Fandomania

Watching your favorite sports team is just gambling but instead of using money you use your happiness.

Do you ever just laugh about SG-1 because the show’s name is literally Stargate: Stargate One

Nope but I’m gonna start.

#i don’t know why we would expect more from a show that gives fancy human and alien technology the dorkiest names imaginable #and then disguises that by using acronyms #like have you ever really thought about DHD and GDO and how very seriously they use those acronyms #especially sam carter with her serious science face like here sir let me show you this device #it cost approximately a billion dollars to invent and it’s the only thing between you and certain death by non-rematerialization #and smacking your molecules against the iris #we call it a garage door opener (x)

if there was a post to describe australia, this is it

wake up australia 

It’s cold here, so they just bounce off the windows and lie there and twitch spasmodically while you look for the shovel.

Basically hurling themselves at windows is the worst thing birds do

yeah man a kookaburra literally flew into a classroom at my high school and just sat his smug ass down on top of the desk for a good 20 minutes

why has nobody mentioned the fact that in australia there are 3-4 months a year where everybody just accepts that they’re going to get attacked by magpies. It is literally called “swooping season” and these birds will fly down to peck your fucking face, and people get their eyes ripped out and shit, it’s fucking brutal.

My teacher had to go to hospital and have surgery because of swooping season. It was in the parking lot of school and all the kids would do a mad dash towards the car as the magpies tried to kill us.

no but when you’re 12 years old and riding your bike like mad on the way home from school with an icecream bucket on your head with like branches and shit sticking out if it to scare them off and none of this is considered strange

what the actual fuck australia 

I am pretty sure all of these Australia stories are a massive, globally-spanning trolling effort, and only the people who have visited the country are allowed to be in on the joke.

not so much now but my dad always told me stories of back in the seventies how one bird in a flock would be hit by a car and be dead on the road and then the other birds would fly down to mourn/help/check or whatever and then they would be hit by cars and at the end of the day you would have sixty dead cockatoos on the road

My first school had a magpie that would only swoop people wearing pink

“umop apisdn” is “upside down” spelled upside down with different letters of the alphabet.

FUCK I JUST GOT IT

It makes sense that the Pope has a twitter account. He is the world’s most famous social media consultant. His entire job is running a PR campaign for God.

This gave me goosebumps holy shit

i reblogged this as soon as i pressed play now i am gonna finish it

imagine if sirius got married and had a kid and they were arguing and the kid was like ‘are you serious?’ and he’d be so torn. what dad joke does he make?? ‘why yes i am sirius’ or ‘no im not serious, im dad’? which one? which one would he make??? i dont know

EXPECTO PETROLEUM

#‘well I think that thing is certainly a thing meanwhile would you like these facts you already know’ #‘excuse me I need to go talk to the coach about an excuse’ #‘I have forgotten how to speak English today it’s very strange’ #every reporter in Pittsburgh is going to have headaches [via souridealist]