DeepFriedGrits

grilled peaches + cream + donut = 🎇

Feedism has so warped my perspective on things. Like, why am I disappointed that I ~only~ ate a 1,000 calorie surplus yesterday.

Nearing my highest weight again, but what if I just blew right past it 🤔

When you eat so much you slip into a trance, and you only snap back to reality because it’s been an unusual amount of time since your last bite, and that’s because you’re fully leaned back in the chair, left arm bracing against the table holding you up, right hand carefully floating the next bite of sushi from the plate all the way to your mouth. It’s navigating this giant distance from plate to mouth that’s created the unusual amount of time between bites, and you realize this has been happening for a while because all you see on the table in front of you are empty takeout containers. In the moments for all these thoughts to process, you become aware of just swollen you feel, of how you can’t bend in the middle, of how your breathes are short, of how your shirt clings to your middle. It’s like going from 0-60 in three seconds. It’s exhilarating. You grab the last container of rice and delete it. You’re glad you have dessert. Three deep fried Oreos and ice cream. Inhaled. You stand up for the first time, and your center of gravity is way off. Your belly feels like it’s being squeezed, yet somehow grows outward and stretches before you. You touch your belly to see how tight it feels, and even you’re surprised. Satisfied.

If you placed a five gallon bucket of Welch’s fruit snacks in front of me, there exists a non-zero chance that I will in fact fuck up that entire bucket.