what have these mfs done to me

Been listening to Sabrina

Osomatsu san x slime rancher

Osomatsu

Okay so, like everyone on the list there's an obvious slime and an actual slime that represents them. Ik the obvious slime would be a pink slime, since they're both the default. But, hear me out, I feel like he'd be lucky slime

I feel like they're both kinda aloof and both are kinda plain. Plus the lucky cat is perfect since its like a gamble if you can give it a hen hen in time. So I think osomatsu would be a lucky slime. Plus the fact that osomatsu made it to 24 w/ out dying or getting thrown onto the streets is pretty lucky.

I think he could cultivate a lot of pink largos mixed with whatever other slime he can find that isn't hard to take care of. He's too lazy to find all their food and jusybfeeds them whatever food he finds.

Karamatsu

Okay, again, easy answer is a rock or even crystal slime but the mosaic slime is more him. He'd probably be super into the dangerous yet alluring nature of the slime, plus they're literally shimmering.

Karamatsu would want to look dazzling and alluring even if it can be painful for others. He just cannot let go of his sparkle, and he'd probably be so poetic about the random bursts of flames.

Hed cultivate all the pretty but deadly slimes, like rock, crystal, rad, mosiac, boom, and fire. Hes constantly getting beat up but he thinks its so worth it.

Choromatsu

Of course the obvious answer is rad or tangle, or even the phosphor slime, but i think he'd be a saber slime, idk, i think its the mouth.

There's no other reason tbh, maybe if it wasnt that then id say a boom slime?? They both have dumb faces and sometimes get so pent up they explode(not sexually) but I still say saber slime

I think choro would mainly have easy going slimes, like the yolk slime or the water slime. Something practical but valuable.

Ichimatsu

Easy answer is tabby, saber, or hunter. I think though, and hear me out, he'd be a puddle slime. Shy and cannot be around other slimes least he gets constipation. Well, ig its kinda the opposite for him.

Idk, I just think the idea is cute. Hes a gloomy little puddle slime who floats around all day and gets blushy and shy when you come near him.

He does have like literally every cat like slime on his island, and only cat like slimes.

Jyushimatsu

Ooo, this one's fun. I feel like hes either a quantum slime or a quicksilver. Both make sense but I feel like quantum slimes because they both have that same happy face.

I could see jyushi being a quicksilver too, feeding off of electricity, zipping around literally none stop. He'd either be one or have them, plus i feel like he could bat the energy bolts.

Othwr then that i feel like he doesn't rlly ranch, he hunts for the slimes he needs then releases them. So he doesn't have one particular slime.

Todomatsu

Ik he should be a mosaic since they're so sparkly and pretty, but i feel like he could be the ring tail slime. They're both so cute and mischievous it jusy makes sense!

I could totally see him eating one of your other slimes food then using his cute face to get away with it. He probably sticks his tongue out and uses his puppy dog eyes.

this was meant to be a quick doodle but it took like 3-4 hours but whatever its cute

The boys w/ periods

Osomatsu

He thinks its so gross, sorry. You mention it once and he gags and asks you to never talk about it again. Then you remind him that this is gonna happen at least once every 28 days or so. So he needs to suck it up or break it up. He chooses to suck it up(not literally)

Has no idea how to deal w/ it. He suggests some dumb stuff like drinking or even smoking even if you don't do either. He thinks that if you numb the pain it'll help.

Eventually he slowly begins to figure it out. Offering you sweets and cookies, being all sweet to you, especially if youre under the trans umbrella. It can be hard when your body is actively fighting against you.

Is still kinda bad at comforting you. All he really knows is how to comfort his brothers. So he sits you in his lap and you two play two player video games in a pillow fort. He'll make bad jokes and rage at the game cause he knows you find it funny.

Will go to the store to buy you pads. Kinda shameless when he gets over his fear of menstrual blood. He will call you middle of the isle and loudly ask "hey baby, what pussy size you need today?"

Karamatsu

Omfg hes so dramatic, hes punching the air, hes kicking his feet. He's like "DAMMIT, why them, it should have been me! Take me instead you foul beast!" *rips shirt off*. It's do funny you forget that youre in so much pain.

He does ask his mom for advice though, she helps him out. She actually comes over and takes care of you, mama-matsu treats you like her child, but better since you manage to get one of her shit head children out of her house.(maybe the rest too if you'd he so willing).

After that though hes actually a great help, he'll literally wait on you hand and foot. He runs to the store to buy ice cream, he reheats your pads, literally anything you need he will go above and beyond.

Also great for cuddles, he can shut up when commanded. Just knowing hes being useful is enough. Also really great at dealing with you rapid mood swings. You could be laughing, crying, then angry and he'd be smiling through all of it. May cry if you cry though.

If your transgender, especially a Trans man, he uses like, rlly cringe gender affirmative words to refer to your stuff?? He calls your sanitary shit like battle gear, and your heating pad your fuckin blood warmer idk. Just dumb shit that makes you laugh cause wtf hes always doing too much??

Choromatsu

Hes a little grossed out, but hes actually done the most research. He figured he'd have a girlfriend and usually they have periods. Maybe it didn't work out exactly as planned but youre happy hes at least competent.

Gets really blushy when you mention it the first time and kinda freaks out. It just feels so intimate and he freaks out over saying the wrong thing. You have to give him some time to reboot.

Eventually does get the hang of it and sometimes he gets flustered when you mention it, he just nods and asks if you need anything.

Kinda makes a whole schedule for you, he read a lot of things and makes a whole list of things you need to do. Including exercise and foods you should eat. He of course gives you sweets, you have to nourish the mind AND the body. Kinda treats you like you have an illness, just without the chance he'll catch it.

He gets very nervous when buying sanitary products. He treats it like hes buying a dildo or something. His head is on a swivel and has no idea what cashier to go to. He's socially awkward leave him be.

Ichimatsu

He has no idea what hes doing and terrified. Doesnt know what's happening, feels like he needs to ask, he doesn't ask. Please be patient with him he just wants to do his best.

Honestly you kinda need to tell him if you need help. He doesn't wanna patronize you and treat you like a helpless baby but if that's what you need hes fine with it! You just gotta tell him or he won't be able to help.

Surprisingly tender and sweet when you get emotional or worked up. He pulls you in his arms and bushes you gently and let's you talk it out. He'll turn off the lights and you two just lay together sweetly.

Also very protect of you if you wanna be babied, he sees youre really sensitive and so his dark aura gets really intense. You watch people literally run from you two as you walk by. Then you look at ichimatsu and hes blushing at you shyly.

Likes using cats instead of heating pads. He'll find the fattest, warmest, and chillest cat he can find and bring it home. Then without warning he shoves it under your shirt and you just pray it's not gonna kill you.

If you ask him he will give you head WHO SAID THAT?!?!?!

Jyushimatsu

Oh he has no idea what's happening, has never even heard of a period til today. Once he learns about it, he literally asks you if youre just peeing blood. Although I fear if your a transgender man he gets even more confused cause like??? What do you mean some guys bleed down there??

Please don't ask him to run errands, he'll get them done but i don't think the store will ever be the same. You read about it later on your phone. It's so horrifying that you can't look him in the eyes for a day.

Will do his damn hardest to keep your spirits up, hes doing funny little dances, hes doing his lil tricky tricks, hes being your truly devoted jester.

Loves how cuddly you get but hates your mood swings. He gets confused quickly as to what is happening and why your crying then suddenly happy again. Please explain to him it's not his fault. He's just your little guy.

Will lay his head on your stomach to see if he can hear the blood. If he can he likes to listen to it and narrate what's happening. You honestly have no idea if hes BSing cause it's like, weirdly mundane and kinda accurate. He's just sitting there and is like "oh! Another piece of the egg fell out." As you watch TV. How strange.

Todomatsu

Actually knows what hes doing, thank God. Hes already stocked with everything which is kinda weird but hes so ready. Hes got pads AND tampons w/ two sizes. Hes got a stash of candy bars and tea to sooth you.

I feel like hes become like actually good friends with a lot of his old coworkers even if things didn't work out. He learns a lot through them and is actually super caring for them.

He likes to give you spa days where he can pamper you. He reminds you he thinks your gorgeous and he loves every part of you, even the blood.

Handle any mood changes like a champ, hes honestly not afraid to sass you especially when youre being sparky. He doesn't care how tired or bad you feel you can use your grown up words.