:o ..o .o. o.. o:

Yaşadığı, gördüğü, duyduğu, dokunduğu kirli dünyanın yarı-canlı adasında,

böbreği taşlı, ayağı şiş, kalçası sızılı bir bedende olsa da, o halen burada.

Belki şaşkın umudunu yitirmiş ancak halen birşeyleri kurcalamayı istemekte.

Hayatı, tüm saflığıyla kurgularken, eğlenmeyi, gülmeyi, sevmeyi ve öğrenmeyi hazır sayan tarafı halen hayatta.

own on-going…

Why on earth would anyone start a blog? In asking this, I am well aware that there are -at least- as many subjective reasons to ‘why?’ as the number of bloggers out there! And I say -at least- for each blogger may have multiple reasons, which sadly isn’t the ‘reason’ for this blog. 🙂 Many times before I attempted creating blogs which I got bored of easily…  This very blog was one of those…

- Today I went to a wedding shop.

- A what shop?

- A Wedding shop.

- Since when do weddings get their shops?

- Since... nevermind. I went there and they had all sorts of gifts for engagement, wedding and shower parties. My best friend is getting engaged this weekend. So, I got them an engagement candle.

- A what?

- An engagement candle.

- Is the candle specific for an engagement?

- Yes, any.

- I hope so, or how many chances would one get to burn the damn thing.

- But that’s not the present!

- What’s the present?

- The present is a marriage fund piggy bank.

- Now, that I can understand. The newlyweds would need to start saving up for the wedding.

- Yes, but that’s not the best part?

- What is the best part?

- I also got 3 wrapping paper to wrap the presents with. I was going to get only one but it was saying buy 2 and get 1 free so instead of 1, I got 3 for £2.

- Aha! So you paid double for a wrapping paper when you only needed 1.

- Yes, but they are all very beautiful and will go especially well with presents when I wrap them.

- Oh yeah? What’s so special about them?

- Well, one of them has the photo of a candle in the shape of a heart which I will wrap the engagement candle with since it’s for the engagement of love.

- You’ve really given this a thought, haven’t you?

- That’s not all, I also got a wrapping paper with a bride and groom to wrap the wedding fund piggy bank present with... You know, because of the engagement to get married as husband and wife, hence the bride and groom wrapping paper.

- You out-did yourself for sure! And I suppose your third wrapping paper is something to do with the wedding or a future baby shower?

Once upon a space… [clears throat, takes a deep breath ]

-          Mr. President!

-          Yes, Ms. Deputy?

-          Do you wanna hear my plan regarding the drugs classification bill?

-          Not really, but I grant you permission to speak.

[clears her throat once again]

-          Given the…

-          Start now.

-          Errr, given the high volume…

-          Yeeesss! Get on with it quickly.

[Talking faster ]

-          Given the high volume of drug abuse related criminal cases despite all our efforts to police the trafficking, perhaps we should think about legalizing Marijuana. As you can see in this report (hands over a copy of the report) legalizing mariju…

-          ENOUGH MS. DEPUTY! I’ve heard enough of this ludicrous idea. Why the hell shall we do that?

-          Mr. President, study suggests that legalizing marijuana can serve our society in numerous positive ways!

-          Deputy, you must understand that you are swimming in dangerous waters! I suggest you take this poisonous idea out of your mind at once.

-          Mr. President, if you’d only let me fin…

-          Stop woman! I am not going to have another second of this preposterous idea. I’m willing to allow police to overlook large quantities of heavy drug smuggling but I won’t discuss marijuana.

-          Yes, but…

-          No buts deputy. Marijuana is the anti-christ of everything we stand for, meaning that legalizing it is counter productive.

-          What are you saying, Mr. President?

-          What I am saying Ms. Deputy is that if we let it loose, people will get high and become more affectionate and peaceful towards one another. Some might even start singing songs about peace and love and dance and laugh and become more relaxed. Now, we sure don’t want a slow down of this system, do we little ms deputy? Imagine the loss of profit if we’d have PEACE everywhere? What would we do with our billions worth of arms deals then?

-          But Mr. Preside…

-          Ms. Deputy, have you forgotten what you were taught in school about the history of the glorious battle of our Homosapien ancestors started for the total domination of mother nature? Surely, humans may have wiped out thousands of other species and billions of their own race but it is thanks to their nuclear wars that today I stand before you with 3 hands, two of which I use to hold this report and one to scratch my balls with, as I speak to you. Today, we are so much closer to finishing the longstanding battle with her, thanks to our artificially intelligent, genetically re-coded helpers. It wouldn’t be in our best interest to endanger that by allowing this demon plant to undo all that hard work?  You clearly don’t see but if we let it loose now,  people would find out how much oxygen a plant produces,  all the green-ists around the globe may start demanding it’s legalization all around the world as a method to help mother nature counterbalance global warming and radiation. The old bitch has proven to be very tough and giving her an ammunition as such would help to turn the tables around in her favor.

Since the god made damn plant is so good with absorbing the radiation from the contaminated environment, it might cause the rejuvenation of all those contaminated areas and atomic wastelands since the end of WW2 and especially after the beginning of WW3. The world with cleaner air, soil, and water would be a direct threat to our national security as it would challenge our superiority of destruction that stands dead in countless exterminated ex-metropols.

Why do you think our Pharmaceutical, Construction, Oil company owning businessman and statesman forefathers outlawed it in the wake of the 20th century? Was it not to stop people from realizing the benefits of such a natural medicine and instead turn to profit making chemical medications which due to their side effects results in more medications and ultimately more profit?  

It’s barely a decade since people moved their diets fully onto synthetic food as everything that comes from soil is –as the official term goes- ‘soooo contaminated’. Why should we endanger our new technological and lab-designed food by introducing the highly nutrient hemp which supports the immune system? Imagine the mayhem if people would make low-cost health foods and drinks out of it. Man forbid, our hunger problems and costly pharmaceuticals would get sorted out quicker and in lower costs.  And what if people realize that they can use hemp to create strong, affordable,  durable, recyclable materials used in construction, clothing, and paper that are far stronger and environmentally friendly than the conventional ones. So, Ms. Deputy, you must do well to put this highly poisonous and not really profitable idea of yours out of your mind.

-          Yes, Mr. President.

As I was driving down the dual carriageway, trying to take my friend D to her home, who had a bit too much to drink getting herself drunk and her stomach upset, a small saloon car overtakes me rushing to pass before the light goes red.

D, who usually isn't much of a drinker nor a singer, happens to be singing "Let it be, Led it beeeee, led it beeeee, visperrr di wörds of wizDom, led it beee..e" When the small car reached the lights, the time indicator was still counting back from 3 in green and I thought to myself, "Xe made it but I clearly can't, so lets reduce speed and let the red light be."

The moment I finish my sentence, a huge 4x4 jump out of nowhere, clearly at the red light, hitting the small car from the front right causing it to take a full spin while the 4x4 ends up on the curb of the road on the left.

I stop D's version of Let it be by saying "Holy shit! An accident had just been."

In the 10 seconds or so that it took us to reach there, I kept hoping that there are no mortalities or any heavily injured. And I found myself being thankful for it wasn't us. A feeling of shame or guilt or something of the sort followed; as if I might have jinxed the small car by envying its success in making it to green seconds before the horrible accident.

At the traffic lights, I stop to go and see if anyone is hurt, when a big guy from the 4x4 starts hitting and pushing around the smaller guy of the smaller car.

D, sitting next to me says, "For Goodness sake! These people just had a massive accident and there are people with bloody noses and instead of seeing if everyone is ok, they’re fighting on top of it, as if to kill off those that the accident couldn't manage"  and she urges me not to get out of the car.  

So instead of getting involved, we decide to call the emergency to report the accident, casualties and the fight that broke out.

First, my fingers dial #112 for Emergency Services.  A sleepy voice answers the phone.

-Hellloooo.

-Good morning. I want to report a car accident that just occurred at the traffic lights of National Sports Arena. There seem to be people with injuries but I don't know many details regarding their condition. A fight broke out so I didn't want to get involved as I have a friend in my car who is not feeling well.

-Yes but this is the ambulance, you need to call the police. We'd only come if the police tell us to.

- Sorry, I thought this was the emergency. Isn't there some sort of switchboard?

-Only the ambulance here. You need to hang up and call 155 for the police.

-Ok. But please know that there are injured people.

-OK. But we'd only come if the police...

-I see, yes, thank you, bye.

The green lights were almost back on again by the time I finish the absolute useless conversation that just occurred due to my lack of knowledge of different numbers for Emergency Services. I was somehow under the impression that Emergency numbers would at least be able to switch connections and have a way to be simultaneously informed, for some accidents may need the assistance of Police, Paramedic and Fire brigade all at once,  I put my emergency indicators on to signal the cars approaching from behind and moved to find a safe spot to call 155 for police.  When I finally rang, an automated voice greeted me after the first ring to let me know that I've called the police and that my call will be recorded for safety and whatever purposes. The metallic voice was followed by a longer ringing before answered by a policeman who hesitantly said:

-115 police!

-Hi! I want to report a traffic accident that took place at the traffic lights of the National Sports Arena

-Ok. Where did you say?

-At the traffic lights of the Sports Arena.

-Ok. Tell me what happened?

-I was traveling from east to west and the small car in front of me was hit by a 4x4 while passing at green lights.

-Who hit who?

-The big car hit the small car.

-Did the small car cross at the red light?

-No, the small car passed at the green light.

-So the big car passed at the red light.

-Appears to be so.

-What direction was the small car heading did you say?

-From east to west.

-How about the big car?

-It was heading towards south from either north or turning right from the west.

-What time did the accident happen?

-About 3-4 mins ago I guess.

-What happened?

-When I passed them, I noticed a woman with a bloody nose.

-How many were in each car?

-I don't know, I didn't get out as they started to fight.

-Who had a fight?

-The big dude from the big car started to smack, punch and push around the guy from the small car shouting at him for crossing when it was red light but I saw that he crossed when it was still green.

-Ok. Thank you, we had already received another report for this accident a minute before you called but thanks anyway. We are coming.

And he hangs up the phone.

* * *

A few hours later, I was in my bed at home, trying to sleep with scenes from the whole night including the accident and what happened when my phone rings. 

It's a number I don't know but I reluctantly answer. The voice on the other end mumbles a few words yet I don't understand thus I ask him to speak clearer. He clears his throat and the voice belongs to a young man.

-It's the police calling regarding the accident. Did you witness the accident?

-Yes, I called the ambulance and the police. I think you can find the records of it.

He asks my name and I tell him.

- You are the only independent witness to the accident, so we'd like you to come to the central city police station and give a written statement regarding the accident.

Apparently, both sides of the car accident had been claiming that they passed at the green light. So I give him a full account of the story I witnessed and tell him that I would give a written statement on the afternoon once I get some sleep.  In an almost shouting voice he tells me:

-There had been an accident and there are injured people so you need to come in for the statement right away.

I tell him that I am at home in bed, tired and sleepy after a long night shift and that I'll go in as soon as I get some sleep or that I can quickly pop down to my local police station.

The volume of the voice gets even higher in a shouting manner repeats:

-No, you have to come here.

-Ok, I will come but I am knackered so I need some sleep. I’ll come in as soon as I get some rest. - It's the police talking to you and when the police tell you to come in, you will come immediately.

Ever since I know myself I never reacted well when someone shouts at me, especially given a situation that I have no fault in so  as soon as he finishes his order, I reply:

-Hang on a second! Who do you think you are even if you are police? I am a citizen who witnessed an accident and informed you. I understand you need a signed statement which I am willing to provide! Don’t forget that you are calling to ask for my help. Where do you find the right to shout at anyone, but especially a citizen who is willing to help you? Is this how you talk to the public? Besides, I've already told you I’ll as soon as I get up. My written statement will not be any different than what you have on the record from the phone call...

He cuts me off and with a slightly reduced volume yet equally ordering tone, says:

-Look! There are injured people and people got into a fight so you WILL come in now to give your statement.

I sharply cut him off and in a pissed off and somewhat condescending manner say:

-Well brother, good luck to you as there is no power on earth that can get me out of this bed now, drive 10 miles to come in for a statement. I wish what I have to say would have the healing powers to make the injuries go away in which case I'd come right away but I doubt my witness statement would undo the accident, the fighting or the injuries sustained by the passengers of either car. Besides, what kind of a police are you? I'm telling you that I'm tired and sleepy which is one of the top reasons for traffic accidents and you are asking me to drive in this half-asleep state which potentially may lead to accidents?

And I let him understand that it's not going to happen until later that day. Realizing he won't get anywhere with it, he asks me to hold the line while he calls his superior officer.

The new voice on the other end sounds to belong to an older and more experienced police officer as he picks up the phone to address me in a polite and calm manner.

Before he goes any further I ask his name. He tells me that it’s Y. I complain to Y about the treatment I got from the officer that I just spoke to. He told me that it'had been a busy night with tensions high and apologizes on behalf of his rookie colleague.

I tell him that I’m about to go to bed but that I can go there later in the day. He informs me that their shift is almost over and the new shift can’t do the paperwork of the previous day due to a silly rule but that I can either give my statement to a policeman who worked on that shift later on the day or go to either in the central city station or my local police station, whichever would be more convenient in 3 days when it’s their shift again. We agree to talk then and hang up.

‘💩’ Ne ce?

flow

Warning! Contains scenes that some viewers may find disturbing!

Didn’t actually want to disturb, Or in a way, wanted to But didn’t know how to…

Rahatsız etmek istemedi aslında, Ya da bi şekil istedi Ama nasıl yapacağını bilemedi…