fluorescent phallus

I feel cheated. no one on Reddit told me that tumblr is a serotonin factory. Keep liking and reblogging my posts please thanks

Just don't fly too close to the sun.

Throw me to the sun and I’ll get it pregnant

he understands the website your honour

is this a safe space to say that I want to pin someone against the wall and kiss them with teeth and tongue and then bring my lips up their jawline and down their neck with my hands lost in their hair... ?

Britain you’ve done enough dominating for a lifetime

okay this is the best reply everyone go home

paid for by the Irish)?)

reblog to destroy western civilization faster

the oldest reblogs for this post that i can find are from january 2nd of 2013. this can has been getting kicked around tumblr for almost 13½ years now

And yet somehow this is my first time kicking it!

dont talk to me or my clone or my shadow self or my reflection or my me ever again

standing in my room like a lost sim

Being a flop changed my life. The world is not my oyster, I am glowing. I walked into a pole this morning. There's very little I wouldn't do for $1,000

the first woman who saw cave paintings must've felt craaazyyyyyy. she couldn't even reblog them..

unlike most people I don't give into mindless consumerism [sees cute stuffed animal advertised online] Ooooh i'd like to have it with me every second of the day.

Big fan of calling male characters babygirls but I think we should start calling female characters babyboys too

I’ve seen people on here rail separately against calling male characters babygirls and calling female characters little guys, and while I think they’ve correctly identified a problem (“girl” has sexual or demeaning or childish connotations while “guy” is an example of masculine-as-neutral-default) I don’t think the answer is to get more essentialist in our language use but rather to freak it up more. he’s just a little gal. she’s my sweet baby boy. she’s my boyfriend. he’s my special girlie. she’s my beautiful husband.