter waddles about all on her own now. She's hardly as much of a leech as you had once claimed. Perhaps motherhood has softened you, or perhaps it was the fear of the mother you could become. It's quiet, though you have classes to be attending soon. For a moment you almost mourn how little you appreciated that party in the barracks back with the Shepherds.
At the very least you would have your family to wish you a happy birthday this year. That much would be more than enough.
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