[uncontrolable cackling]

honestly i just really identify with persephone because sometimes i want to wear sundresses and flower crowns and skip through meadows but other times i want to wear all black and make everyone around me quiver in fear and i want to bring powerful men to their knees and i am also a literal goddess

Under capitalism, we are all the April Fool

i think……. we should cancel 2016

im short & bitter

Date a boy who’s tall. Date a boy who’s sarcastic. Date a boy who’s mysterious. Date a boy who likes toffee peanuts. Date a boy who likes ripping off tourists. Date a boy with an eye patch. Date a boy who cares about his family. Date Grunkle Stan.

Update: this dude just ordered 100 chicken nuggets. He is officially my idol.

I used to be that person who read two 400-page books a week. Now I carry around a book with me everywhere I go to try and remember what it feels like to feel that connection within the pages because I can’t concentrate to read further than a paragraph, or remember it, for that matter. Every time I see someone engrossed in a novel, it’s bittersweet, because I miss what it is like to get lost in the written word. I just want to be able to read like that again.

i would sleep so much better with your arms wrapped around me

and in unrelated news, the catholic church has just published a canonical addition to the bible in which it is revealed that jesus christ has actually been working for the devil for the past two thousand years. “hail satan,” he says at the end of the new book.