rp memes galore

you know what they say about hope. it breeds eternal misery.

you know what they say about hope

i really don't let myself cry in front of anybody.

just assume it's [NAME], you know, sluttin' it up!

why enjoy today when you could be worrying about tomorrow?

coincidences are the devil's way of remaining anonymous.

are you reading that fast or fanning yourself?

you have all the subtlety of a hand grenade.

why are you talking to me like ben franklin?

could you like, not be here right now?

she's gone, but she's everywhere.

he's not a baby squirrel.

the truth always comes out, one way or another.

i'm not scary! am i scary?

hope is a dirty four letter word.

i was just about to put out a new doormat that said 'go away.'

it was not a complete ass kicking by the way!

i've been in the library so much i'm on a first name basis with the homeless man who sleeps next to the microfiche.

i am the smart one.

wow, that is so me of you.

you're small, but you are mighty.

i curse a lot, but it's very therapeutic.

you either love someone or you don't.

what did i do? what did you make me do?

it's made up of facts, doesn't mean it's true.

you are like the queen of not helping!

i can't be arrested again.

panic's a bitch.

we are some distance removed from okay.

i'm abstaining from christmas this year, remember?

never underestimate the power of a good bromance.

when you ask the organ grinder a question, you don't really want to hear from the monkey.

i just get released from a mental hospital and they welcome my friends with tea and crumpets.

you know how i feel about hope.

they don't make a loofah that scrapes out the inside of your head.

uh, drugging yourself is the best alibi ever. classic sharon stone move.

i will destroy her.

just be careful and wear sensible shoes.

i found a way to survive my secrets, but everyone i care about gets hurt.

you don't paper over windows unless you're a vampire.

it must have been affirmative action for goths and emos.

"jester just farted on my fucking pillow."

"i also bark when i have to pee."

"POST SHIT POOP."

"SPLENDIFEROUS."

"you've dinged your last dong."

"fairy weedmother."

"thanks, it's the neurodivergence."

"well, well, well, if it isn't the consequences of my own actions."

"call me lexapro baby."

"AND HE WILL NOT HAVE MERCY."

"please don't steal my bells mr. goose."

"i'm judy chaotic."

"i heard blooming grove and i just went feral."

"honestly, catholicism is just witchcraft with more guilt."

"in a wild turn of events — man bat is broke."

"the autism is autisming hard."

"danger is his middle name."

"i feel abandoned by god in this chili's tonight."

"you're my horticulturalist husband."

feel free to change pronouns/tense/etc. as necessary.

SATANIST.

will you be a satantist with me?

mortgage off your soul to buy your dream vacation home in florida.

will you be an anarchist with me?

sleep in cars and kill the bourgeoisie at least until you find out what a fake i am.

i'd burn the cash and smash my old tv.

will you be a nihilist with me?

if nothing matters, man, that's a relief.

you wonder if you can even be seen from so far away.

you hang on until it drags you under.

WE'RE IN LOVE.

you could absolutely break my heart.

that's how i know we're in love.

we're not swapping blood.

isn't it enough that we stripped down to our skin?

it wasn't flattering, but you listened like it mattered.

i feel crazy in ways i never say.

will you still love me if it turns out i'm insane?

if you rewrite your life may i still play a part?

in the next one will you find me?

i'll be the boy with the pink carnation pinned to my lapel.

i can't imagine you without the same smile in your eyes.

there is something about you that i will always recognize.

ANTI-CURSE.

i'm out of my depth at a public beach.

i guess i did alright, considering.

was anyone ever so young?

you say you don't have to make it bad.

or even a blessing.

LETTER TO AN OLD POET.

i think that you're special.

you once told me that i'm selfish.

you once told me that i'm selfish and i kissed you hard.

maybe i'm just exhausted.

you think you're a good person.

you think you're a good person because you won't punch me in the stomach.

and i love you.

i don't know why.

it looked like it hurt.

it looked like it hurt and i wasn't sorry.

i wasn't sorry.

i should've left you right there.

you don't know me.

i wanna be happy.

i'm ready to walk into a room without looking for you.

i'll go up to the top of our building.

i'll go up to the top of our building and remember my dog when i see the full moon.

i can't feel it yet.

feel free to change pronouns/tense/etc. as necessary.

COOL ABOUT IT.

i'm trying to be cool about feeling like an absolute fool.

i came prepared for absolution.

i came prepared for absolution if you'd only ask.

but i'm trying to forget about it.

once i took your medication to know what it's like.

i ask you how you're doing and i let you lie.

i'll pretend being with you doesn't feel like drowning.

NOT STRONG ENOUGH.

every clock's a different time.

i don't know why i am the way i am.

i am not strong enough to be your man.

i can't stop staring at the ceiling fan.

i can't stop staring at the ceiling fan and spinning out about things that haven't happened.

do you see us getting scraped up off the pavement?

i lied.

i lied, i am just lowering your expectations.

i am just lowering your expectations.

i think i've been having revelations.

REVOLUTION 0.

i just want to know who broke your nose.

if it isn't love, then what the fuck is it?

i don't want to die.

that's a lie.

i used to think if i just closed my eyes i would disappear.

LEONARD COHEN.

if you love me, you will listen to this song.

i didn't tell you you were driving the wrong way on the interstate until the song was done.

but it gave us more time to embarrass ourselves.

i might like you less now that you know me so well.

i am not an old man having an existential crisis.

feel free to change pronouns/tense/etc. as necessary.

WITHOUT YOU WITHOUT THEM.

give me everything you've got

i'll take what i can get.

i want to hear your story and be a part of it.

who would i be without you?

i'll give everything i've got.

please take what i can give.

i want you to hear my story and be a part of it

$20.

it's a bad idea and i'm all about it.

when you wake up, i'll be gone again.

in another life, we were arsonists.

can you give me twenty dollars?

there's only so much i can take.

i know you have twenty dollars!

EMILY I'M SORRY.

she's asleep in the backseat.

emily, i'm sorry.

i just make it up as i go along.

i feel myself becoming someone only you could want.

she called me a fuckin' liar.

just take me back to montreal.

now i'm wide awake and you don't wanna talk.

TRUE BLUE.

you said you wanted to feel alive.

you say you're a winter bitch, but summer's in your blood.

you were spinnin' out.

when you don't know who you are, you fuck around and find out.

it feels good to be known so well.

i can't hide from you like i hide from myself.

you already hurt my feelings three times.

i remember who i am when i'm with you.

you've never done me wrong.

who won the fight?

change pronouns / tense / etc as needed !

oh, opposite, opposite.

that is very not good.

in science, knowing what doesn’t work is just as important as knowing what does.

basically, the thing that i’m working on isn’t doing the thing it’s supposed to be doing when i’m doing the thing that i’m doing to it?

does that make any sense?

sorry i blew up your house.

morse code? more like horse code.

to catch a con, you gotta hatch a con.

okay, let’s get back to committing numerous felonies.

i remember my first date, took him forever to stop crying.

each programmer has a distinctive coding style.

it’s not exactly comic con for me either!

two jerks for the price of one.

i’m not in the matrix.

we just discovered a tomb under a forgotten temple.

i did the math.

in my head where math is done.

i called you a decent hacker.

you are the best hacker i know.

and a pretty awesome person too.

and you tap its nose to give it affection.

so that’s what this is about?

you wanna save face more than you wanna save these people?

this is on you, that’s the job!

so i need you to trust me.

sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith.

my shower ran late.

i... slept over.

my alarm slept over.

i slept in. all alone.

she’s good, but she’s no me.

you left me in a room with a hundred boxes of garbage and a lunatic ranting about a brain ray.

so let’s just lower our expectations just a little bit, okay?

at least your ex didn’t try to kill you and then hand you over to a madwoman to be tortured.

i’ve also been thinking a lot about getting a cat.

actually, i am a gnome cleric.

don’t touch my keyboard!

damn, i’m good.

my guess is we both don’t get our way.

who does science in six inch heels?

stop yelling! it’s not helping me code.

we could use some of this to kill someone.

chocolate is universally adored.

oh, yeah, that’s gin.

how is that even a filing system?

i need you to type the periodic table, okay?

i find it centers me.

                       feel free to change pronouns/tense/etc as needed!  drug/overdose mention cw.

THE BOMB

you said this could have been the best thing that ever happened to you.

so you decided not to do it.

now you come back every summer.

you come back every summer like a carnivorous flower.

i think that you’re the most beautiful thing i’ve ever seen.

if i was free to love you, you wouldn’t want me, would you?

unavailability is the only thing that turns you on.

come here, baby, tell me that i’m wrong.

i’ve blown apart my life for you.

break me, shake me, devastate me.

i don’t love you.

i don’t love you, i just love the bomb.

i let it burn, but it just had to be done.

it just had to be done.

i’m in ruins, but is it what you wanted all along?

sometimes you get the good, sometimes you get a song.

MORNING ELVIS

when they dressed me and put me on a plane to memphis, i never got to see elvis.

i just sweated it out in a hotel room.

i think the king would have understood.

i think the king would have understood why i never made it to graceland.

i’ve been here many times, but i’ve never made it to graceland.

if i make it to morning, i should’ve come with a warning.

if i make it to the stage i’ll show you what it means to be sad.

i told the band to leave without me.

i’ll get the next flight.

i’ll see you all with elvis if i don’t survive the night.

if i don’t survive the night.

i guess i got my wish.

i’ll show you what it means to be spared.

SEARCH AND DESTROY

i’m a street walking cheetah with a heart full of napalm.

i am a world’s forgotten boy.

somebody’s gotta save my soul.

love in the middle of a fire fight.

i’m the world’s forgotten boy.

                        feel free to change pronouns/tense/etc as needed!   blood/death cw

HEAVEN IS HERE

oh, bring your salt, bring your cigarette.

draw me a circle and i’ll protect.

heaven is here if you want it.

oh, bring your boy, bring your bottle.

open your mouth, pour it down his neck.

i’ll turn your sea into a desert.

yes, i’m your girl.

i ride in my red dress and time stretches endless with my gun in my hand.

you know i always get my man.

every song i wrote became an escape rope tied around my neck.

DAFFODIL

i couldn’t help it.

yes, i let it get in.

i’m not bad.

i’m not good.

i’m not bad, i’m not good.

i saw the future in the face of a daffodil.

there is no bad, there is no good.

i drank all the blood that i could.

a generation soaked in grief, we’re drying out and hanging by the skin of our teeth.

i never thought i would get this far.

sometimes i see so much beauty i don’t think that i can cope.

i don’t think that i can cope.

MY LOVE

i was always able to write my way out.

there is nothing to describe.

tell me where to put my love.

do i wait for time to do what it does?

i don’t know where to put my love.

when it came, it was stranger than i ever imagined.

no cracking open of heaven, but quiet and still.

all my friends are getting ill.

RESTRAINT

have i learned restraint?

                         feel free to change pronouns/tense/etc as needed!

GIRLS AGAINST GOD

what a thing to admit

what a thing to admit that when someone looks at me with real love, i don’t like it very much.

kinda makes me feel like i’m being crushed.

is this something you’d like to discuss?

it’s good to be alive.

it’s good to be alive crying into cereal at midnight.

you’ll be sorry that you messed with this.

oh, tell me, it’s not over yet.

i am the picture of passivity.

when i decided to wage holy war it looked very much like staring at my bedroom floor.

i know it may not look like much.

you’ll be sorry that you messed with us.

i met the devil.

i met the devil, you know, he gave me a choice.

DREAM GIRL EVIL

well, did you miss me?

oh, come and get me.

i’ve been expecting you.

i’ve been expecting you, i’m ready.

am i your dream girl?

you think of me in bed.

make me evil, then i’m an angel instead.

at least you’ll sanctify me when i’m dead.

well, did i disappoint you?

did mommy make you sad?

do i just remind you of every girl that made you mad?

i am nobody’s moral center.

PRAYER FACTORY

all the things i ran from i now bring as close to me as i can.

why don’t you give me a call?

CASSANDRA

i used to see the future and now i see nothing.

they cut out my eyes and sent me home packing.

i used to tell the future, but they cut out my tongue.

and left me doing laundry to think on what i’ve done.

i used to move into the future, bring it all back.

now i creep out when no one’s about.

well, can you see me?

i cannot see you.

everything i thought i knew has fallen out of view.

everything i thought i knew has fallen out of view in this blindness i’m condemned to.

every song i thought i know, i’ve been deafened to.

there’s no one left to sing to.

all the gods have been domesticated.

you can take your complaints straight to the lord.

                  feel free to change pronouns/tense/etc as needed!

KING

we argue in the kitchen about whether to have children.

how much is art really worth?

but you need your rotten heart.

i am not mother.

i am no bride.

i am king.

a woman is a changeling always shifting shape.

i never knew my killer would be coming from within

i was never as good as i thought i was.

i was never satisfied.

FREE

sometimes i wonder if i should be medicated.

the feeling comes so fast and i cannot control it.

i’m on fire, but i’m trying not to show it.

i’m always running from something.

being clever never got me very far.

you’re too sensitive.

okay, but let’s discuss this at the hospital.

and for a moment, when i’m dancing, i am free.

is this how it is?

is this how it’s always been?

don’t you wanna call it off?

there’s nothing else i know how to do.

CHOREOMANIA

i am freaking out in the middle of the street.

i am committed now to the feeling.

i just kept spinning and i danced myself to death.

this is the end and i’m thinking about her.

do they speak to you?

you said that rock and roll is dead.

is that just because it has not been resurrected in your image?

BACK IN TOWN

never really been alive before.

i always lived in my head.

sometimes it was easier, hungover and half dead.

i’m back in town.

why don’t we got out?

i came for the pleasure, but i stayed for the pain.

the full moon shines down on these dirty streets.

you’re the star of the show.

i thought that i was here with you.

❛ i’m gonna bark at our waiter. ❜

❛ why? ❜

❛ i dunno, i just think he’d like it. ❜

❛ seeing a naked can makes me feel uncomfortable. ❜

❛ does spider have puspus? ❜

❛ freud has a piss kink. ❜

❛ i think i’m toad kin. ❜

❛ feel free to old yeller me if you gotta. ❜

❛ i do butt stuff for money. ❜

❛ he loves a good armpit sniff. ❜

❛ who doesn’t? ❜

❛ i’m gonna name my ass large celestial body. ❜

❛ what’s our state fish? ❜

❛ … we don’t have a state. ❜

❛ FUCK. ❜ 

❛ if you love a honkin’ milky mommer  —  that’s why. ❜

❛ the stuart little of pepperoncini. ❜

❛ if you sit there and breathe, you fuckin like breathing. ❜

❛ i don’t even know how to breathe. ❜

❛ okay pinocchio! ❜

❛ the twinkification of theo. ❜

❛ this is veering dangerously close into a subsection of porn. ❜

❛ are we gonna hold toes? ❜

❛ that’s 60% adam. ❜

❛ i just woke up from a nap and i have to read this? ❜

❛ love is stored in the shrimp. ❜

❛  bachelor hatred is stored in the shrimp. ❜

❛ let the crab have vodka! ❜

❛ are we eeby deeby or are we dancer? ❜

❛ with great power comes great sewing ability. ❜

❛ only spotify can judge me. ❜

❛ the feminine urge to eat a bowl of grapes. ❜

❛ i saw cars once and made it ______’s problem. ❜

❛ if olympics not slutty… why olympians sexy. ❜

❛ the olympics have been around for 500 slutty, slutty years. ❜

❛ tag yourself i’m the discus player who just started fucking screaming after he threw it. ❜

❛ well, well, well, if isn’t the consequences of my own actions. ❜

ARTEMIS

what will you do when she drinks the sea?

i always wondered why they all came back for more

all that she has traded for love is yours

what will you do when she takes your throne?

what will you do when she takes off your clothes?

BLOOD IN THE WINE

i was given a heart before i was given a mind

we fell from the sky with grace

there’s beauty in your beast

come and feel alive, lover

come and feel the love like a sinner

i was given a name before i was given blood

you were given your faith before there was made a god

shout it louder

THIS COULD BE A DREAM

this could be a dream or it could be real

dive into my mind and don’t come up for air

i sing sometimes to know i’m alive

i know i should figure it out on my own

i wish i knew how it felt to run

being alive can hurt so very much

if i touched you would ifeel it there?

could i trust love even if i’m scared?

i wish i could give like i’m longing to give

i wish i could live like i’m longing to live

this could be a dream

A LITTLE PLACE CALLED THE MOON

i can see it in my mind

i can see them get in line

we are going to the moon

THE WOMAN I AM

i spend a lot of time wondering why

i found the only woman i need to love

i think my sense of humor might have made things confusing for the heart

the woman i am is taken back to nothing

THE DEVIL IS HUMAN

father don’t blame us for trying to live

father don’t balme us for trying to bleed

why did you dress our pleasure up as greed?

why did you give us hearts we don’t understand?

do you envy how i’m free?

do you like to watch me kneel ‘cause you like the way it makes you feel?

do you like to watch me kneel?

does it hurt how i don’t look at you with fear?

you can burn the skin i’m in

HEATHENS

she bargains with the world

she knows what she deserves

we fell from sky with grace and landed in her soft and warm embrace

that is why we live like heathens

we’re guided by lust

we cry for those who burned beneath the flame

we stand beside the good and brave

everything you touch will be hers

her love is yours

her love is yours, but only if you give your heart to her

THE INNOCENT

i have been a dancer

i have been a lion

you give your all and in return you get a spark and watch it burn

the innocent life, the innocent touch, is never enough

he’d let me win if i let him stay

he left without a single trace

i don’t know why he said goodbye to love

you would never let me into your heart

i feel that i’m closer

EXHALE INHALE

i was a moving thing before i was a human being

i was the tree before it fell

my dear, come near

do you understand what is happening?

if you could fly and be the bird then you would see the forest burn

who is listening?

do you feel my hand? it’s there.

take from our world no more

take from my world no more

A TEMPORARY HIGH 

it seems we like to be living dangerously

her love is a temporary high

your body was warm

her storm was a temporary light

A DANGEROUS THING

something about you is soft like an angel

something inside you is violence and danger

i knew from the moment we met, you are a dangerous thing

when you are with me i feel like i’m living

i keep forgetting there’s no love in the end

something about you is warm and sedusive 

when you’re with me you’re cold and abusive

i don’t think i know myself

i hate when i fall for your illusion of love

feel free to change tense/ pronouns / etc as needed !

EVERYTHING MATTERS

i’m driving your car with you sleeping in the seat next to me

you twist and you turn

you are traveling fast like a bird in a dream

so pure and it hurts

you are part of the dawn where the light comes from the dark

you're a part of the morning and everything matters

you're a part of the movement and everything matters

here we are, an atom and a star

it is good and it hurts

GIVING INTO THE LOVE

i’m losing my connection

i’m tired of the rules 

i’m tired of the rules and your corrections

i am not an angel

i never had the world so why change for it?

someone out there is trying to find somebody whole

and if i’m not loved i guess that i am cursed

CURE FOR ME

i run from the liars

i know i can’t fight the sad days and bad nights

but i never asked for your help

i don’t need a cure for me

i don’t like the tension

who knows how to play with the gods?

you got nerves but they never show unless they hurt

YOU KEEP ME CRAWLING

if i keep forgiving maybe i’ll believe that you never meant for life to hurt

maybe i’ll recover if you set me free

but why does it make me feel like i am weak and small?

maybe it’s because i need to serve someone

maybe you could feel a little sympathy

why do you keep hunting like an animal?

maybe it’s because you need to own someone

giving into love should never hurt for me

giving into love should set me free

EXIST FOR LOVE

they say there is a war between the man and the woman

i’ve never felt like this before

everything in me begins to feel like i belong

i know i cannot heal the hurt, but i will hold you here forever

but then i learned the truth

everything good in life seems to lead back to you

every single time i run into your arms i feel like i exist for love

i exist for love

i can’t imagine how it is to be forbidden from loving

when you walked into my life i could feel my blood begin

you’re the other half

i know it sounds like a lot, but you really need to know

i know it sounds like a lot

you really need to know

i think it feels the same as an ocean in my veins

we exist for love

we exist for love, only for love

and i love you

feel free to change tense / pronouns / etc

QUEENDOM

the underdogs are my lions

the women will be my soldiers

drink until you’ve had enough

the sea waves are my evening gown

the sun on my head is my crown

i made this queendom on my own

i will be your warrior

i will be your lamb

i hunt the grounds for empathy

of care and thirst i have become

you have a home in my queendom

you have a place in my queendom

till queendom come

FORGOTTEN LOVE

can you tell if i’m cold?

will a new love await me?

i am touched by wonder

i am touched by wonder when i am blind in the dark

i am left with a rose in my hand

let it die

let it die, it’s the beauty of forgotten love

it’s the beauty of forgotten love

i forget how emotions dance when they aren’t inside of me

i forget how the sun feels when she isn’t around me

i’m in love with the hunt itself

it makes me feel alive

and i don’t care if you don’t understand why i cry

there is no ghost of you inside my mind

i am moving on

you are the reason i dance

i can lie in a dark room without the feeling that i’m lonely

GENTLE EARTHQUAKES

how cold can the tears feel on my skin?

so delicately, violently it begins

within this universe i will be lost

i’ll throw myself into the ocean

like a gentle earthquake it intensifies

it’s like my lungs are breathing fire

my body will be the truth and the light will guide her

my body will be the truth

the only traces of our love blossoming

i’m not home in a place where i have been broken

ALL IS SOFT INSIDE

i don’t know why but i feel down

you need to know i can’t go on

don’t let me change

don’t let me go

all around is stone, all is soft inside

all that i know lies within emotion

i need it all

i don’t know where to begin

my dreams are bigger than me

did you know that we’re all turning softer inside?