Sabrinaa ((:

🌈 here is a little rainbow for anyone who is sad today

yes i am smart. yes i am stupid. it’s called being flexible.

Why do witches like always wanna fatten kids up before they eat them?? fat is like the grossest part of meat

“Why hello there, little children~. Please follow me to my magical… FITNESS ROOM. NO P A N S I E S ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT. LEAVE YOUR WHINING AT THE DOOR BECAUSE IT’S LEG DAY AND WE’RE ABOUT TO GET R-R-R-RIPPE D.”

Because they’re always cooking said kids in cauldrons and ovens - aka long cooking times at lowish heat. If you do that to fatty meat, the fat melts completely and the meat gets tear-it-apart-with-a-fork soft. If you do it to lean meat, you get tiny little sad meat bits that bring no joy to anyone.

well you did ask

Also there’s wisdom in fattening them up on sweets and other carbs. A meatless, carb-rich diet makes for more tender and flavourful meat.

you are arguing over the semantics of EATING CHILDREN

Well yeah, you gotta get this shit right or it’s a waste of 40-80 lbs of meat.

plus if you feed them a high fat, low nutrition diet, they’re easier to subdue and less likely to run away, which would be a concern for an elderly crone.

Thank you, Old Witch With Candy House side of tumblr.

what did this bird do

I wish i had context on this 

I don’t think the contexts helps in this case.

I NEVER KNEW THEY MADE THIS MANY THAT’S AMAZING

it’s like i always say: fuck

the concept of people being born in the 00s and being on this website or the internet in general will never stop giving me a minor heart attack every time bc my brain stopped processing time in like 2008 so anyone born in like 2003 is automatically assumed to be in kindergarten until i realize they're old enough to drive

If you rearrange the letters in the light it spells alien

If you add in the partial letters touched by the light it’s “E.T. Alien” 👽

that’ll learn ya

she was just thirsty :(

booty shorts that say this on the butt

I’m making bread

Humans have been on the moon, developed nuclear bombs, and have explored the bottom of the ocean, but we still can’t figure out how to put an image in Microsoft Word without ruining the entire document.

You are probably in the background of someones photo they took in public. For all you know you could be on someones wall and they look at you every day.

everyone who reads this post will get some big spicy joy within 24 large minutes (hours)

pick your battles. pick… pick fewer battles than that. put some battles back. that’s too many 

#aparrently a forensics lab disposed a bag of hands improperly which like. how. how do you do that

don’t worry about it