A lot of us are like Clark in a way. Not in his behaviors or in his inability to want to change but in the way that we will cling to the one piece of identity that makes us special. Even when is all forms except for a technicality we arenβt and havenβt been that thing. Most of us will end up working some dead end job that we never wanted to stay afloat and still walk around Iβm a ______ when youβre not.
Clark wanted to be an architect. He wanted to design, most likely have his name known and be something BE someone. But heβs not. Heβs never been an architect. Heβs a sales man and a shitty one at that.
I myself am a fraud of a βprofessional artistβ. I create, and sketch, and write but I have nothing to really show for it. No completed projects. Just a a decade worth of art that not many people care to see. Iβm stuck working meaningless jobs that I donβt care for just so that I can put food on the table and yet I will refer to myself as an artist every single time someone asks.
Itβs who I am. It who Iβll always be. My love and passion for being an artist is much like Clark. I want it. I crave it. I will go in sane for it but there is a chance I may never reach that dream. Iβm no professional Iβm an amateur at best and a hobbies at worse.
I relate to Clark on his anger and persistence when it comes to being referred to as an architect . (definitely shouldnβt have treated people the way he did but regardless ) Iβve worked so hard to get to this point in my art experience and Iβm still going round and round on my hamster wheel of creativity. Clark the complex man you are. No one can make me form a solid opinion on you .
The only difference between most of us and Clark is most of us want to change. We want to do better and become the version of ourselves we have in our heads. Hopefully we can evolve in ways that Clark refused to. Iβm an artist and I must create.
