SCosnick

Man, I’m probably not the right person to answer this because I am terrible at meta. But I just read through that part of Fish & Chips, and you are so right…

We don’t really get to see much of Ty’s internal struggle at that point, but there is one moment that stood out to me. It’s when Zane first hears the news, and says:

“He hired Del to spy on Corbin—on his own husband? And Del agreed to it? Jesus.”

I’m sure seeing Zane’s anger jolts Ty and makes him even more worried about how Zane would react if/when his own truth came out. And I feel like Ty is quick to point out (more for himself than Zane) the difference between what he is doing and what he thought Del was doing:

“Del is a merc, Zane. He’s not married to Corbin because he loves him. He married him because he was hired to seduce him.”

We know that Ty really was doing what he was BECAUSE he loves Zane and wants to remain with him, so he is trying soothe his guilt by justifying his own actions in comparison to Del’s. Of course it turns out in the end that Del and Ty weren’t really that different at all:

“He had to have known he risked losing Corbin either way. He sacrificed himself.” Ty paused, letting that sink in. What he left unspoken was clear. Del had sacrificed his freedom and his heart just to keep the man he loved safe.

The big difference for Ty in comparing himself to Del is that Ty fell for Zane before he got his assignment to spy on him.  For Ty, that made all the difference.  Ty was not hired to seduce Zane.  

Del, though, was hired to seduce Corbin to get close to him.  The fact he fell for him afterwards complicated it for him, and he tried to show Corbin that his love came from that and was not fake.  Something very hard to do when this situation happens.  Ty sympathized with that.  Ty experienced that.  He chose to seduce Eva because of his assignment in Nola, and because of that, Ty always felt guilty when Eva fell for him.  

Ty knows he can use his seductive skills to get anything he wants, but he also knows that is not entirely fair to the person involved.  So even though Ty was presented with someone he wanted and someone he knew he could charm into loving him, Ty held back.  Even though Ty’s mission was to get close to Zane, Ty held back.  Ty wanted something pure in his life, and that purity was found in his love for Zane.  Ty hoped Zane too realizes theses distinctions between situations. 

Ty’s only worry was whether or not Zane would get on the same page. 

I 100% stole this idea from the HBO War fandom, who stole it from the Les Mis fandom, but it seemed like a really cool idea and toboldlydammitjim badgered me until I agreed to do it.

The goal of this is to map the C&R/Sidewinder Fandom. It would allow you to find a fan in your timezone, that might be awake to talk, and hey, if you’re comfortable with it, you could even find someone to meet up with in person. And it would give us all a visual representation of how many of us there are.

Adding your mark is super simple and it only takes like 2 seconds

1. Go to this link. 2. Go to the “Additions” tab at the top, left hand side of the map, and then click “Add Marker - Simple.” 3. Put in your name/url/anonymous and location. (Feel free to do the detailed marker too! But that asks for more info than some might be comfortable with.) 

I think everyone has covered all the bits that are ridiculous in this post, except one. The poster accuses Abi is needing to learn the trope Death of the Author. Here, let me put the first paragraph explaining it.

I am a minion. Am I in Abi's inner circle? Nope. I don't need to be, because they share with us the wonders of Abi's imagination.

I don't know what the sale numbers look like, but I do know that there are a whole lot of us, and that we are scattered all around the world. And for most, if not all of us, this fandom and the world Abi created represent an escape from the mundane, the stress and even the horrors of our lives and the world around us. We cherish that escape. It lets us forget even for a little while what is waiting for us out there.

And for someone to dismiss us, makes me stop and say HELL NO!

FAVORITE MALE CHARACTERS » KELLY ABBOTT ♠ NICK O'FLAHERTY ♠ ZANE GARRETT ♠ TY GRADY

Zane brought out his pack of cigarettes, but Ty reached and placed a hand over them. Zane met his eyes, prepared to argue for his right to smoke while they were here, but then Ty pulled one of his cigars out and handed it to Zane instead.

“Cuban?” Zane asked.

“Only if you’re not a Fed.”

“Deal.”

“Where’s your lighter?” Ty asked.

“I lost it.”

Ty flopped his hands dramatically. “This is why we can’t have nice things, Zane!”

The scuff of a boot heel below drew Zane’s attention before he could respond. They both sat up straighter, peering at the edge of the balcony. Zane jumped when a hand reached up and grabbed onto the bottom of the railing. They were five stories high.

A second later, Nick’s head appeared over the edge. All Zane could do was blink at him.

Nick grinned and pulled himself up, rolling over the railing and landing with ease and silence. The man was an impressive specimen, Zane would give him that.

“What the hell, man?” Ty said.

“Maid parked a housekeeping cart in front of our room. We couldn’t get it to budge.”

“So climbing the building was easier than climbing over the cart?”

Nick laughed, then turned to peer over the railing. “Come on, son, you’re getting slow.”

“I really haven’t had occasion to climb buildings in the last couple years, okay?” a voice said from over the edge. “Why do you know how to do this so easily?”

Nick reached down and helped Kelly climb onto the balcony. Kelly leaned against the railing and took a deep breath as Nick clapped him on the shoulder. They both looked at Ty and Zane, grinning.

Ty glanced at Zane, not even trying to explain.

Roux, Abigail (2013-04-06). Touch & Geaux (Cut & Run) (p. 54). Riptide Publishing. Kindle Edition.

Oh honey. I’ve been drinking so here we go.

I think you’re combining two posts here.

I’m assuming you’re referring to Abi’s post here where she comments on feeling unwanted in her own genre. Her post links to two asks submitted to Riptide Publishing (her publisher).

This ask about WaveCon.

This ask about the sexual orientation of their authors.

Okay.

The ask about WaveCon…. Sam Schooler put it best in her tweet about it, calling it rude and gross.

Here’s the original announcement of WaveCon. It was never pitched as an MM con as the asker so delightfully tried to put forth. It was always pitched as queer con and a celebration of LGBTQ fiction.

Last time I checked, there are far more orientations in the queer community than gay male. I’m a B. Hi.

Heidi Belleau also commented on her twitter which brings us to the crux of the issue here.

When you insist that something is specifically one label and not others, then you discount and ostracize everyone else - people who work damn hard to write stories for you and for others. Insisting that an entire convention on a cruise ship is for gay males only is insulting to the very real people who write damn good stories in queer fiction. Ace, Aro, Bi, Lesbian, Pan, Trans, Queer, Fluid, Variant, Agender, etc. That’s a lot of people.

So many people that you’ve completely cut off and said don’t count.

Plus, specifying that a convention is only for gay males is so… fetishizing. There is this horrible stereotype of readers of queer fiction and that it’s “all straight women ogling gay men” and that is so gross. Asks like that perpetuate that terrible stereotype and it’s something all of us need to put a stop to.

A lot of queer fiction is written by females. A lot of books, surprise, are written by females and yet, time and time again, women are reminded through asks like these that their work isn’t valuable enough. It doesn’t measure up to men’s work. Women authors dominate a lot of categories, yet the recognition goes to males more often than not. It’s a product of systematic sexism and it’s gross and tiring.

Honestly it’s so fucking tiring I cannot even begin to process how exhausted I am with it.

Moving on because I could write an essay on how judgey and rude that is and I don’t want to bore people or just start rage-typing. No one wants that.

The second ask about the orientation of Riptide’s authors…

Basically? It’s none of anyone’s damn business. If you want to buy from queer authors or POC authors or female authors or any other non-straight, non-white, non-cis, non-male qualifying author then that’s awesome and a great thing to do. I encourage everyone to do that, actually.

BUT

It’s rude to ask a publisher which of their authors are queer to satisfy your checklist. What if some of their authors are questioning? What if some of their authors are queer but aren’t out yet? You’ve just made people extremely uncomfortable by basically saying “hey if you don’t out yourself right now then you’re losing my sale” and there are those who aren’t ready to do that yet so what do they do now? Lose the sale and stay quiet? Or do they out themselves in the hopes of getting your business and word-of-mouth sales?

Abi herself spoke on twitter about possibly being ace, but she hasn’t fully figured that out yet. She’s still reading and figuring it out. So does she put herself on that list in hopes that you buy her book even though she might not be ready to apply that label?

(And before anyone asks, she told me I could put that in here)

People may not have a problem with it at face value but, honestly, it made me extremely uncomfortable that someone was asking a business to out authors instead of asking authors directly or finding out information on their own. If an author is out about their orientation and/or gender identity, that information will usually be somewhere easy to find. 

This isn’t the same as asking for POC authors. That is so completely different. You don’t need to ask if someone’s POC do you? And what if someone is white-passing but is still from a non-western culture? What then? Do they qualify then?

What about disabilities? Are you going to ask about disabled or mentally ill authors and have people talk about very real issues in their lives just so you’ll buy their book? And who are you asking? Their publisher? Another third party?

It’s a slippery slope, my friend.

Identity is very personal and to ask for someone’s very personal identity that they may or may not be comfortable with a third party giving out just so you can exercise your capitalistic right to buy books is rude and invasive.

It’s stressful to those who depend on book sales to live but who may not be ready to be out. 

The reason behind wanting to read marginalized voices isn’t wrong. What’s wrong is how they went about doing it. There’s a difference.

But how am I supposed to find out, you ask. It’s just easier to ask the publisher.

I honestly don’t give a fuck about what’s easier. I care about people’s comfort in their own space with their own identity and telling you on their own terms.

Browse their social media. I’m serious. The vast majority of marginalized authors I know, I got to know through social media and what they discuss. They will mention it. They will. I promise.

I don’t think we really have.  Granted, I haven’t been scrolling tumblr much now that I am 9 months pregnant since my ability to sit still has been shot all to pieces.  So if I missed a Kelly (or any) meta, I do apologies.  If you want me to comment on one, please drop me a line.  I hate to miss meta.

—

But sweet Kelly.  We got to see him so very, very angry.  To the point of actually raging, which was a sight to behold.  It is such rare an event even the rest of Sidewinder didn’t know what to do with him.  

And Nick just took it.  Thought he deserved it.  Oi.  But that is another meta.  This one is about Kelly.  Rage monkey Kelly as we came to call him during beta time.

The fact Kelly was more hurt at the fact Nick didn’t let him help than the fact Nick did it, says a lot.  Kelly was so hurt that Liam took the special slot Kelly thought was his.  At first on the Fiddler when Kelly found Nick, he got aggressive at Nick, but once he knew the full story, all the aggression Kelly built up was directed purely at Liam leaving him just sad towards Nick. 

“You told me once, remember? Back when you still trusted me.”

- Abigail Roux. Crash & Burn (Kindle Locations 3758-3759).

Oh, rip my heart out.

Then he learned Nick was captured…then probably killed on the street…Kelly, in this book, went through an emotional grinder similar to the physical one Nick went through.  And at the end of the book, Kelly is left in limbo similar to Nick as well.  They are tethered to each other now. 

I find it interesting how Kelly latched onto Nick here.  It is not purely physical lust but a partnership thing.  Kelly wanted to be the one Nick turned to in order to help him get shit done.  Kelly constantly says it. 

“We’re a team.” (loc 1521) 

“Then we’ll be things in the dark together.” (loc 4573).  

Kelly wanted that place, the place of distinction, in Nick’s world, and the fact Nick thought he needed to protect Kelly and not include him (even for good sniper-Liam reasons) just hit all the wrong places in Kelly.  Kelly was left feeling second best.  Feeling inadequate.  Feeling like a possession and not a partner.  Kelly wants to be more dark than Nick wants him to be.  Nick puts things up on a shelf to admire and protect.  Kelly says fuck that and climbs off the shelf.  (huh, I know that feeling)

The hard part of these two is the fact they do know each other so well and they are still working out what they really mean to each other.  They are laid back together and comfortable, but there is a formalness to their relationship that is lacking that they both seem to feel.  Maybe it is the fact they are suppose to be engaged yet both don’t consider it that official.  Like Ty and Zane were calling each other fiancée from the moment Zane said yes, yet Kelly was reserved to bring it up to sober Nick.  That fear has been there long enough that it has tainted their relationship a bit, especially now that Kelly understands why Nick never brought it up.  They really need to root that out and disinfect it.  Maybe in P&P.  It doesn’t have to be addressed now though, but for them to move on, it really should be.

As for badass Kelly, it was so lovely to see him in action.  I love love when he threw the knife at Liam (loc 3765).  That is the most deadly accurate rage Kelly moment to me.  More proof that Kelly is right in that he is an equal partner with Nick.  Now if only Nick would let him tarnish his soul with Nick…but again, that is another meta about Nick and his religious hangups that I will get to.

Heh, “let him”.  Yeah, that is also why Kelly was raging.  Kelly realized Nick wasn’t “letting” him play with him.  Maybe this is just a Melody me-thing, but I bristle at the word “let”, so I imagine Kelly does too.  Though based on evidence from C&B, Kelly doesn’t appreciate “being handled” either.  Kelly would prefer to make his own mind up, thank you.  I hope Nick will honor that next time.  

Huh, I didn’t realize I saw this much of myself in Kelly.  I wonder if I am projecting…which I don’t normally do but with this early a development of a character, I might.  We shall see.  If I am wrong, I will change my views.  But as of now, I am understanding Kelly’s rage quite a bit.

As most of you have heard by now, my original plan for Nick O’Flaherty was an on-page death, just like Kelly. I had to write the scene to convince myself it couldn’t be done, and Nick’s death was scrapped very early on and he got his own book instead (which was then famously ruined, but whatever).

Since I shared Kelly’s death scene with all of you, I might as well share the other half of the fated couple’s death too and see how many of you cry.

The plot surrounding this scene is no more, so just roll with it and be forewarned before clicking this.

No, I don’t think so. I think that was a horrible accident and nothing more than that. Burns’ focus on Zane didn’t really come until Zane was assigned to go UC in Miami and Burns realized he could use him for his own monetary gains.

Now, Burns could have used Zane’s spiraling grief and depression over his wife’s death to his advantage by putting him on an assignment that we can all agree was probably one of the worst things to do to a man in Zane’s mental state.

Oh honey.

See, I never thought Ball & Chain was all about Nick to begin with.  The fact the cartel was behind all of the deaths (expect Burns which, ok was all Nick there) and mayhem was an effort trying to frame Zane drove it home to me that the book was about Zane.  Yes it was events against Ty’s family, but that too was to drive a wedge between Ty and Zane which is Zane’s strongest alliance. 

This concept that Ball & Chain was all about Nick came from a portion of the fandom that could not see past his dominate role.  They considered his ability to get shit done as him taking over Ty and Zane’s rolls in badassery.  It was really a bit of territorialism for them.  He had his own book, and he should be the start of that. 

But what they did not consider is that Ball & Chain was book 8 of 9.   There was a reason Abi wrote him so in charge.  She saw the whole arc, and now the fandom does too.  We see why Nick was so prominent in that book.  He needed to be to understand his role in Crash & Burn.  We needed to see how he hid his murdering of Burns amongst all the carnage.  See why he was at odds with Ty.  Now that it is all clearly laid in front of you, when you go back and read all 9 books at once, you can see the arc completed.  (A fact that will get even more tight when Abi gets the rights back and can clean up some the plot inconsistencies that shifted when she took over the series and moved to riptide with better editing. - When in doubt, always go with the later books for canon information.)

It is this arc that Abi was writing from the beginning of Armed & Dangerous when she took over the series.  She set out the craft a set of books and not just one book at a time.  She had a master plan, and she executed it.  Yes of course some thing shifted (like Nickels), but over all, she planned for Nick to be so competent in one book and then fail and be broken in the next.  

The Cut & Run series, the very essence of the books, is about Ty and Zane and their path to being together forever.  All that buzzing around them, all that influencing them, all that trying to drive them apart is what makes the books theirs.  They held firm together through all of it and helped each other survive it.  Whether it be mountain lions, blinding bombs, bitchy socialite moms, hoodoo bags, or ex-Marine buddies of Ty’s dad. 

That. Right there. The entire series was about Ty & Zane. The others in their lives (including Nick) revolved around them, fought for them, bled for them, and did everything for them. To say any part of this series was anyone else’s book(s) just boggles my mind.

Between A&D and T&G the stage was set for the bond Ty & Nick had.  They always came when the other called, Nick risked crossing the Feds and was actually arrested for his part in A&D.  Ty risked any number of cases by showing up in NOLA because Nick needed him.  Nick is the white knight, and B&C cemented that.  We’re led to believe that Ty’s lies and deceptions that were forced into the light in T&G broke that bond.  Without Nick being a badass, or playing a major role in B&C, we wouldn’t have as clear a picture to understand what Nick was really giving up so Ty & Zane could have the HEA.  We wouldn’t know how devastated Ty was that Nick was keeping things from him, or that their friendship might be crumbling.  Without Ty having that bond stretched to the point of breaking, he wouldn’t grow as a person.  He would continue to do things the way he always did, and damn the consequences. The line in C&B where Ty recognizes he doesn’t always think with his head shows that growth; he’s accepting that his actions and decisions can hurt people he cares for.   Even the scene at the beginning that focuses solely on Nick as he interacts with his family is important.  We learn how much Nick hates his father, and that its entirely justified from the abuse he suffered and protected his sisters from.  The fact that he had major surgery to save the man underlines just how string his moral compass is so when faced with the choice of having Ty hate him, or letting Ty get killed, there is no contest.  The path he takes is hella dark, and without Nick’s scenes in B&C, we wouldn’t know how out of character that is for him, and therefor would feel like Ty’s feeling of complete betrayal is overkill.

If Nick was relegated to a role similar to the one he had in A&D, the conflict between him and Ty wouldn’t make sense, and Ty wouldn’t have had the character development we saw in C&B.  T&G and B&C was Zane growing and learning to live life for himself.  By the end of T&G, he’d figured out everything he’d done was for someone else and he was too busy living vicariously instead of living.  We see in B&C how Zane has changed; he’s more relaxed, more at home in his own skin.   His transformation started in T&G and we saw the results in B&C.   Ty hadn’t gone through that yet.  We saw him start his own emotional growth spurt at the end of B&C.  With Nick.  

Like Tris and Mel said, I don’t think Ty and Zane would have been able to develop a strong and healthy relationship without Nick there as a catalyst.

Oh honey.

See, I never thought Ball & Chain was all about Nick to begin with.  The fact the cartel was behind all of the deaths (expect Burns which, ok was all Nick there) and mayhem was an effort trying to frame Zane drove it home to me that the book was about Zane.  Yes it was events against Ty’s family, but that too was to drive a wedge between Ty and Zane which is Zane’s strongest alliance. 

This concept that Ball & Chain was all about Nick came from a portion of the fandom that could not see past his dominate role.  They considered his ability to get shit done as him taking over Ty and Zane’s rolls in badassery.  It was really a bit of territorialism for them.  He had his own book, and he should be the start of that. 

But what they did not consider is that Ball & Chain was book 8 of 9.   There was a reason Abi wrote him so in charge.  She saw the whole arc, and now the fandom does too.  We see why Nick was so prominent in that book.  He needed to be to understand his role in Crash & Burn.  We needed to see how he hid his murdering of Burns amongst all the carnage.  See why he was at odds with Ty.  Now that it is all clearly laid in front of you, when you go back and read all 9 books at once, you can see the arc completed.  (A fact that will get even more tight when Abi gets the rights back and can clean up some the plot inconsistencies that shifted when she took over the series and moved to riptide with better editing. - When in doubt, always go with the later books for canon information.)

It is this arc that Abi was writing from the beginning of Armed & Dangerous when she took over the series.  She set out the craft a set of books and not just one book at a time.  She had a master plan, and she executed it.  Yes of course some thing shifted (like Nickels), but over all, she planned for Nick to be so competent in one book and then fail and be broken in the next.  

The Cut & Run series, the very essence of the books, is about Ty and Zane and their path to being together forever.  All that buzzing around them, all that influencing them, all that trying to drive them apart is what makes the books theirs.  They held firm together through all of it and helped each other survive it.  Whether it be mountain lions, blinding bombs, bitchy socialite moms, hoodoo bags, or ex-Marine buddies of Ty’s dad. 

That. Right there. The entire series was about Ty & Zane. The others in their lives (including Nick) revolved around them, fought for them, bled for them, and did everything for them. To say any part of this series was anyone else’s book(s) just boggles my mind.