capricious.

new year, time to bring back my mumu. 

if you’d like to write with me, please refer to the links below. please note that, as I am 25+, I’d prefer to write with writers and characters 21+. 

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It was those fucking EYES. Andrej thought he was over Shane and thought he could resist him and had no feelings left for him but he just knew that as usual, he was lying to himself. It was probably stupid of him to even acknowledge Shane’s presence but it was a shock to his system seeing that face again. He wasn’t even sure how long it had been since everything from his past all blurred together in a mess of substances and whatever the fuck else was going on. “I need it to survive too,” he shot back, though he instantly knew how stupid and childish that sounded the second the words came out of his mouth. He’d forgotten the effect that Shane had on him and he wished to continue to forget that. 

“Can’t you just go to another coffee shop? There’s a million in town.” Literally any place but the one he worked in was fine because the last thing Andrej need was to see his ex every fucking day. Usually it wouldn’t have mattered but considering Shane was the one who got away – or whatever corny bullshit people said – he absolutely wanted him to remain away. It just made it easier this way because then Andrej didn’t have to miss what they could have had if he weren’t such a fuck up who destroyed anything good in his life. A suspicious eyebrow raised on his face as he stared at Shane. “Did you KNOW I work here?”

Another coffee shop? Shane supposed he could. If only to keep the peace. Thing was, though -- he didn’t want to. This shop had come highly recommended. This shop was close enough to his building that he could get a nice leisurely walk in, appreciate the sunshine, and still make it back before his break ended. He simply wasn’t willing to find and test out another shop. “No, I can’t,” Shane answered, the reply punctuated with a simple shrug of the shoulders. Had it been anyone else, he would’ve apologized. Better yet, he would’ve accommodated, but this was Andrej and the presumption that Shane could simply just upend his life because he was asked to. 

“No, I didn’t know.” Shane’s tone was incredulous. Did Andrej think that he’d come to this particular shop knowing that he worked here? As if Shane was trying to see him? “Why would I come here if I knew? I have better things to do than come visit you, Andrej.” Maybe that was a bit harsh, but their relationship wasn’t exactly cordial, and Shane was in desperate need of a caffeine fix. “If you’re done making assumptions, I need to go order my drink. I don’t have all day.”

▶︎

Manny grinned at the way Jay’s expression lifted, a look of joy across his features as he spoke fondly of his college experience. “I didn’t know I was dating someone with so much film knowledge. Did you have a favorite of everything watched?” he asked as he turned a corner. “Young Gregory Peck? You have good taste and it seems like you have a type.”

From the beginning, the circumstances of their arrangement were made delicately clear to him. Both men required a certain discretion when it came to their relationship. Manny had grown quite fond of Jay in a short amount of time, and though he was a little curious about the sort of person Jay’s wife was, he wanted to meet her if that’s what Jay wanted. “Okay. Then I’d love to meet her. It’ll give me a great opportunity to learn more about you. I can schedule us a private dinner some time in the coming weeks for all of us to get together.”

“Oh no, don’t be fooled,” Jay corrected. “I don’t have any kind of extensive knowledge or anything. I just took a class because I needed the easy boost to my grade and ended up becoming invested. Let’s just say that I learned a lot about myself during that time.” He laughed, the sound falling easily from his lips. The more he spoke, the more comfortable he became. “I was always particular to To Kill a Mockingbird, but I feel like that’s a generic answer.” His shoulders lifted slightly in a shrug. “I remember watching The African Queen, Gone with the Wind, Casablanca, and a few more. Undoubtedly when I developed a crush on talented, classically handsome men.”

His high school and college years had been tumultuous times. Jay had tried to date a few girls, had discovered that he was definitely gay, and had tried to run from the idea of it all. That need to hide that part of himself had been the major motivation for his marriage. Lena was more than aware of the things he kept secret from his family, and she accepted him wholeheartedly. Marrying her in order to protect her from her family’s whims had seemed like a small price to pay for that level of acceptance. 

Jay felt his shoulders drop, a weight lifting that he hadn’t even realized he’d been carrying. “Thank you,” he breathed, gratitude apparent in his tone. He hadn’t been kidding when he’d said that Yelena was important to him. “I wasn’t expecting anything fancy. We’d be more than happy to host you at home.”

▶︎

Despite still being in a dress, Ahri sat cross-legged on the floor, pillow set upon her lap. For how tired she was from the day’s activities, she suddenly found renewed energy at the prospect of being able to skip her last obligation for the night. What surprised her the most, however, was how accepting Bastiano was of the idea. Ever the rule-stickler he was. Granted, that was his job. Being a bodyguard probably meant he had to follow her around all the time, keep her safe, but most importantly, keep her from doing anything fun or interesting. He was her very own boredom police sometimes.

She clapped giddily, pleased with the turn of events. Given how capable Bastiano was with his job, Ahri had no doubt that he would be able to easily find her food. “Get something for yourself too since you’re stuck with me all night.” A breezy laugh parted her lips as she teased him. Although she had promised to not run off for the night, her track record was probably not reassuring for anyone who knew her. “And I make no promises, B, but how much trouble could I possibly make from inside of my own room,” she replied. “Go, go. I’ll be stuck inside here. Never need to worry about me.”

All night. Bastiano couldn’t help but sigh. It seemed as if the bodyguard had made a mistake in assuming that a tired Princess would mean a quiet night. Knowing Ahri they’d probably end up sneaking around the palace on some covert mission. With a quick nod, Basti turned on a heel and left the room. He should’ve reminded her to stay put and be safe, but that seemed like overkill considering she’d just promised to do just that, but the words how much trouble echoed in his ears even as he made his way through the empty halls that led to the kitchens. A few minutes passed before he was stepping through the doors and heading straight to the cupboards. A few more moments and he was leaving arms loaded with leftovers he’d managed to find in the fridge and snacks to keep himself occupied throughout the night. The logical part of his mind berated him for not having had the foresight to bring along a bag. Instead, he was loaded up with food, hands unavailable should an emergency arise. It was foolish, but being around Ahri sometimes had that effect on him.

It was a quick trip. Ten minutes or less. How much trouble could she have caused indeed? Basti was almost hesitant to find out. Still, he pushed his way through her doors, and settled the food on a desk laying out the spoils of his recon mission. “Behold,” he exclaimed gesturing to the spread, just a hint of amusement in his voice. “More food than your heart could desire.”

▶︎

The awkwardness lingered in the air for a few moments longer once the ring was removed. Sometimes he felt like he was asking Jay to hide a part of himself away in order for the two of them to be together. The secrecy alone meant they likely could never go public with their relationship. It was far more complicated than anything Manny would have expected, but Jay, well he was worth it.

“I was hoping you might enjoy it. It’s an old timey movie too. Roman Holiday,” he said as he started his car and began to drive off. The restaurant he had ordered from informed him earlier that it would be about a half hour before his food was ready, and Manny was all too happy to spend that time catching up with Jay. At the question, however, the actor paused momentarily in contemplation. It wasn’t that he was opposed to the idea, but he wondered if it was a good idea for Jay’s two worlds to collide. “Would you like me to?” he finally asked, one hand still on the steering wheel while the other reached out to his partner.

“Oh,” Jay exclaimed, pure delight flooding him at the mention of the film. “A good choice. I actually saw it once in college. I took a class on classic films. It was an easy A and I was able to watch a lot of films I’d never seen before. So, win win.” Jay shrugged almost sheepishly, one hand lifting to rub at the back of his neck as he continued. “I developed a crush on young Gregory Peck. So, you could say that I have a thing for classically handsome actors.” 

Jay was surprised at the ease with which the words rolled off of his tongue. He’d never been self assured enough to use lines. Especially not to a handsome, confident man like Manny. Yet, it had happened and he couldn’t take it back. Not that he would have wanted to if he could. Confidence felt good. Before the unexpected bravery could wear off, Jay nodded. “I wouldn’t have suggested it if I wasn’t sure. She’s important to me and I’d like for the two of you to get to know one another. Is that okay?” 

▶︎

She knew his words were coming before he even said it. Her nose scrunched instantly and she sank deeper against floor, head leaning back toward her bed. “It’s one dinner party. We can just tell them that I’m ill or something,” Ahri groaned. All that meant she’d have to change–again– and get ready and that took forever, just so she could sit quietly at a table that talked around her as she stabbed her fork repeatedly into whatever meal was set before her. She was ready to throw her pillow at Basti, even though she knew it wasn’t his fault that she had to go to this damn dinner, when he continued.

Instantly, she perked up, sitting upright on the floor. “Really? I mean, yes. Obviously. A princess needs her rest,” she agreed quickly with his point. A beat paused as she considered how she’d pass this message along to her mother. “I do still want dinner though,” she added with a knitted brow. “In my room, okay? I already said I wanted to stay in so I promise I’m not trying to sneak out to get food elsewhere.”

A slow smile crept across Bastiano’s face as he watched the change in her expression. It had been almost instantaneous. He knew that she’d expected his initial response -- Basti was something of a broken record, constantly droning on about the rules. For good reason, he always insisted. Rules kept her safe and ensured that he continued to have a job. But this one time, he was prepared to make an exception. 

“Just this once,” he reminded her, holding one hand up to preemptively stem the flow of any objections. “I’ll see what I can do about getting you some food. I’m sure there’s something in the kitchens.” He slipped out of his blazer and carefully laid it on the edge of her bed. He’d have no use for it if they weren’t going out. “I’ll let your father know that you’re not quite up to a night out tonight and that I’ll take full responsibility for ensuring that you don’t get yourself into any trouble.” It was something of a big ask. Usually, Bastiano preferred to spend the nights in his own rooms, quietly reading until it was time for bed. More often than not, that left Ahri with the space to escape when the need struck, but Basti was never too far behind. 

Phone already in hand, Basti typed out a few words requesting that dinner be brought to the Princess’s rooms. Alerting her father to the change in their plans would have to be done through phone call rather than text. His gaze came to rest on her, eyebrows raised pointedly. “I’m trusting you to behave yourself.”

▶︎

Perhaps it was too hopeful for Ophelia that people wouldn’t bring up her recent proposal and engagement. Rehearsals and work meetings had so many others coming up to her, congratulating her as she smiled and thanked them through gritted teeth. She couldn’t help but wonder if Edgar really had taken his ring off during their time apart. Ophelia couldn’t risk this plan being exposed, so she kept hers on as much as possible. It wasn’t a fancy or expensive ring but it still managed to feel heavy on her finger, like a constant weight and reminder of this impulsive plan. Those days blended and felt long and Ophelia felt as though she had memorized her lines for every possible question thrown her way. The party this weekend was going to be no different; she was sure of it.

She almost didn’t even get ready for the dinner party, but she finally forced herself to look presentable. The ring on her finger still felt foreign to her. Never did she imagine that she’d get married or engaged. Technically, they weren’t really engaged since this was all fake. Her thoughts occupied her attention so heavily that when she heard the doorbell, she jumped. One last look in the mirror before she grabbed her things and headed down.

“Good evening. You look… happy, for once.” Out of habit, she reached over to him, adjusting his clothing and dusting off his shoulder. “There. The perfect boyfriend.” She flinched before correcting herself. “Fiancé. Ring?”

“The prospect of marriage can do that to a man,” Edgar teased drily, lips quirking up as he remained still under Ophelia’s hands. She’d developed a habit of straightening his tie whenever she saw him. To the casual on looker, it may have seemed like a sweet and somewhat romantic thing for a partner to do, but a part of Edgar was offended. He took pride in his appearance and the suggestion that his tie was always crooked in her presence chaffed. Still, he remained still and allowed her to finish before brushing his lips against her brow. He’d never done that before and he knew that she’d probably make him regret it, but she’d requested that he put more effort in, and so, he was determined to do just that. 

“On. Of course.” He lifted his hand so that she could see the newest addition to the collection of rings that sat on his fingers. It seemed so out of place, Edgar couldn’t help but think every time he looked at his hand. “And...” he paused, hand sliding casually into the pocket of his pants. His other hand caught her under her chin, ensuring that her gaze was on his. “I don’t want you to be offended because the one you have is beautiful, of course, but I got something for you.” 

Edgar slid the velvet box from his pocket. Natalia had insisted that he do his duty as fiancé and buy her a ring. Even if she had one already. Even if he thought the custom to be antiquated. The oval cut he’d selected was simple (not quite in the same way as the one she’d selected, of course), but hinted a bit more at the wealth their appearances often suggested. “You don’t have to wear it if you don’t want to, but I figured, for appearance’s sake...”

▶︎

Manny wondered if this would get easier or if he’d ever stop worrying about being seen in public with Jay. If reporters found out the two were an item and that Jay was married, Manny’s career might plummet. Being able to keep this a secret felt exciting and perhaps that was part of the thrill. But sometimes he wished the two could be more public. He could only dream of one day getting to bring Jay to a premiere with him.

His eyes watched carefully as the man removed his wedding ring and placed it into his pocket. It was a strange ritual to watch and to be a passive participant of while also being the reason for it. Manny took a moment to swallow thickly before a smile returned to his lips at the proffered question. “I was thinking we could grab dinner to-go and then maybe a movie at this drive-in I found.” It sounded like a fun date if it also wasn’t so explicitly made so that the two wouldn’t be easily seen by others.

It took Jay a few more minutes to shake the awkwardness that always came with removing his ring. Yelena knew about these dates, of course. She’d been the one to encourage him to find someone who made him happy. He deserved it, she’d insisted. Still, the ritual of it always felt strange. A part of Jay wanted to turn to the man beside him and ask if he felt the strangeness too, but that would only lead to more awkwardness and Jay wasn’t sure he’d recover from that. 

“That sounds fun,” Jay agreed, eyes lighting up. “Very old timey romance.” A teasing half smile tugged at his lips as he watched Manuel navigate the car. Jay was a driver, had been since his teenage years, but it was still interesting to watch someone else perform the task. There was a simple grace to watching Manny drive that Jay enjoyed. “And maybe afterwards...” The quietly spoken words hung in the stillness of the car for a bit as Jay debated the best way to say them. They could ruin this night, this entire relationship. Still, he needed to at least suggest it. “You could come inside and meet her. Lena, I mean.”