Bet he feels like an elephant shaking his big grey trunk for the

I didn’t even say you were a bad brother. The only reason you’re getting boring is because I have you over all the time. But, it hasn’t even been only this. You’re been so moody for a long time. Like when you got super mad about me going on a date without your permission. I love you but you’ve been so not nice recently and you overreact about everything.

I didn’t get mad that you went on a date and you definitely don’t need my permission. But you know how you don’t want to hear about my sex life? I don’t want to hear about yours, either. When I tell you I don’t want the details, I truly do not want to hear them. Okay, alright. I’m sorry if I’ve been in a shitty mood, but you aren’t really helping, either. I’ll just see you later.

I am, yeah. You’re interested in the military, huh? Tic, cool name. I’ll go with that. What’s stopping you from joining?

Kind of. I've been thinking about it. School isn’t really my thing, you know? I feel like I’m just wasting everyone’s time. It’d be cool to feel that kind of purpose. I guess nothing? I don’t know how my family would take it. What branch are you in?

I don’t give a fuck if you have other friends. What I care about is the fact that you have to put me down in order to do it. Like, why do you have to have other friends because you’re getting bored with me? Why can’t you just have them because you want them? I’m honestly just tired of you constantly telling me how shitty I am when I would do anything for you. So, okay, have other friends. But I’m not going to be at your beck and call anymore if you see me as that much of a shitty brother.

So I have a lot of new followers. I’ve clearly been M.I.A for too long. This is what happens when you volunteer at a recruiting station. I’m just feeling nostalgic about the military. Gross, right? Let me enjoy being a civilian while I can. Anywho, my name is Chavelle. You can call me Che, or whatever your heart desires. 

You’re in the military? That’s pretty fucking cool. I’ve been mulling that over myself, honestly. That’s not important, though. I’m Atticus. Most call me Tic? I don’t really fucking care either way, though.

buried under piles of snow.

I fucking hate this snow. Like, honestly, I hate running inside on treadmills because it feels ridiculous but it’s too icy to be outside. Trust me, I’ve tried. And every time I wipe the fuck out. 

So, who wants to be a part of this new short movie I’m working on? 

Is it actually good? Would I get to take my shirt off? There are too many questions.

Nope, you can’t, I’m in charge of you. But I feel like I’ve seen you every day for like months and I need less of you and more friends. Plus you never come fast enough when I’m hungry or scared.

Alright, cool. I guess I’ll just go fuck off then.

Perfect has seven letters, you know what else has seven letters? Zachary. So unless you know another cutie pie, hold the actual pie, I need people to apply to live with me because I can’t be alone and Caleb is moved into a dorm until next year and I need a person to kill the odd bug and stop me from inviting Atticus over every night because he is getting boring.