Velvet Eclipse

“When did this happen?” she asks quietly, pulling back enough to look at her. “How long ago?” She asked. “Damn it. I should have known….” Spilled out before she could stop herself. Of course she hadn’t known.She’d spent so many years drifting in and out, disappearing when things got hard, missing birthdays and holidays and entire chapters of people’s lives.

Her hand rested on Celeste’s arm, squeezing gently. “I’m sorry, honey. I’m so sorry. I can’t even imagine…” she admits quietly. “You two were together forever. He was family.” She swallowed hard, offering a sad little smile as she listened.

Celeste forced a smile as Saffron's faded. She offered a small shrug, taking a deep breath. She hated thinking about. It had been a pretty intense time and things were just beginning to feel like they were settling down. Even though there were still so many times when something would happen and she would want to call him. She would want to tell him about her day. He had been her best friend. She hugged Saffron tight, leaning in and planting a kiss on her cheek.

"It's been the last year. It was pretty hectic. It was so random. A bursted aneurysm. Then we did the funeral and I sat around the house for a while, but I couldn't do it... It was too much empty space. Too many reminders." She'd even switched bedrooms to try and escape his memory but it hadn't helped. Home seemed like the best option. "I'm not upset with you. I could have probably figured out how to call you, but I was just... a zombie."

A burst aneurysm. Just like that. And somehow she’d survived ten plus years of addiction like a nuclear fallout cockroach.“Thank you for sayin that..” she spoke quietly, letting out a big breath of relief “I don’t know if I’d forgive me, not so easily anyway.. so… thank you. I promise I’ll step up, be a better auntie to my nephew and a sister to you from now on.”

Saffron offered a small, grateful smile, though guilt still lingered behind it. “You’re right, no more sad talk.” She agreed with a nod. “God. My mouth is watering just thinking about you in the kitchen. You always did make somethin’ that’d make a grown man cry. If I remember right, your biscuits could probably solve most third world problems.”

She bumped her shoulder lightly against hers.“Certainly solved most of mine growing up, anyway, And don’t think I ain’t comin’ by to steal lunch every now and then.”At the question about her own situation, Saffron stalled, shifting a bit.

“I’m… good.” She says it carefully, almost like she’s still getting used to the word. “Really good, actually. Been sober almost ten years now.” She gives a tiny shrug. “Got myself a teaching job too. Fine arts over at the elementary school. I’m stayin’ with Saige and Stevie while I get settled… and I’m tryin’ to be here for real this time. It’s a work in progress, I missed a lot of important milestones, and a lot of years… I just hope I can do it right this time. I don’t think I have much choice..” the pride and her voice fault just a little, because the truth was underneath it all saffron was terrified that if she messed up again, there wouldn’t be a next time or another opportunity with her family. She couldn’t bear losing Saige and Stevie for good. 

“Celeste?” A small nervous laugh left her. The longer she looked the more a smile crept on her face. “Now hold on just one damn minute.” she pointed a finger at her, eyes narrowing suspiciously. “You bring my government name into this conversation and I’m walkin’ right back outta this store.”The warning would’ve carried more weight if she’d been able to hold her stern look for more than a minute, but the smile she’d tried to bite back was already betraying her. God, she’d missed this. Missed having someone in her corner, someone to look up to, argue with, someone who looked at her like she wasn’t the family fuck up. Just her baby sister. “Look at you… still my annoyingly bossy big sister I see.”

“When did this happen?” she asks quietly, pulling back enough to look at her. “How long ago?” She asked. “Damn it. I should have known….” Spilled out before she could stop herself. Of course she hadn’t known.She’d spent so many years drifting in and out, disappearing when things got hard, missing birthdays and holidays and entire chapters of people’s lives.

Her hand rested on Celeste’s arm, squeezing gently. “I’m sorry, honey. I’m so sorry. I can’t even imagine…” she admits quietly. “You two were together forever. He was family.” She swallowed hard, offering a sad little smile as she listened.

He chuckled. "I like to think I can be both. I mean I don't need to have perfect order. But the kids need to learn to settle and listen when instruction is happening." he said then shook his head. "Oh if it is I'll love it. It's supposed to be engaging and fun. And you won't been the only one with glitter monsters." he joked. "I'm a second grade teacher Mr. Torres, but Lalo is fine. Sometimes I just let the kids have at it with some art based project. "

“I haven’t even made it through my first week and you’re tellin’ me I’m gonna be findin’ glitter in my hair till Christmas?” Her eyes sparkle with amusement. “I guess it’s a good thing I like to sparkle then, huh?” She wasn’t afraid to get dirty “Second grade? That’s a fun one. Big feelings, little attention spans, and somehow always sticky. I miss when my girl was that small.” She points at him playfully.

Crossing her arms over her chest, Celeste pretended to look like a scolding parent. “Saffron Boone walks up into town and doesn’t even bother to tell her sister. I should use your legal name for that sort of behavior…” she teased her, smirking a bit. Of course, she was no better. She hadn’t bothered to tell Saffron she was coming back to Cypress Cove. Sometimes surprises were better.

“Celeste?” A small nervous laugh left her. The longer she looked the more a smile crept on her face. “Now hold on just one damn minute.” she pointed a finger at her, eyes narrowing suspiciously. “You bring my government name into this conversation and I’m walkin’ right back outta this store.”The warning would’ve carried more weight if she’d been able to hold her stern look for more than a minute, but the smile she’d tried to bite back was already betraying her. God, she’d missed this. Missed having someone in her corner, someone to look up to, argue with, someone who looked at her like she wasn’t the family fuck up. Just her baby sister. “Look at you… still my annoyingly bossy big sister I see.”

When she asked what Stevie was like, he looked at her. “She’s stubborn,” he said. “Runs straight at things instead of around ’em. Always has.” A small smile flickered across his face. “She talks with her hands when she’s excited. Gets that from Saige.” He nodded at her. “And she’s got your laugh. Same one. Comes outta nowhere and fills a whole room.” He let that sit there between them for a minute before continuing. “She’s kind,” he added. “Too kind sometimes. Looks after people when she shouldn’t have to. Learned that young.” He nodded. “She grew up alright,” he said more firmly then, meeting her eyes again. “Saige made sure of that. Though, she does shut herself off a bit. She had a boyfriend, Ryder. She still won’t really talk about what happened between them.”

Her question about whether Stevie had been scared when she left made him feel protective. “Yeah,” he said gently. “She was. But kids are tougher than we give ’em credit for. She didn’t break. She asked about you for a long time. Then she stopped askin’ out loud. She didn’t stop missin’ you,” he added after a second. “Just figured missin’ somebody ain’t the same as gettin’ ’em back. If you’re stayin’, you should tell her. If you aren’t.. you should just go, Saff.”

“God…” she laughed weakly, shaking her head. “Of course she did.” Her girl had never given up on her. It should have been a relief but all she felt was guilt. She listened quietly after that. About Stevie’s laugh. Her kindness. The boyfriend. The missing pieces of a daughter she doesn’t know anymore. Every detail felt precious.Every word something she should’ve been there to witness herself. She vowed then she’d never miss another second.

“I know.” she agreed softly when told her Stevie had been scared. “I know she was.”A long breath leaves her.“The truth is…” she swallows. “I left because I thought I was gonna destroy them. Especially after that horrible day…” Her voice cracks slightly.“Every time I came back, I’d get clean for a little while and think maybe I could do it. Then I’d fall apart again.” She shakes her head. “I couldn’t stand the idea of Stevie rememberin’ me as the mama who kept breakin’ promises.” Her fingers tighten around the sugar.“So I stayed gone until I knew.”

This time her eyes lift to his.“I’m stayin’, Wyatt.” No hesitation. No joke.Just truth. “I got clean, I got a steady job, I came home. I got ten years sober behind me and a whole lotta people I wanna make things right with. Maybe you’re right, maybe I should’ve come home sooner. But the truth is, I couldn’t forgive myself if I came home and let them now again. I won’t let them down again.” she said it with every ounce of a mother’s conviction that she could muster.“And hear this, and know it to be true, Stevie Boone is never gonna have to wonder where her birthday cake’s comin’ from again. Or miss her mama’s. Because her mama is home, and I’m gonna make it every year until the day I die.” She let out a watery laugh.

She let out a small breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding and folded her arms across her chest, a small protective gesture. She wasn’t sure how to feel when Saffron called her beautiful, especially since she said it to Saige and not her. “Yeah, I do that. Grow.” She wasn’t trying to be cold, she was just trying to process it all.

She watched the way Saffron pushed her hair back, the familiar movement that bringing a wash of memories. Pancakes in the morning, late night songs. “You’re… here,” she said after a moment. She looked at them both. “I didn’t mean to interrupt anything…”

A nervous laugh slipped out of her after a minute and she looked at Saige like they had been caught with thier hands in a candy jar.. “Nothin’ we can’t continue later…” She gave Saige’s arm a squeeze that said they certainly would be. “We were waiting for you to get home actually! We wanted to surprise you! I was going to make dinner and everything...” Then her gaze dropped to the bag in Saige’s hand. “Heavenly is what they smell! I used to dream about those burgers.” She laughed. “ Maybe I could make up some potato salad to go with it? Or desert for you two? ” She offered, grateful for the distraction.

Her thumb brushed cautiously across her lipstick before she looked back at Stevie, and just… stared for a second. God. She was so grown up. The same eyes. The same stubborn little expression she’d had at five years old when she’d refuse to wear matching socks. “Grew up too fast my liking is what you did… I’m sorry I wasn’t here to see it.” Her eyes watered over, her head shaking in disbelief.

“If there ain’t enough pickles on yours, I’ll find some. Pretty sure I owe you at least a lifetime supply. You used to love it when I’d make a little smiley face of pickle pieces…” She wondered if Stevie remembered that, liking extra pickles on her burgers, or if she’d been too small. Changed too much.

“But, uh…” Her eyes found Stevie’s again. “I’m home. Not just for supper or the weekend.” A nervous smile flickered across her face. “Home, home. I’m better now. Really. I’ve been sober for long enough to trust myself with you, and I got a teaching job at the elementary school and everything. I was hoping I could move back in… I was just discussing it with your daddy.. if you didn’t mind… if it was alright with you both?”

“Oh, I brought you somethin’! i saw it and it just spoke to me, I knew you had to have it..” she held up a small drawstring trinket bag. The first of many gifts, she had a lot of birthdays and holidays to make up for. “I missed you so much..” She hesitated for just a second before opening her arms slightly, not assuming, not pushing.“Could I.. uh.. give you a hug , starshine?”

“Oh no, we are definitely not having a dramatic fall in a store,” she teased as she pulled the box down and handed it to her. “I feel professionally obligated to intervene before that happens.” She gave a small, amused shake of her head. “I’ a special education teacher. I spend most of my day redirecting creative but questionable climbing attempts.” She admitted.

“For what it’s worth,” she added warmly, “you already look exactly like a respectable schoolteacher. I also find that a cardigan helps.” She looked sheepishly as she shifted the hangers on her arm slightly and smiled. “First week at the school?”

“Special ed? That’s amazing. I bet the kids love you. I’ll be teaching fine arts, so maybe we can do some joint lessons for some of the kids?” she adds lightly. “I might need redirectin’ myself some days. Like just now, so thank you again. ”At the compliment, she smooths a hand over her cardigan and grinned.

“Don’t let this fool you too much, I’ve got the mouth of a sailor, and the tattoos to prove it. I’m more of a hippie at heart.” she says, a little softer. “I’m still gettin’ used to lookin’ the part. It’s not really my style, but this is my first job and a really long time and I want to make sure they don’t regret hiring me, well, for the first week or so at least..”

She nodded at the question, shifting the cardigan in her hands. “Yeah, it is. First time teaching period actually, so if things are a little wanky, I apologize in advance for throwing off any grooves. I’m Saffron. ” She shrugs. “How about you? You been at the school long, or am I not the only new face tryin’ to figure it all out?”

He stood from his desk and began to make his over to her chuckling and shaking his head as she swore and then caught herself. "Not so little anymore." He teased with a smile. "It's good to see you Saffy." He said pulling her into a warm hug before pulling back and getting a proper look at her. "You look good." Much better than the last time he had seen her.

"Yeah, who would've guessed the two of us would both end up teaching here?" He quipped shaking his head with a bit of wistful sigh, he certainly never planned on it. "You're in good hands." He assured her. "Been here for..." His eyes widened as he did the math and realized just how long it'd been back since he'd returned to the town he had sworn he never would. "Over 10 years now wow. Any questions you have I have the answers, and if I don't I know where to get them." Bastian insisted. He smiled at her words, he'd always had a soft spot for Saffron since he was a kid, he'd always hated the way her family had treated her, it reminded him of the way his parents had treated Bellamy. Bastian couldn't imagine ever treating your child, any child like that.

"Oh you know, staying busy, trying to help shape the children of this town into decent people." He said "Sometimes it feels like that's easier said than done." He shook his head as a humorless laugh escaped his lips. "Anyway, what about you? How've you been? What brings you back to tiny little Cypress Cove after all these years Saffy?" Bastian asked curiously.

“Yeah, yeah… not so little now, but don’t let it go to your head. I’m still older, sassier, and a biter. ” she rolled her eyes. “You clean up real nice yourself, Bas. Teacher life’s treatin’ you good I see. I’m proud. You deserve to be doing something that makes you feel good..”At his question, she exhaled, taking a moment to really thin before answering.

“I’ve been… worse.. I’m doing better now, much better.” She nods slowly, her voice a bit thick but proud none the less. “I’ve been sober for a while now, so I figured it was about time I came home and did somethin’ with myself that didn’t involve runnin’ from the ones I love any longer.”

Her gaze drifts around the classroom for a second before landing back on him.“My family, Saige, Stevie. My sisters… I didn’t miss this town, but I missed the people. My people… Missed you, if I’m bein’ honest,” she adds, a little more playful. “I wanna show up for the ones I love. Do it right. Be the mother, the fiance, the sister, friend, woman I know I can be.. drinking took so much from me, so much time.. I just.. I want to take my life back. So.. here I am..”

She tilted her head, studying him with that same easy curiosity from years ago. “I’m sure your doing a fine job of Hilton. These young minds grow up to be better than the generation before them, Lord knows somebody needs to be teaching the kids around here how to be decent. If anyone can do it, it’s you. You’ve always had that way about you with people. You’re gentle, kind nurturing. And I’m glad you’re doing good.” she hums. “So tell me, Mr. Mentor… what am I walkin’ into? These kids gonna eat me alive or am I gonna be their favorite by lunch??”

He smiled a bit hearing one of his coworkers. "Well you're in quite a pickle here." he joked. "I don't know if I want to tarnish my reputation as a school teacher." he said even as he reached to help her grab the item it being just in reach for him. "Parents here aren't too bad. Some might judge you but it all washes off in the end when you end up being their kid's favorite teacher."

“You know what , if bein’ the kids’ favorite means I gotta survive a little side-eye from the parents, I reckon I’ll live,” she added with a small shrug. “I’ve been called much worse.” She rolled her eyes playfully.

When he mentioned teaching her brows lifted curiously.

“You teach too? Small world.” She laughed. “I’m saffron, new fine arts teacher..” she asks, leaning her hip against the shelf. “What do you teach? Are you at the academy or local school? More importantly, are you one of the fun ones or the strict kind? I’m just gonna apologize in advance if your classrooms near mine because there’s gonna be a lot of glitter and a lot of singing and banging on instruments.”

Where: Wake Up Coffee Whom: Saffron Boone // @saffron-boone

Morning light spilled soft and gold across the windows of Wake Up Coffee, catching the slow curl of steam rising from his cup of coffee. Tarragon was sitting near the window, enjoying his coffee, the sun, and the peace of morning. His Bible was open in front of him and he was reading his daily passages. He was meeting Saffron for their Saturday check-ins. He had insisted that they could end them whenever she'd like, but he was glad that she hadn't made that decision yet. He remembered when she first stumbled into his chapel, trying to get a hold of the communion wine. He'd offered to let her have it, but only that once and only if she sat and talked to him first. She's done amazing since then. He was so proud of her.

"Am I? Well I'll be, I am on time." She grinned, setting her bag down before leaning in to give him a warm hug. "Who even am I anymore?" She pulled back, eyes dropping to the cup he's already set out for her.

"Of course you remembered" He always did recall little things like that about her, and that's part of why she loved him. "Spoilin' me as always, Father." With a wink she took a sip.

"It's been... good, I think. So far. " she admits, a hint of disbelief in her voice. "Strange, being in charge of a whole room of little kids, if you'd told me I'd be doing that, dressed in soft pastels a few years ago! would have laughed, but.. here I am, somehow I made it!" she joked, but there was an underlying emotion there, her eyes watered up thinking about how far she came. "Principal seems to like me well enough, she took a big chance on hiring me and I don't want her regret it." She admitted. "Oh, Bastian's there! Very old friend. We were kids together, he's been showing me around. So that's been... nice. I don't feel like I'm going in completely blind.

Her fingers curled around the cup. "I think I'm gonna like it." she adds, a little more certain. "They're sweet. Messy, but sweet. None of them cried or got injured on my watch, I'm callin' that a win." A soft laugh followed them she bit her lip.

"Being back's the scary part." she says more honestly. "With Saige... with Stevie." A faint smile tugs at her lips, but there's nerves underneath it. "I just... don't wanna mess it up this time. I can't, if I do, I might lose them forever. Maybe not Saige, but Stevie. I can't.. abandon her again. I've already lost so much time, I'm scared she won't let me in this time as it is.." She took a long sip of her drink. "But I'm here. I'm tryin' my damnest to be good, stay clean, and earn the right to call myself Saige's fiancé, or Stevie's mother. It's all I can do, That's gotta count for somethin", right?"

She took a breath. "What about you, hmm? What has my dear sweet tarragon been up to? Besides saving people's lives? Present company included."

It is HONESTY (NSFW) WEDNESDAY!

This week on honesty Wednesday, we are featuring SEXY questions. Enter at your own risk. These questions are nsfw!

If you are participating, please reblog this! Remember participation is completely optional and does NOT count as activity check! Tag with #cypresscove.honesty and #nsfw.

A... B... C...

It wasn't her dad's shampoo or the laundry soap they’d used forever. It was a scent she hadn’t noticed in years but somehow still recognized immediately. Her stomach dipped before she even understood why. Her eyes caught on the suitcase near the hallway next. “Dad?” she tried again, quieter now as she rounded the corner and stopped.

For a second she didn’t move at all. Saige’s arms around wrapped around her. Saffron’s legs wrapped around his waist. Like no time had passed. Like this was normal. Stevie set the bag of food down carefully on the nearest surface before she dropped it. “…okay,” she said after a moment. Her eyes finally lifted to Saffron’s face properly. She was older but she was real. “…hi, Mom.”

Her eyes soften when he says this is your home. That hits somewhere deep. “I love you, Saige Boone. You will always be my home.” She kisses him with more fire, a soft hum escaping her as she wraps around him. She’s been starved for this. “Missed you… so much…god I love you…” she breathes, half-laughing, her forehead brushing his when he mentions them having some time. “Let’s make the most of it then..”

And then she hears it. The words dad from an all too grown up voice calling to Saige and she freezes.Her head turns first, then the rest of her, and suddenly she’s not wrapped up in him anymore. She’s moving away, smoothing her dress, pushing her hair back like that’ll somehow steady her.Her heart pounds against her ribs as she takes in the beautiful creature before her. Stevie. Half afraid if she blinks she’ll disappear. Even though that’s typically her move.

“Hi, Starshine.” She smiles shakily, her voice catching just a little as she lifts her hand in a small wave. “Oh my gosh…look at you… you got so big!” she lets out a quiet, almost disbelieving laugh, her eyes shining as she takes her in. “She’s beautiful, Saige..” Her eyes never leave Stevie, she’s in pure amazement their love made the woman standing before them. Addiction was hell. Time was a thief. “Im.. back.. I missed you.. so much.. how.. are you?”

“I know you were sick,” he said quietly. “And I know you didn’t wake up one mornin’ and decide to hurt anybody on purpose. But Stevie was a teenager last time she saw you,” he continued, gaze settling on her again. There wasn’t accusation in it exactly. Just truth. He leaned his shoulder against the doorframe now instead of blocking it. “I ain’t sayin’ it was easy and I ain’t sayin’ you didn’t go through hell. But you don’t get to disappear on people and come back expectin’ it to land soft." His eyes flicked briefly next door to Saige’s place, then back to her. “Saige’s gonna want to believe you,” he said. “Hell, he already does. And Stevie...” He paused for a moment. "I don't want to see her hurt again."

He looked at Saffron again, taking in her appearance. “Job’s good,” he nodded. “Sober’s better.” He met her eyes. “I hope you mean it. For real this time.” His gaze softened slightly. “And for the record, I ain’t ever had a grumpy look in my life.”

“I know.” she says “I ain’t expectin’ it to be all smooth, but I’m trying my best. .”Her thumb rubs absently along the edge of the sugar canister. “I thought about her every day, Wyatt. I never stopped.” she adds, voice softer, steadier. “Every birthday I missed, every Christmas… all of it.” A shakeu breath. “She’s the reason I pushed myself to get clean for keeps. I love that kid more than anything in the world.”

Her eyes drift next door for just a second at the mention of Saige.“He always did believe in me more than I deserved, the broken his heart and pieced it back together more times than I can count. I just hope I’ve got enough glue to hold it… I worry he’ll go off me for good one day…” she murmurs, almost to herself, before looking back at Wyatt.

“…What’s she like?” she asks after a second. “Stevie, I mean. I haven’t gotten the chance to talk to her much yet…” Her fingers tighten slightly around the sugar. “I remember… before. When she was a baby, some things from when when she was about five.. But a lot of it is hazy…” she trails off, shaking her head. More than she wants to admit. “Was she scared? When I left? Did she.. grow up alright without me? I was afraid if I stayed I’d just… ruin her like I’d ruined me…” It was difficult to ask, to admit, to open herself up so raw.

She handed the box over with a gentle laugh, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. “And don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me. No PTA moms will ever know how close you came to climbing the shelves,” she added with a playful wink, her voice light and kind. “You’re going to be a teacher? That’s wonderful! What are you going to teach?”

Fallon tilted her head slightly, her expression open and genuinely curious, the kind of easy friendliness that made it clear she was already hoping they’d keep talking.

She taps the box lightly against her palm, grin tugging at her lips. “I appreciate you keepin’ that between us.” she adds, leaning in just a fraction like it’s a secret. “Not that I give a shit about what the PTA moms think, I’d like to make it through my first week without them I whisperin’ about me turning over shelves and possibly I hurting more than my dignity while shopping.”

At the question, her expression brightens. “Fine arts.” she says, a small proud tilt to her chin. “Bit of everything really, paintin’, music, crafts… glitter if I’m feelin’ brave.” A quiet laugh slips out. “Tryin’ to keep the kiddos creative juices flowing.” Her fingers smooth absentmindedly over the front of her cardigan before she glances back up. “First time teaching since I finished getting my degree, So… wish me luck.” She tilts her head, studying Fallon with an easy curiosity. “What about you?”

Leilani giggled softly as she walked over to her and then looked around. Since she wasn't really much taller, she was going to have to become creative in how she helped her out. "I don't mind helping you out at all but I know that we are going to have to come up with something. "Alright, so." She said as she then looked to the side and saw one of the seats people sat on to try on shoes so she pulled it over and she hopped up on it and then she was able to get the item that the woman was looking for.

As she hopped off of the seat, Leilani smile and held out the item to the other. "Here ya go. It looks like you were able to get it. What kind of school teacher are you?"

“First year, I start in a few days. I’m a bit nervous, if I’m honest.” she adds, smoothing a hand over the front of her dress. “Tryin’ to be all respectable an’ whatnot.” Then her eyes land on Leilani. “What about you? You always out here savin’ strangers in thrift stores or am I just today’s lucky winner?”